Early BT struggle for 3 m.o.

[Iryna_B]

We've been struggling to establish an early Bedtime for my almost 3 m.o. daughter. Since birth she's been going to sleep at around 9 pm sometimes later. I've been trying to push it to 7-7.30 pm for awhile now but with no luck.
She has a consistent BT routine, but after I put her down, she would wake up after 30 or 40 minutes and want to play. If I'm lucky, I would rush into her room to nurse her back to sleep, but that trick doesn't always help.
She usually wakes up at 7 am and first 2 naps and the 4th nap are 45 minutes. Her 3rd nap is usually the longest 4-5 hours. It doesn't interfere with her night sleep so I don't wake her from such a long nap. But even when she didn't have this long nap, she would still have a late BT. At night, she wakes up 1 or 2 times, sometimes she sleep through.
Can someone advice me what should I do to move that BT earlier?

[Skadiver13]

I can see right away her 3rd nap is the issue 4-5 hrs is way too long and is indeed robbing her of her night sleep. She's just not tired enough and is treating that 730 BT as a cat nap. At this age I wouldn't personally let a baby nap more than 2.5hrs at a time. Although it may not be waking her in the middle of the night I have a feeling that is what is affecting BT. If you shorten that last nap I think you may find it much easier to put her down for BT earlier.

[Iryna_B]

Thank you for your reply!
I was also thinking that long nap might be an issue, but she started taking this long nap just recently. Before that her naps were on the shorter side and we would still have a bedtime battle.

[Skadiver13]

Could you post your routine in EASY format? I still think those long naps may be her playing catch up but may start to affect her more.

[Iryna_B]

Hi!
Here's our today's routine. I wrote from memory and I believe there was one feeding between first and second E, but I just can't remember the exact time. Usually she wakes up at 7-7.30, but today she woke up at 8. When she wakes up at 7-7.30, routine shifts 30 minutes back, but bedtime remains the same, approximately 9 pm.
She usually goes 3 - 3.5 hrs between feeds.

E, S 6.45
Wake time and A 8.00
S 9.20 (nap 40-45 mins)
Y

E 10.40
A
S 11.45 (nap 40-45 mins)
Y

E
A 12.30
E, S 14.00 (nap 3 hrs)
Y


E 17.00
A
S 18.15 (nap 30 mins)
Y

E
A 18.45
E 20.00
S 20.50

[Skadiver13]

I think your A time in the morning may be too short. Many 3 month olds are doing 1.5hrs at 3months. You could try pushing that out another 10min or so? Also is she going right back to sleep at that 645am wakeup/feeding? I think she may be UT for the first nap, then possibly OT for the second then crashes and plays catch up for the 3rd nap? Do you wake her after that 4th nap or does she wake herself after 30min? Is your routine any different on days she sleeps all the way through then days she wakes once or twice? Do you feed at those night wakings?

[Iryna_B]

So yesterday I gave her 1hr 30 mins A time in the morning and she did a 2 hrs nap followed by 3 short naps. It was really difficult to put her for 4rth nap which started at 6.30. I was wondering if I need to put her down for a nap after 6 pm? If she gets that late 4rth nap, BT is definitely shifting to not earlier than 9 pm. She usually wakes up herself after short 4rth nap.
At the early morning feeding she usually goes right back to sleep but has a long waking up process turning and tossing and making sounds. So it's difficult to tell when her wake up time exactly is.
I feed at night wakings. Although she gave me a good night sleep a couple times, very often she wakes up more often then I think she needs to and especially in the morning I'm so tired so I nurse her, because I'm afraid she'll start screaming and give me EW if I don't.

[Skadiver13]

So it sounds like the `1.5hr mark was good in the AM. How much A time after the good nap before the second nap? Also when you say short how short were they? As for the 4th nap, it's hard because I'm in the same boat. If my LO wakes at say 430 from her 3rd nap it's too long of an A to bedtime. She often fights that 4th nap really hard but if I can get it I keep it to no more than 30-40mins so she gets a break but not a full sleep cycle and she's easier to put to bed. So usually 6-6:30 then BT is 730/8. But my LO is not prone to OT so that works for us. But on days she doesn't take that last nap I just put her to bed slightly earlier but not too early.

I hear you about the EW I panic when I see her start to stir at like 6. With my oldest his favorite wake up time was 430 and he was consistent about it, you should have seen me all over these boards trying to figure it out. Sometimes we just need to go to with the flow or do what you need to do to get a better wake up time and it will sort itself out. Remember there is a huge sleep regression at 4 months so whatever we do now may just go right out the window. There is also a growth spurt so if she is taking full feeds at her wakings (and they are 3hrs or more apart) I would go ahead and feed her.