Hello! I'm new and really need some help

[SuperCatCat]

Hi everyone, I'm hoping somebody will be able to advise me on a few problems that we have...

My son is three and a half months and we have found it difficult to encourage him to fall asleep on his own. He sleeps happily in his moses basket at night (but only if we put him down asleep or very close to it) and sleeps for 7 hours then another 2.5(ish) after a 3a.m.feed.
 The real issue is with daytime naps, he can only fall asleep in his pram or if I'm holding him and walking. It used to not bother me how he was napping as long as he was getting some kind of sleep. Unfortunately, as he's getting older, it's all going pear shaped he will only sleep in the pram for 30 minutes at most, and always wakes up the moment the movement stops. And now if he falls asleep with me holding and walking around the house, as soon as I stop moving he squirms and cries and wakes up. So I know I need to convince him now that his bed is the best place to nap but I don't know if I'm doing pick up put down right

We spent the first 40 minutes of naptime with him crying regardless of whether he was lying down or I was holding him. He'll only calm down if I start walking so I walked until he stopped crying and then put him down again but he started crying instantly and we did this over and over until he fell asleep the second I picked him up but began crying as soon as I put him down. Eventually he was so tired that I picked him up, he fell asleep, I put him down asleep and he slept for half an hour.
I feel like I've gone wrong, it's not teaching him to go to sleep but just wearing him out until he's so exhausted he can't keep his eyes open....
Please help me I don't know if I can go through again next nap time, it's heartbreaking xxx

[Scottishmummy]

Hello and welcome to BW.

I'm sorry you're having a hard time, short naps and nap refusal are very hard work. IM sure you've not done anything wrong, some babies are just harder to settle than others.

Could you post a typical day for you in EASY  format e.g.
Wake up 7
Eat : 7 (bottle or breast?)
A (time awake eyes open to eyes closed): 1.5 hrs
Sleep: 8.30-9.00
Etc etc
 
Could you also let me know of you're doing g any kind of wind down before the naptime?

I'll do my best to help if I can.
Xxx

[SuperCatCat]

Thank you so much as soon as I get a minute I'll type out our average day x

[SuperCatCat]

So our days can vary but it roughly goes like this:

6:30am wake up
7:00am Eat
7:20 - 8:30 Activity and wind down
8:30-9:15 Sleep (on me after pacing the bedroom)
9:15-10:00 try to get back to sleep, give up, nappy change
10:00 Eat
10:25-11:20 Activity
11:20-11:40 Sleep (in pram to and from shops)
11:40-1:00pm Activity
1:00pm Eat
1:20-2:50 Activity and wind down
2:50-3:30 sleep (on me after pacing bedroom)
4:00 eat
4:30-6:00 activity
6:00-7:00 Activity (bathtime and wind down)
7:00 Eat
7:30 Sleep (falls asleep having cuddle, transfer to moses basbasket and all is well)


This is an example of a not so great day, every now and then, he'll be so tired in the afternoon that I'm able to put him in his chair once asleep and get a good two hour nap from him. But it's very rare.

Also I have trouble seeing his tired cues recently. It seems like he can be awake and full of beans for up to three hours before I start to see him showing signs of sleepiness....

And lastly, when he wakes up from these short naps, he'll be upset for a minute but then full of beans again so I can't seem to get him to go back to sleep without a fight

Any insight would be greatly appreciated xx

[SuperCatCat]

Oh! And our wind down is:

Tidying things away (baby gym, etc)
Go upstairs
Close curtains
Put white noise on
Change nappy
Read Sleepy Kittens
Cuddle (while walking)
Sleep

[Scottishmummy]

Thanks for that.

His A times look a little long for his age. Have you tried putting him down for naps a slightly earlier? I wonder if the crying and difficulty settling might be from over tiredness? Below  are average A times and 2-3hrs would be typical for a baby of 4-6mo ... That said some go to 2hrs earlier than others...so it could be an independent sleep issue, or he might need a longer wind down.

Average A times- BOOKMARK ME!

But first  try doing naps slightly earlier (e.g. After 1hr30-45) and let me know how that goes.

Xxx

[SuperCatCat]

Ah thank you! If I start by trying 1hr30 would that include getting ready for nap? Winding down etc?
 I thought he might be awake too long but sometimes he's just so awake, I can't see any signs of sleepiness lol x

[Scottishmummy]

Yes - so to be asleep by 1hr30 means you need to start wind down around 15-20 mins earlier.

Sometimes babies get so interested in their environment and toys that they don't show signs of sleepiness until it's too late!

[SuperCatCat]

That makes sense thanks for your advice! I'll give it a go and hopefully we'll be able to have a nice calm sleepy time  and get more than a 30 minute nap x