Not fair that mama hearing is super sensitive! I think a lot of us here find the same thing, that we hear every little cry and sigh whereas men can sleep through it and also go straight back to sleep if they do happen to hear it.
I think you're right though that you need to hang back a bit. It's totally normal for LOs to wake at night, and you definitely don't want to disturb their ability to put themselves back to sleep.
My DD2 used to be up for hours at night too. It was awful, so I sympathise! I used to go in, pat, lie on her floor, whatever I could, and nothing worked. Eventually what worked was as little intervention as possible with WIWO. No CIO or CC, but only going in when she was really upset, reassuring and leaving again when she was calm. She did immediately ramp up again when I left, but for a few seconds and would then stop, so I felt that she was more angry that I left than actually needing me. Gradually her NWs reduced and now she sleeps through barring illness.
Having said all that, I did get the feeling that she was very susceptible to being disrupted by teeth and developmental stuff. So it was a rough few months while she learnt to crawl, stand, walk, tall etc. It could just be that she sleeps better now that her brain and body aren't quite so busy all the time. Well... she is always busy but has mastered all the basics and has all her teeth!
Good luck, I hope you continue to see improvement.