Author Topic: 3yr old coming to our bed since new baby - any tips?  (Read 357 times)

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Offline Kst33

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3yr old coming to our bed since new baby - any tips?
« on: October 12, 2016, 08:58:21 am »
Hi,

Just wondered if anyone had some tips on how I might handle this one.

We've got a very new baby - 12 days old and for the last 2 nights my 3 year old has come into our bed at 2am ish and won't go back to his own room.

Pre-baby - if he ever did this, which wasn't very often, we'd just walk him back to his room and sit there for a few mins and all was good.

But the first time he came in after baby, he started getting upset when back in his room, then the baby started getting upset as he was in the middle of feeding and really struggling with wind - and I didn't have it in me to follow though and make him stay and cope with 2 crying children! So I know I've got it wrong....but not sure what to do now.

It doesn't really bother me him coming in apart from knowing it's going to be hard to break later and he's also not getting great sleep as the baby then keeps waking him for the rest of the night - so he's getting tired.

I absolutely get it - I've got a co-sleeper thing, so it looks to him like the baby is in bed with me and he wants to be. He's also a very very sensitive lad who doesn't handle change particularly well. But so far he seems to have handled the new arrival really well so I'm conscious that I don't want to handle this in the wrong way and create bigger problems.

Hubbie is currently sleeping downstairs so he's ok for work - so I don't really want to have to disturb him if I don't have to.

I could just roll with it - and hope the novelty wears off soon (also doing the reinforcement during the day that he needs his sleep - won't sleep well in with baby etc). Maybe that's a bit too hopeful of me though!

Any tips would be massively appreciated.

Many thanks,

Karen

Offline MJ&N

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Re: 3yr old coming to our bed since new baby - any tips?
« Reply #1 on: October 12, 2016, 09:16:54 am »
We had similar with our 8yo, and went with it...occasionally he slept in with hubby but we also set up a ready bed on the floor and made it clear that he was welcome any time.

Need fulfilled....need faded and he sleeps fine on his own. Apart from when hubby's away, and then sometimes he will come in with me.
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Offline Kst33

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Re: 3yr old coming to our bed since new baby - any tips?
« Reply #2 on: October 13, 2016, 11:48:54 am »
Thanks for the reassurance - good to know it doesn't necessarily mean I'm opening a can of worms to deal with in the future!

I'll just go with it for a while and see where we're all at in a few weeks. :-)

Thanks again.