Naps - waking after 20 - 45mins. Help!

[Ailasmum]

Hello.

Looking for some help.

My LO is 17 weeks and has always been a horrible napper. Up until recently she would only nap in the sling or whilst being held and if I tried to put her down she would wake up crying. At bedtime I was rocking her to sleep. I really want to teach her to fall asleep by herself so have started using shush-pat for both naps and bedtime. I'm surprised how well it works, napping in the cot at all even if it's a short period is a massive step forward for us.

She goes down for naps with a little crying and is usually asleep with the help of shush- pat in between 5 - 15mins. The problem with naps is she wakes up anywhere between 20 - 45mins and I can't always get her to fall back asleep. At bedtime she occasionally wakes after 30mins of going down but this has been happening less recently. She is still waking for one or two feeds during the night which I'm am hoping to cut out down soon.

Could someone take a look at our routine and see if it needs tweaking? I was hoping to get her on to a 4 hour EASY routine but the short naps are making it difficult. Am I keeping her awake too long? I watch for signs of tiredness but they are really difficult to pick up on. By the time it gets to the evening she is usually fussy and I'm putting this down to her being over tired. I should also mention she is still swaddled and she goes for naps in a darkened room.

Also with the shush-pat I keep going till she's asleep and then keep my hand on her chest for another 10mins. Is this too long, is this creating a bad habit? This is only day 4 of using shush-pat.

The last 2 days have looked like this.

E: 7:00
A: 7:20 - 9:00
S: 9:00 (15mins shush-pat to fall asleep) - 10:00. 25mins shush-pat but wouldn't go back to sleep. Nap total 45mins
E: 10:30
A: 10:50 - 12:00 (but woke from nap at 10:00)
S: 12:00 (5mins shush-pat to fall asleep) - 12:45. 20mins shush-pat to get her back to sleep. Nap total 1hr 50mins
E: 14:20
A: 14:40 - 16:20
S: 16:20 (5mins shush-pat to fall asleep) - 16:50. Nap total 25mins
E: 17:20 - small feed to last till bedtime
A: 17:25 - 19:05 (but woke from nap 16:50)
Bath and massage 18:15
E: 18:40
S: 19:05 (5mins to fall asleep)

Nightime
Woke at 23:00 shush-pat back to sleep
Woke at 1:00 and fed
Woke at 4:30 and fed. Tried for 25mins to get her back to sleep before feeding.

E: 7:35 (wouldn't take a full feed as fed at 5:00)
A: 7:50 - 9:25
S: 9:25 (10mins shush-pat to fall asleep) - 10:05. 25mins shush-pat but wouldn't go back to sleep. Nap total 30mins
E: 10:30
A: 10:50 - 11:50 (but woke from nap at 10:00)
S: 11:50 (10mins shush-pat to fall asleep) - 12:30. 5mins shush-pat to go back to sleep. Nap total 1hr 30mins
E: 13:40
A: 13:55 - 15:25
S: 15:25 (20mins shush-pat to fall asleep) - 16:30. Wouldn't go back to sleep. Nap total 45mins
E: 16:40
A: 16:55 - 19:15
Bath and massage 18:15
E: 18:45
S: 19:15 (5mins to fall asleep)

Nightime
Woke 12:40 and fed
Woke 4:20 and fed at 4:30. Didn't go back to sleep till 06:10

[Ailasmum]

Does anyone have any advice? I could really do with some help.

[lolsyb1982]

Hi there and welcome 

The average awake time for a 4 month old is around1hr45/2 hours which looks like you're aiming for. Short naps are a real problem around this age as many LO cannot transition between sleep cycles and need help. With that morning nap of 45 mins do you try to resettle? How is her mood when she wakes? You could try pushing the A just a touch more to see if she sleeps longer.

Seems like your 2nd nap is pretty good so I don't think anything needs to change there at the moment. I think if you get a longer first nap and the second remains as is the 3rd nap is ok to be a short one. Must start to drop that one at around 5/6 months.

With regards to your ssh pat question it's fine to keep a hand on her until she falls into a deeper sleep.

Onto NW - it's pretty normal for this age to still wake once or twice for a feed. She could be genuinely hungry at the 4am wu and so if feeding usually settles her I would continue.

Hope some of that helps but come back with any other questions you have x

[Ailasmum]

Thanks for your response. If she wakes early I always try for up to 25mins to get her back down, this often makes her quite mad! If this doesn't work I get her up. She's usually in a good mood even if it's been a short nap and as soon as I unswaddle her she's all smiles.

One question, if she only naps for 30mins, should I make her next awake period much shorter, say 1 hour? Or should I stick to the 1.45 - 2 hours? Is there anything else I can do to help her transition between sleep cycles?

I tried today with awake periods of both 2 hours and 1.45 but it didn't make much difference. I'll keep playing round with it in the hope I find the magic combination.

On the plus side she went down super easily for bed tonight. 2mins of shush-pat and she was asleep, if only naps were so easy!

[lolsyb1982]

If she does a 30 min nap I would bring her next A forward by maybe 15mins, 30 max.  Again it's trial and error to get the right time! If you put down to early you are then likely to get a short nap and then the OT just builds up

[Ailasmum]

I'll try that and see how it works.

Do you know when babies usually grow out of these short naps and inability to link sleep cycles?

[lolsyb1982]

Usually around the 6 month mark. My dd2 couldn't until she was 7 months.

[ireneasheard]

Just wanted to add - the night waking looks like around the same times.... would be looking to not feed back to sleep if possible as it seems habitual?