Is 2 years old too early to give up nap?

[hayleystar]

Hi everyone, I need to call on your wonderful advice again!

My daughter is turning two next week. For the past three months we have had trouble getting her to go to sleep for naps and at bed time. She has gotten used to me sitting patting her or holding her hand while she goes to sleep. This was fine until it was taking her an hour to go to sleep.  So I tried using walk in walk out but she became hysterical and vomited, she wouldn't calm down at all even with me walking out and straight back in.  So I tried gradual withdrawl, I got to sitting a metre or so away from the cot but she just plays and rolls around. She asks for drinks, pretends she's done a poo so I have to change her nappy etc 😡 All this results in a lot of frustration from me.

We have tried to shorten her naps to 40 minutes but she still takes ages to sleep at bedtime.  A few times where she has not napped she will go to bed at 6pm and fall asleep within 10 minutes. She's pretty good during the day, just a bit tired in late afternoon. The problem is on these days where she doesn't nap, she wakes a lot in the night (overtiredness??) so what I'm wondering, is would this night waking continue if I cut her naps, or would she get used to not napping and not be so overtired? Or should I continue with trying to get her to nap?

Currently she wakes around 6/6.30
I start the nap at 12.30
Bedtime 7.30, we have tried earlier and later but it doesn't make a difference.

[Haribo2012]

Hi there it's not unheard of to drop naps at this age but it is quite young, I'd probably say it's a combination of OT and developmental as they do have shenanigans around birthdays.
The nw could be OT or are her 2 year molars through?
Do she show any tired signs before 12.30? I have known LOs to take an earlier nap then like a long stretch to BT or alternatively give a CN later on - we had to do a buggyvwalk ir car ride at this age to a pop a nap so I timed it with going to the shops etc it didn't last long and nap returned.

[Martini~]

How long is she napping now? I also would say it's early for nap dropping and being honest if she shows OT signs just after one NND it probably would only go worse with more days like that.

What I would consider is:
- capping nap - it usually takes couple of days or even week or two until they adjust their bedtime and statt sleeping longer at night
- pushing BT slightly so settling is easier
- doing very occasional NND but if 6pm was too late for her you should consider even earlier BT; usually after a NND they need a catch up of sleep during next 1/2/3 or more days so you should see some improvement in her settling next days and when she is rested you may go for another NND

And I totally second what Haribo says that around 2 they have developmental leap so she may need more sleep soon. However if it already last 2 months ... not much will change. I would also try all of the above mentioned changes from checking if this is not OT which prevents her from a good night sleep. We did have a period before 2yo where DS was sleeping 1:15-1:30 (from 18mo till 22) and his sleep at night was great (I was capping nap at 1:30 after 18mo sleep regression). And from 22mo his sleep went down. It lasted 2months, I capped nap to 1h, even to 45min for 3-4 days once - but there was no improvement. And around 2yo I just let him sleep on a nap as much as he wanted. And it occurred it worked. From 24mo he started and needed 1.5-2h of sleep daytime until around 2y5m and really less made him OT.

[hayleystar]

I have capped her nap at one hour, perhaps I should try 40 minutes? She gets very upset for a few hours after I wake her, I really hate doing it. And so far it doesn't help her settle.
So I should try and keep the nap going? I hate sitting with her for an hour or more to get her to sleep, but I don't want her night sleep to get worse

[creations]

Currently she wakes around 6/6.30
I start the nap at 12.30
Bedtime 7.30, we have tried earlier and later but it doesn't make a difference.

I agree with all the others have said but wanted to add another view too.  Mine needed a later nap, later BT and a shorter night to get through the period from 2yo to 2.5yo when he dropped his nap.  I did try capping the nap, it was awful, he didn't come around from his bad mood until just before BT so the entire afternoon was terrible for us both. some LOs have a relatively quick recovery after the nap is capped, others (mine) just don't recover.  I also tried NNDs (a few months older than your LO though) and these were also a big fail for my DS, although he resisted naps he was tired to the point of dangerous by 4pm without a nap and I couldn't put him to bed at 4pm every day.  The answer for us was to keep the longer nap and accept the shorter night.
Our nap gradually moved later, the latest it went was 2-4pm with 8pm BT (when really bad it was 8.30/9pm BT but that was a very short while, the 2-4 with 8pm BT was a very settled routine for a good amount of time).  I'm not saying this is the routine you should move to, just giving another example of what works for some.
If it was me I'd move the nap 30 min later and BT 30 min later too. And see if she is more willing to go to sleep without an hour sitting in her room.

Another important aspect for us was the amount of physical activity. He really needed it. I did what I could to increase physical activity through the day, setting some heavy lifting jobs (carrying canned food from a basket to the kitchen or carrying bottles of craft paint from one room to another as a fun activity), going to the play park for running and climbing etc. And we introduced a pre-BT "toddler band" activity. We would choose an instrument and march from the living room around the room, down the hall, into the kitchen and back singing "we are the toddler band" and playing our instruments, then we'd switch instruments and go again, and again. DS would often end up jogging too.  Even setting up a basket of toys in one room and sitting in another asking him to run and fetch the red car bring it back, now the blue car bring it back etc. Anything to get him properly physically tired.

hope this helps some

[ele]

I would agree with trying to focus not so much on capping naps but on perhaps making the nap a bit later (trying to increase time by 15 min till getting her to nap is easier) and then also by small increments delay BT if necessary. perhaps not later than 8:30.
for us capping naps has been always the most disrupting choice ( bad mood, serious OT).
may be trying to make her bed routine more strict but fun, something that makes her feel positive ( the other comment of excercise before BT is also a positive one). let her bring her favorite toy to sleep with her and tell her how tired the toy is and how she needs your daughters help). let her feel a bit adult like but also more relaxed about it. but then also gradually allow less compromises where unnecesary (asking for the fifth cup of water to delay bed time etc)
2 years is such a big developmental stage... those wonder weeks are back with revenge... but the outcome is a wonderful bigger more independent baby girl. best of luck in trying to keep those naps. I see so many OT babies who are allowed to drop them early.