Really struggling with 7 month old

[ralice]

Hi all. I've been reading posts on here for a few weeks now and wanted to post my own problem as I just can't keep going on like this. Sorry this is so long!! And sorry if it's in the wrong place, I wasn't sure where to put it. Please move it if necessary.

I'm trying to get my LO on to EASY but it's proving difficult. He's 7 months on the 27th and has never slept through the night. I think the most I've ever got out of him is 4.5 hours, and that was when we had to resort to my OH cuddling him in our bed a few months ago.

He feeds quite often (generally speaking 1 side per feed). I know he 'should' be stretching out his feeds but I don't know what to do as he has full feeds each time, particularly at night. I've tried settling him without food at night and sometimes he'll go back to sleep but he'll wake within an hour and drain my by-then-engorged boob. His feeds last between 4 and 8 minutes during the day, a bit longer at night as he's sleepy. When he was little he'd fall asleep during every feed but now even if he falls asleep, he wakes as soon as I move him off, so I'm not even guilty of feeding to sleep any more!

I should probably add that he has eczema and suspected CMPA. He's bf but I haven't given up dairy because the dermatologist seems to think it's not a dairy allergy, but has still advised dairy-free weaning, which is really confusing. No allergy testing until he's 1 year old. We're back at the dermatologist tomorrow for yet more creams as his eczema comes back as soon as we stop steroid creams. He has between 1-3 solid feeds per day; it's varied because I can't always 'catch' him in a non-sleepy, non-fussy, non-boob-hungry moment. He starts pulling at his ears, yawning and rubbing his eyes after he's been awake for about 1 hour, but I don't put him to sleep then as I'm sure it's far too early. He's probably just permanently knackered

Last night was absolutely terrible and I just don't know why. Every day is so different. I've tried waking him at 7am and letting him sleep until he wakes naturally but nothing seems to work. Sorry if this is confusing, I've tried to stick to the correct format. Here's the past couple of days:

Tuesday:

WU: 8.20
E: 8.25 (bf)
A
E: 9.30 (solids)
A
E: 10.15 (bf)
S: 10.40 (2hrs 18mins)
E: 1pm (bf)
A
E: 2pm (solids)
A
E: 3.10pm (bf)
S: 3.25 (1hr 45mins)
E: 5.15 (bf)
A
E: 6.30 (solids)
Bedtime routine: 7pm
E: 7.35 (bf)
S: 7.50 (1hr 27mins)
NF: 9.21 (bf)
S: 9.40 (2hrs 58mins)
NF: 12.40am (bf)
S: 1.10 (1hr 54mins)
NF: 3.10 (bf)
S: 4.11 (3hrs 3mins)

Wednesday day:
WU & E: 7.17am
A
E: 8.30 (solids then bf)
S: 9.19 (57 mins)
E: 11.12 (bf)
A
E: 12.15 (solids)
A
S: 12.54 (37 mins, in pram whilst out)
E: 2.10pm (bf)
A
E: 3.55 (bf)
S: 4.05 (1hr 53 mins)
E: 6.23 (bf)
A
Getting fussy despite long nap so bedtime routine 7.15
E: 7.35 (bf)
S: 8.35 (49 mins)
NF: 9.33
S: 10.25 (1hr 13mins)
NF: 11.38
S: 11.57 (26 mins)
S: 12.35am (1hr 15 mins)
NF: 1.51
S: 2.31 (1hr 24 mins)
NF: 4am
S: 5.15 (2hr 14) <-- had to give up and get OH to cuddle him to sleep
WU & E: 7.30am

^^ You can see from last night that he was awake for hours. E.g. from 9.30 until 10.25, 1.50 until 2.31, then 3.55 until 5.15. I tried all sorts: PUPD, lying next to him in the cot, cuddling, tummy rub, lullabies, classical music... Sometimes he'd fall asleep for a couple of minutes then wake up crying. Other times (like with classical music) he lies there with his eyes open for a few minutes, then cries. At 5.15am I had to give up and get OH to take over. (Actually, he came into LO's bedroom because he heard me crying...). LO then woke up at 7.30 when OH got out of bed to go to work and had to let go of him.

Please help!! I know this is super long and confusing but please, if anyone can see any glaring errors/simple tweaks, please let me know. I can't see the wood for the trees. As I said, every day is different, LO is so unpredictable. I try so hard to do the right things but it seems to be getting worse and worse. I'm really struggling and LO isn't very happy either.

[creations]

Hi there and welcome to BW forums
It's great you decided to post your question for support.

I just wanted to welcome you really and let you know that your post has been seen.
I'm not great with BF advice (or allergy advice either really) as I wasn't able to BF beyond the first few weeks but there are plenty of experienced Mummies here and I'm sure you'll have some responses very soon.

Hang in there

[trimbler]

Hi there, welcome to BW forums and (((hugs))) you must be exhausted

Just some initial thoughts to consider/questions which might help others to get a better idea of what might be going on...

Intrigued as to whether you offer the other side each feeding - does he only take one side because he doesn't want the other, or because you don't offer the other? I know Tracy encouraged single sided feeding, but here on the forums we tend to feel that she'd have probably updated some of her advice if she were still alive today - mine ended up feeding from one side each time because I seem to produce lots of milk (too much even, but that's another issue altogether ) but others will always need to drain both sides because that's just what that particular combination of LO and mum needs to do.

Tuesday actually seemed pretty ok to me, except for that hour-long NW around 3-4am. Three NFs around 7mo is more than some, but since he's not going long between feeds during the day, that might just be how he is for the moment, or it might be that if he's able to take both sides at one feed then he'll start to stretch longer, day and night. Other than that, I noticed his A times are a little on the short side, which may again be just how he is (3h would be more average - but that's just an average after all, some do more and others less, mine were both low A LOs), but you may find he needs a little more A time overall during the day, which you might be able to achieve by offering a CN in the late afternoon. I just felt that hour long NW might have been because he hadn't quite had enough A during the day - wdyt? Most LOs need to be doing at least 3h each A time before they can drop down to two naps. So I'd try and aim for a day like Tuesday again, but offer a short CN in the late afternoon with a short A time following, see what happens... Expect to push out those A times a bit soon, but at his pace, no big rush

Looking at Wednesday, I suspect that his first nap was UT since he'd only been up 2h before (Tuesday's 2h20mins seemed to work much better for him), and then he fell into a tricky UT/OT cycle - he got OT after his usual A time because he'd had a shorter first nap, so then he did a classic OT 30min nap. I reckon he probably then crashed out late afternoon because he was really tired after that, but then got a bit messed up because of the long, late nap, which is why the night went wonky We can't really help days like that from time to time, but iiwm I'd have probably capped his late afternoon nap so that he could be ready for an earlier BT - he was certainly tired enough for it that night, but probably unable to settle well because of that long nap he'd only just got up from. Does that make sense?

[*Ali*]

My first thoughts would be to push the A time to closer to 3hrs because some of those naps probably are UT.

If I were you I would try to eliminate dairy for 4-6wks weeks and see if it helps.I cannot understand if he is suspected CMPA why this is not the first thing the doctor would recommend to try. Harmless and much safer than steroids I would think.

Many babies need a top up once A times get long before their solids intake increases.

[Buntybear]

Hi there and welcome to the BW boards 

My son had various allergies when he was a baby (milk, wheat, egg) and had awful skin until we worked out what his allergies were. I took milk out of my diet when he was 3 weeks old and was in hospital with vomiting. Wheat and egg we didn't know about until he eat them when weaning and was sick and came up in hives.

The point of my story is that no one in the medical profession told me it could be a milk allergy when he was a baby. We literally just had to google to and work it out ourselves. We even paid to go to a dermatologist privately his skin was so bad. We were sent home with more creams.

I would 100% try and take milk and probably even soy out of your diet. It is hard and you need to do your research and be prepared but it but just be what what you all need.

Does my LO have food intolerances?

Has he had any other symptoms? Reflux, vomiting maybe? If not then it could be a 'mild' case of MPI and he will probably grow out of it. He may even tolerate a bit of processed dairy in your milk but to start I would cut it ALL out and give it a couple of weeks to see if it helps.

We have a food allergies board and a colic, reflex and crying board where you can have a look through other peoples threads and post if you wish for support.

Hope this helps x

[ralice]

Thank you so, so much for your replies!

Trimbler, with regards to feeding one/both sides - LO will often keep drinking until he's sick. Even if I just offer the one side, sometimes he'll keep going back for more then as soon as I sit him up to burp him he'll be sick. If I offer the second side he will take it, then vomit. This is why I try to just offer one side, and as soon as he starts popping on/off and fussing I put my boob away. I sometimes do give him both sides at bedtime in the hopes of filling him up but it doesn't seem to change how often he wakes during the night!

Any suggestions on how to extend his A times? Today he's been falling asleep almost bang on 2 hours because by 1 hr 45 mins he starts rubbing his eyes, pulling his ears, arching his back and fussing. I'm scared of delaying his naps in case he gets OT and then we get stuck in another bad cycle.

Ali and Buntybear, we managed to speak to a dietitian whilst at the hospital for his dermatology appointment on Friday. She prescribed neocate formula (as I might need to go back to work soon) and finally did suggest that I give up dairy for a few weeks, so I've started that. If it turns out this is the cause of his bad skin (and consequently his poor sleep) I will kick myself for not giving it up when I first queried CMPA back in January, when the dermatologist told me it was unlikely. D'oh!

I will take a look at the allergy board, thank you for your replies

[Buntybear]

Hi, I would start off by increasing his A times by 15 mins for a few days, and then another 15 mins for a few days.

chronological EASY samples, 7-9 months

Here are some simple days for a 7 month ld so you know what you are aiming for. You might not be able to get to the 'standard' A times whilst he is still NWing so much but it gives you an aim x