Author Topic: 8mo EW - do I do set naptimes?  (Read 744 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline channy13

  • New & Learning The Ropes
  • *
  • Showing Appreciation 0
  • Posts: 25
  • Location:
8mo EW - do I do set naptimes?
« on: December 04, 2016, 19:54:52 pm »
I'm back for the third (or fourth?) time for DD2 sleep issues!  :-\

DD2 is 8 months old next week, and we've been having a much harder time with sleep than DD1 did! (and here I thought having already done this once that it would be easier the second time around...)

I feel like DD2 has lower sleep needs because she'll generally go 10.5 hrs at night (give or take 30 min), and nap 3-3.5 hrs during the day. A times are about 3hr - 3hr 15min, so her total A time (9hr 15min) isn't quite long enough to cover a 24 hour day when she gets 13.5 hrs of sleep...she's about an hour short! This leads to some good days, followed by some bad days/nights...it's a cycle that I can't break! If we're out and about, sometimes she'll catch 5-10 min in the car and that'll help extend an A time enough so that we'll get a later nap and the ideal 8pm BT. Problem days are when she wakes up from her last nap before 4:30pm...with an A time of 3 hr at the end of the day, that means EBT of 7:30pm...and usually an EW before 6:30am (I'd like 12 hrs at night, but I don't think that's her style!)...which then throws the day off because then it'll lead to another EBT and and even earlier EW the next day!

Any suggestions on how to ride this out until her A times can stretch out? Do I go with set nap times, regardless of the EW? I've tried stretching some A times, and that's led to short naps...another wrench in the regular routine!

Offline jessmum46

  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 411
  • Posts: 14235
  • Location: UK
Re: 8mo EW - do I do set naptimes?
« Reply #1 on: December 05, 2016, 13:26:20 pm »
Ha!  Do you know how many times I told DH with both of mine that we needed a 23h day?! ;D  So true....

It doesn't sound like she is super low sleep needs as she is getting a fair amount of sleep in total - perhaps not a high sleep needs baby though :)  She could well be one who prefers a shorter night and more of her sleep in naps - my DS is very much that way whereas DD was completely the opposite - had about 1.5-2h daytime sleep at 8 months but a good 12h night or more sometimes. 

I think there are two ways of looking at it really - one is just to ride it out, accepting the cycle of good and bad days, and look forward to getting to one nap in the next 6 months or so.  I found with both of mine there was much more stability once we got there, and it was easier to set a nap time at that age.  The other option is to try a set nap(s) which at least may stop your day getting too much earlier and gives you some predictability - though I will say it does not mean every day will be the same!  Mainly the stability comes from knowing when the nap will happen, but the length can vary from day to day. 

Some people have had success with setting the first nap, then being a little more flexible about the second depending on how the first one went.  In order to set the nap you basically work from ideal WU time (7am?) and set your nap based on a typical A time.  So maybe nap at 10/10.15am.  For it to work you ideally want to leave LO in bed until ideal WU time so that they can handle the first A time ok even if they wake a touch early.  If LO is clearly tired or wakes very early you can pull the nap earlier by 15 mins or so - but any more really isn't 'set'. 

Be aware that often older babies and angel/textbook types deal with set naps better than younger babies or those with a touchy/spirited streak.  We would generally suggest to use A times at this age - but I do think set naps can be very helpful for some and certainly worth a try.

What do you think?
***Katherine***







Offline channy13

  • New & Learning The Ropes
  • *
  • Showing Appreciation 0
  • Posts: 25
  • Location:
Re: 8mo EW - do I do set naptimes?
« Reply #2 on: December 06, 2016, 01:51:06 am »
Ah, I didn't know set naps work better with angel/textbook types. DD2 is touchy/spirited, so it might just make things worse... Guess this means I`ll just need to ride it out until her A times stretch out and then look forward to dropping down to 1 nap (6 months seems a looooong way away!)

Do you have any suggestions on what to do on days with EW or a short nap (I'm talking 30-40min and won't resettle) to avoid a super early BT? We tried taking her for a ride in the car over the weekend at around 5:30pm to get a quick catnap in, but that didn't work at all! Ironic, given that she'll fall asleep in the car 2 hours into A time before naps earlier in the day...

Offline jessmum46

  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 411
  • Posts: 14235
  • Location: UK
Re: 8mo EW - do I do set naptimes?
« Reply #3 on: December 06, 2016, 08:14:18 am »
With an EW I would leave LO in bed as long as you possibly can, and then try for nap time as close to usual time as you can get.  I had to spend some mornings on the floor in DSs room to keep him quiet until a reasonable WU time but it did help stop the morning nap getting too early.  If LO is OT going for the nap you may have more chance of resettling - at least that's what I tended to find.

Short naps are tricky.....I don't know if you've ever tried a super-EBT but sometimes they can work amazingly!  The idea is if you get LO to bed before they are OT then hopefully they should sleep longer, rather than going later and LO only does a (typically OT) 10.5h night.  If her norm is 10.5h the idea would be that if you went for bed at 6pm (say), then she would wake at 4.30am and her body clock would eventually allow her to resettle because she knows that's not morning.

Other than that there's not a lot you can do really other than to start stretching her A times a bit (3h-3h15 is on the shorter side for some at 8 months) and just muddle through as best you can.  At this age I wouldn't bother trying for the third catnap - she's really too old for it now.  Better to get your day stretched out from the start by gently pushing A time every few days which means that the short naps really don't matter so much x
***Katherine***







Offline channy13

  • New & Learning The Ropes
  • *
  • Showing Appreciation 0
  • Posts: 25
  • Location:
Re: 8mo EW - do I do set naptimes?
« Reply #4 on: December 21, 2016, 20:02:17 pm »
Gah, rough week with both kids sick. Now that the baby is better, the EW have gotten earlier (6am versus 630), which has translated to EBT of 730, and with only 10.5 hrs of sleep, back to 6am EW! How do i get out of this loop?

She also used to have morning naps of at least 1.5-2hrs, and afternoon naps of 1.5 (usually had to cap to preserve BT) but recently, both naps have dropped to 1-1.5 hrs. Is this a sign of UT? I've stretched morning A to 3hr15 min and afternoon A to 3.5hr... But with the EW and short nap (1hr10 min), it's been tough to stretch more. Should I just push more?

Offline jessmum46

  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 411
  • Posts: 14235
  • Location: UK
Re: 8mo EW - do I do set naptimes?
« Reply #5 on: December 21, 2016, 20:49:59 pm »
Can you post a few days of her EASY for us?
***Katherine***







Offline channy13

  • New & Learning The Ropes
  • *
  • Showing Appreciation 0
  • Posts: 25
  • Location:
Re: 8mo EW - do I do set naptimes?
« Reply #6 on: December 21, 2016, 21:40:18 pm »
BF 4x a day (wake up, after nap 1, before nap 2, bt)
solids 3x a day (breakfast 2hrs after wake up, lunch 1 hr after nap 1, dinner after nap 2)

Fri:
0635 - wake
0850-855 - fell asleep in car during school run
1010-1135 - nap 1
1500-1610 - nap 2
1920 - asleep for night

Sat:
0630 - wake (slept over 11 hrs!)
0945-1110 - nap 1
1405-1410 - fell asleep in car
1516-1715 - nap 2
2035 - asleep for night

Sun:
0615 - awake
0930-1105 - nap 1
1410-1415 - asleep in car
1510-1620 - nap 2
1625-1700 - resettled nap 2 in rocker
2015 - asleep for night

Mon:
0620 - awake
0945-1125 - nap 1
1450-1610 - nap 2
1620-1630 - resettled for another 10 min in rocker
1940 - asleep for night

Tues:
0555 - awake.. husband resettled in rocker until 0635
0955 - 1130 - nap 1
1500-1625 - nap 2
1935 - asleep for night

woke up this morning at 0600


Is it unrealistic to aim for 8pm-6:30am (ideally 7am, but I don't think that's DD2's style...)? And to get 1x 2 hr nap and 1x 1.5 hr nap? Would you suggest putting her down later to get the ideal 7am WU time? I realize now that DD1 was/is a great sleeper...she used to do 12 hrs overnight at this age, plus 2 1.5-2 hrs naps!
« Last Edit: December 23, 2016, 20:21:37 pm by channy13 »

Offline jessmum46

  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 411
  • Posts: 14235
  • Location: UK
Re: 8mo EW - do I do set naptimes?
« Reply #7 on: December 28, 2016, 13:40:00 pm »
Is it unrealistic to aim for 8pm-6:30am (ideally 7am, but I don't think that's DD2's style...)? And to get 1x 2 hr nap and 1x 1.5 hr nap?
Honestly, yes I think that's a bit unrealistic for most LOs this age.  I would suggest that it would be more usual to have (as a maximum) two 1.5h naps and more likely one nap of 1.5-2h and a shorter one (an hour or less) - i.e. no more than 3h daytime sleep.  More will probably eat into her night - you may find with less day sleep she will actually sleep closer to 7am with an 8pm bedtime. 

Would you suggest putting her down later to get the ideal 7am WU time?
I certainly wouldn't aim for any less than 11h at night, sometimes she may wake early but if you're only aiming for 10.5h then the night gets short and EWs really do start to be problematic.  I would stick with no later than 8pm. 

Looking at your EASY those little car naps are probably not helping hugely, it does make it rather hard to tell what she needs.  Can you try to keep her awake or avoid times where she is likely to doze where possible?
***Katherine***







Offline channy13

  • New & Learning The Ropes
  • *
  • Showing Appreciation 0
  • Posts: 25
  • Location:
Re: 8mo EW - do I do set naptimes?
« Reply #8 on: December 28, 2016, 23:25:56 pm »
Happy Holidays!

Ok, thanks for the suggestions regarding nap lengths...I'll readjust my expectations so I'm not so frustrated when it seems like she's not sleeping long enough.

Re: car naps. The morning one is usually during the school run for DD1, so there's no avoiding that car ride. I do my best to keep her up, keeping the temp cool in the car and singing songs, but I"m only successful about 75% of the time.

I've gotten a few 545am EWs in the last week, and half the time she's had a BM, so after changing her, it's pretty much impossible to resettle. I've stretched A times to 3hr30min in the morning and am working on getting the afternoon A time to 3hr45min. With a morning nap of 1.5 hr and an afternoon nap of 1hr 10min - 30min...what would you suggest for A time before BT? I think that's where I'm struggling...I've been doing 3hr15min, give or take 10min, but night sleeps are still around 10hrs...sometimes 9.5hrs!
« Last Edit: December 29, 2016, 01:27:15 am by channy13 »

Offline jessmum46

  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 411
  • Posts: 14235
  • Location: UK
Re: 8mo EW - do I do set naptimes?
« Reply #9 on: December 30, 2016, 14:20:37 pm »
Probably about 3h?  It's a bit of guess-work though....remind me, is she an independent sleeper?

Those EW poos are so annoying!!
***Katherine***







Offline channy13

  • New & Learning The Ropes
  • *
  • Showing Appreciation 0
  • Posts: 25
  • Location:
Re: 8mo EW - do I do set naptimes?
« Reply #10 on: December 30, 2016, 15:49:18 pm »
Yep, independent sleeper. Quick wind down with a song and then into the crib awake with her blankie. She usually falls asleep within 5 min for naps, but takes up to 20 min at night.

Offline jessmum46

  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 411
  • Posts: 14235
  • Location: UK
Re: 8mo EW - do I do set naptimes?
« Reply #11 on: January 08, 2017, 19:48:52 pm »
How's things now the holiday season is over?
***Katherine***







Offline channy13

  • New & Learning The Ropes
  • *
  • Showing Appreciation 0
  • Posts: 25
  • Location:
Re: 8mo EW - do I do set naptimes?
« Reply #12 on: January 10, 2017, 01:59:34 am »
School just started for us today, so finally back to our regular routine. The last week of holidays went quite well - A times of 3.5 hrs, 3.75 hrs and 3 hrs before BT. Naps ranged from 1.25-1.5 both morning and afternoon. Night sleep anywhere from 10.25 to 10.75 (10 hr 45 min...the longest yet!) I think she just might not be an 11hr/night kind of kid :( :( DH was off and no school run, so there wasn't any noise in the mornings to wake her, and still she'd wake up usually 10.5 hrs after going to sleep.

How do you know when to stretch out A times? 9 months old this week!

Offline jessmum46

  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 411
  • Posts: 14235
  • Location: UK
Re: 8mo EW - do I do set naptimes?
« Reply #13 on: January 10, 2017, 16:52:03 pm »
Usually short naps and/or happy EWs/nap or BT resistance are all reasons to try an increased A time x
***Katherine***