Anders45,
Maaaany maaaany hugs! Honestly, minus the twins part... I was on the same. I have a now 11 week old and barely seeing a bit more of a turning point (not to discourage or stress in anyway)
I was in the same b/c I too have a 4 year old and all I felt was sadness and guilt b/c of the full time care a newborn needs. All I wanted/want is for that time w/ my oldest again
It's rough and everyone needs time to adjust, including the other twins but on the bright side, they do have each other and aren't "alone" in a sense, but I'm sure they miss mommy a bit too! All of this is so normal and it's super hard. I promise you one thing, all of it will pass sooooooo fast (even if it seems so slow right now) and you will forget these crazy first days. With due gone everyone will adjust, and you'll be back w/ that one on one time w/ your other babies too
...maybe arrange a few times a week to get care for the newborn and you game the twins out to eat or to get ice cream!
...after a feed you can go and come back!
The truth of the matter is, your new one needs all your love, attention and help. Imagine, she's been inside of you all this time being assisted to sleep! When you were out and active, you were rocking her to sleep. It's also loud in there! ...and she's super snuggle! Right now it's best to think of it as SURVIVAL MODE. Try not to worry much about it b/c in a few days or short weeks- it will change again
... Many growth spurts and wonder weeks!
My advice is to try and take time to know her. Later on, the sleep will come. You have your hands full! I think one night didn't affect her-- she probably just wants your comfort. To smell you, to hear your heart beat, and feel your warmth. Your all she knows. You can't spoil her so young. Right now, newborns can't sleep...that means we don't. I know shh pat worked for your twins but all babies are different. Try a head rub perhaps? Or caress her back gently?
Best tips to help her sleep is, swaddle, and white noise! Not all babies take the paci but if you really would like to, maybe consider trying different pacifiers and see which she may take to? The soreness will subside and if it gets worse, (cracked bleeding super painful nipples) consider visiting a lactation consultant as latch might not be right. If all she wants is to suck, it's so normal. She might be learning how to eat too still and at this age they take AWHILE to eaaaat! They are getting the hang of it! All day they are attached to the breast
!! Keep in mind they use our breasts as comfort as well
hang in there as the breast feeding will be smoother as time passes. Try and stick to the Eat Play/Activity Sleep as it can help getting to know what baby needs next- even though right now the activity part will be sleep, or she may constantly sleep on the breast but it passes. Stick with the routine of this and it makes things a bit easier too! Use a swing if need be to help her get some long sleep. Right now just try to get her to sleep in any way so you can too. Later, you can work on weaning.
Hugs!!!!!! It will pass <3 feel free to join on for any help you need xoxo