Nap nightmare

[ewabear]

Hi, I am at wits end with DD3. There is no way I can resettle her. She is 4 months old. I have tried 1:45 window, 1:50 window, 1:55 window and 2 hours window and she still does 30-45 min naps. This des not allow me to move to 4 hourly feeding. She is very difficult to settle too. It looks like Im spending hours on shushing and patting with no result. With short naps like this I run out of time for last cat nap and have to have 5:30 BT ad last nap finishes around 4 ish and she has to be in bed by 5:30 otherwise she cannot settle for ages. What os the best technique for resettling, i have been trying for 10-15 min but DD1 gets upset. Also this crestes this tired circle and results in DD1 having have to be carried a lot. Yes I can post my EASY but I have already posted on naps and easy with no result. How long should I sleep train for, I know there are set backs and grow spurts, but it should not be constant and it should last for a bit. I already went through this with DD 1 and I only got her sleeping ok when she was 18 months old!

[jessmum46]

Hi and hugs, this age is rough for sleep for many babies, especially due to those awful short naps! 

Seeing your EASY would help, some babies need more than the average A time and it could be she is lower sleep needs.  I'm happy to take a look though I appreciate others have looked before

How does she go to sleep currently?  You asked in your post about resettling but then asked about sleep training?

When it comes to resettling honestly I do think it is liberating to consider the possibility that she may just not be one of those who resettles easily.  DD was like that, she was lower sleep needs/higher than average A and I could never resettle.  It was happier for all of us when I accepted that and found a way to work with it.  So you may not ever have the classic 4h EASY but you may have an ok one, you just need to be a bit flexible.

So for example:

WU 7am and E
A 2h
nap 9-9.45
E 11am
A 2h
S 11.45-12.30
(no E)
A 2h
S 2.30-3.15
E 3.15pm (only 15 mins over 4h)
A 2h
S 5.15-6pm
Last A a bit shorter, say 1.5h
E and then bed for 7.30pm.

Thoughts??

[ewabear]

I will try this. At the moment we are progressing to 3 NW and I just tried to put her to bed. I gave her 2h A. I went to her room at 1:50 and as soon we got there she started screaming, and when we started moving towards the bed it got worse. It is like she knows what is coming.
Shall I just stop trying to resettle her? I have a very lively toddler and it is difficult to spend so much time with DD2. We almost never get out as it is either sleeping or feeding time and because she only has short naps S and E are next to each orher only first thing in the morning.  She does not like sleeping in her pram either. Your EASY seems ok, I'll try it, I don't think she can make her last nap 45 min though it is always short one.

[jessmum46]

It was just a rough idea, you can adapt it as and how you want

Why not try a consistent 2h A and a slightly shorter last one, keep a track of how things go for a few days then post here and we'll see if we can help you adjust things a bit?

It's up to you about resettling but I must say I did feel a weight off when I just decided to get on with the day if mine clearly weren't resettling within about 5 mins x

[ewabear]

WU.  6:30
E.     7
S.    8:30
A.    9.05
E.    10:40
S.    11:00
A.    11:30
S.    13:20
A.    13:55
E.     14:45
S.     16:15. Asleep after 30 min of shush-patting
A.     16:50
BT.    18:00
Asleep at 18:40
 
I gave up resettling as It was too difficult? Why is she resisting sleep so much, as soon as we go to the bedroom she gets really upset, doesn't want to be held, but does not want to be in bed either.

[jessmum46]

Does she wake happy from her first nap of the day?  I'm only wondering because DD used to do 37 minute naps (to the second!) when she was UT and by pushing her A time more than 'average' for her age she eventually got to a better place and took some decent naps.  Now I'm not saying the same is true for you but it could be worth it if she seems happy enough after that first sleep time.