A routine change for my super-busy boy

[michaeljacknnugg]

I can't push the second nap, and therein lies the problem. He has to be up and out for 3pm for the school run.

ETA if he can't sleep on the go any more, then we have to fit in the daily visit to the horses plus (long, BLW) meals into his A times. That's going to be tough because realistically, it would have to be the second A, and that would likely prevent me from getting anything else done.

Today so far:
Wake 6.20
Nap (DH took him in the end, I was so frustrated and needed to walk away) 10.20-10.40
Just put him down at 14.00, quiet so far so we will see how it goes.

If he doesn't need that early nap, why is he getting upset (really upset) regularly around 8.30? It's not like him to be upset for no reason.

[michaeljacknnugg]

What routine are you on now, GAM?

[Martini~]

You can push and cap the first nap so the second end before 3pm. That's not a problem. He might be extremly OT of grumpy at 8:30 and OT at 9:00 this problem with settling but being honest my son now almost 2.5y gets up at 6:30/7:00 and is grumpy at 8:30 to the dot... from the moment he was 6months or so LOL. Just not his time:))).

[michaeljacknnugg]

Funny things, aren't they?

Well, he self settled for that second nap (thank goodness) and my big boy manned the baby monitor whilst playing mine craft, so I got a bit of time out in the sunshine. I needed that.

The rest of the day was
Nap 14.10-14.50
Bed 18.30. Fought it again, looked very very tired but went off with patting. I'm staying until we get past the first sleep cycle...

Tomorrow we have a busy day so we will just have to make it up as we go along.

I'd be very happy to extend the length of his day rather than cut naps atm, a 12hr day is a real rush and we don't really get any adult time in the evening now DS1 is bigger. What do you think his day would look like with a shorter night?

[Martini~]

Hmmm, I am not quite sure you can go for a longer day now when your nap has to end at 3pm. With 1.5h nap he can be OT in the evening what do you think? In general I would go for something like:

Nap at 9:30 or 10:00 - probably a short cycle so 45min to 1h if he is an LSN
Nap at 1/1:30 till 3pm
BT at 7pm
Right now he seems to be a bit OT in the evening as his last nap is short and the longest A is there?

[michaeljacknnugg]

Hahaha!! Sorry!!

His first nap is max 40mins and he can go all morning (and recently has) on 3 minutes! That's why I'm not keen on capping, really.

He normally manages one short (40mins, normally the first one) and one long (1hr20ish) nap a day.

He needs that long A to bed. I've experimented with a shorter one and all it does is lengthen the day. He's OT today, because he's only had 2x40mins and a short night last night.

[Martini~]

It's not a surprise that his first nap is short if he is going on it 2h after waking and right now have even problems with settling. Still I would experiment with A length as your seems very different through the day and it's difficult to say id 3h will make him OT or UT:).

[michaeljacknnugg]

I feel like I've been experimenting forever, that's the thing. And last week when I brought that nap forward and he started to self settle, I felt like I might be able to get my life back. I'm so, so fed up of spending my life in a darkened room and trying to work out when to put him down. If he needs holding to go to sleep, he needs holding to stay asleep.

He always has one short, one long nap, no matter what I do. Or two short if I can't resettle. He errs on the side of less sleep rather than more.

He's just woken after 50mins and sobbed his little heart out with me patting him. I could only take 10mins, I picked him up and instantly he was calm and went off again with patting. I won't be able to put him down for a good while yet. And I've been up here on my own with him (bath, bed) for two hours now. No one has even come to see how we are, even though I was distraught this morning.

I've had it with sleep, I really have. I am doing this 99% of the time solo and it's driving me crazy.

[grace annes mommy]

What routine are you on now, GAM?

We're doing a long a.m. nap and shorter p.m. nap but it's starting to change.

W 7/7:30
Nap #1 - 11:00 til 12:30/1
Nap #2 - 4:00 til 4:30/45
Bed 8ish

Works for our school run at 2:15

But we've had a string of really good nights but EWs.  So she's been up by 6 most days.  We've also had days like yesterday where she hasn't done a long 1st nap and we've scraped by on 2 catnaps.  We've got 2 weeks left in the school year, so I'm going to try to keep up that long a.m. nap as best I can (even if I have to APOP) til school's out.  Then, I'm hoping to switch to a longer p.m. nap to make it easier to get out in the a.m.s...Hopefully....

Could morning crankiness be hunger?

Sorry your so frustrated by his sleep, hun.  I can relate to not having much help with it all and when I can't seem to sort a workable routine for the family, I get really frustrated too.

Do you think he's teething or anything right now?

[michaeljacknnugg]

I don't know about teething. Dribble and chewing would say maybe, but he's happier to play than last time. When he got the bottom two I couldn't put him down!

Hunger I don't think is an issue. He's cranky at 8.30 even if he's been fed at 8, yk?

[*Liz*]

His night are pretty dodgy though, hey? I bet that explains why he is tired early in the am. It is a tag on to the night type of thing - which in the long term you may want to deal with - but maybe not now.

Does he need a bit more space to settle? All 3 of mine really outgrew any assistance to settle round about this sort of age - and regained it later when they were more reasonable  .

Likewise the napping on the go has returned a bit. We went out to the zoo today, and he fell asleep in my sling about 1 hr after his usual nap. I transferred him to the buggy and he slept 1.5hrs  .

[michaeljacknnugg]

I did wonder about that, Liz.

His nights are better again now he's over the cough. Generally two feeds, and 11.5-12hrs.

I have learned today that he will still sleep on the go (phew!) but he has to have a good crack at it. No chopping and changing. We were at the farm putting up fences this morning and he just snuggled in and went to sleep in the sling at 9.15, which is the time he's most commonly gone to sleep this last week or so. Similarly he was tired by 1.30 and asleep in the buggy by 1.40.

Persist, for now?

[*Liz*]

I would I think. I've never had much luck with anything without being consistent for a while. Like you say - it's not like there are many other suitable routines for you guys anyway.

[michaeljacknnugg]

Yup, there's the rub. I think when we change again it will be a big jump to a long middle-of-the-day nap plus a catnap on the way home from school.

He's changed so much in just a few days. Properly crawling around now, sitting unaided, eating off a fork and diving in with his hands to a bowl of bits and pieces for lunch yesterday. It's no wonder their sleep goes off when they're doing all of that.

[*Liz*]

Funny how experience makes you notice the developmental stuff. T is a pain at night at the moment, but he is trying so hard to learn to talk (as well as finishing off a molar and a canine), and I am sure it is that  . But with J I would have been convinced it was my routine, yk?