2-1 Transition Nap Help

[AshleyMegan]

40 minutes and she wakes up screaming again.  I'm at a loss.  I put her down at 12:15 for her nap

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A 40m in nap rather than 1hr 20?

[AshleyMegan]

Yes  😞

[AshleyMegan]

I'm wondering if I should just go back to the drawing board and put her down for a nap at 11:30 (I know she'll only sleep for 40 minutes...) and then go back to attempting  another nap from 3:30-5 (which is what she was doing in the past)?

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Maybe 
I think you were finding it hard to get her down for the second nap though weren't you?  so it can still be very hard.
Chopping and changing doesn't help her settle into a routine - but one 40 min nap in the day clearly isn't helpful either.


I think I'd be tempted to continue the midday nap for a week to see if it settles down more but if you think going back to 2 naps is the way to go then sure try it - after all you are with her and know her best, I am only looking at times on a screen.

Here either way, whatever you decide to try x

[AshleyMegan]

Thank you so much!  They really are hard to read at times.  The reason I started thinking 2 naps was the way to do it again is because when we are out and about she is almost asleep at 11:30.   She slept for 40 minutes then.  And I put her down at 4pm for a second nap and I had to wake her up at 5:20.  Hmmm.


But on the other hand, I could not get her to sleep yesterday until 2:15...😣  She was fighting it beforehand.  She then scrwamed 40 minutes into her nap, and fell back asleep until 4;50.  Oh brother...

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I found the 2-1 a difficult nap drop.  I had to really stick to a routine and force my DS to sleep long enough. I know it's no practical help to you but at least you know you aren't the only one to have a tricky time of this x

[AshleyMegan]

Thank you  
I took your advice and still tried for the 1 nap.  And I'm so glad I did!  The past 2 days, she has made it through the sleep cycle!!  She must wake slightly, but can put herself back to sleep  (I can hear her sucking on her fingers, lol).  Yesterday she woke screaming at 1 hour 20 minutes into it, but at least had a decent amount of sleep to get her to bedtime. 

Today, she did the same thing at 40 minutes.  At 1 hour 20 minutes, she woke up, whimpered, walked around her crib, laid back down and is still trying to fall back asleep (singing to herself periodically- besides that, she's silent). 
How long would you allow her to try to fall back alseep before getting her up?

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it's a shame she can't manage that third sleep cycle to get to 2hrs as it does sound like she needs it - but I think you have tried a later nap to make her more tired and it didn't help with the transition so really now I think it is just a case of going with what she can do and accepting the 1hr 20 mins...you never know it might extend to 2hrs in a week or two as sometimes the change in routine makes for shorter napping than they need but gradually they relax into it. let's hope so.
As for when to get her up - if she regularly wakes at 1hr 20 and then spends a long time getting up, walking, laying down again but never falling to sleep then I'd probably just go in and get her up, as soon as she wakes or 5-10 mins after rather than leaving her getting frustrated about not being able to get back to sleep.  I'll give an example of my own DS, it's a slightly different thing but it perhaps helps to know, Tracy said if they are mantra crying leave them, and that falling to sleep can take 20 mins but when I put my DS down for the night or a nap I knew that if his mantra went on for more than say 5 mins he needed help, there was no point waiting longer.  The days I did wait longer he'd mantra for an hour and then scream so he missed out on an hours sleep or more.  I knew if I just went back in and helped him a little he'd get to sleep on time and was still independent, IMO there was always a reason for him needing an little extra help on those days.  So in terms of leaving a LO who is not doing an "I need you cry" yeah you can leave them, they are not in distress, but equally if you know a bit of help or just getting her up would reduce the amount of time/frustration then you might as well do it rather than waiting an hour or so.
I could be wrong here but maybe you can ask her - "do you want to get up?" and hold out your arms in invitation to be picked up and see what she does?

One more thing - if she continues to do 1hr 20 nap regardless of what time it is at, I would suggest just putting it at a reasonable time so that she is not too grouchy waiting for it, but also doesn't leave too long an A time before BT (basing the expectation on 1hr 20 not 2hr nap) to even her day up as much as you can.  The A times do not need to be equal, some LOs like a much longer first A time and some like a much longer second A time so you judge where is best for her and set it at that time daily.

hope this helps

[AshleyMegan]

Thank you very much.  I think I just have to keep doing what I'm doing I suppose....with no change in anything, we just started doing 40 minute naps again. 

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Oh dear. Not good hey.

Are you trying meds before nap?
I know you said she's a light sleeper and W2S isn't successful but have you tried consistently doing W2S for each 40 min cycle, going in at 30 mins and putting a hand on her to see her through?  It's the only thing I can think of to help improve her nap length.  I had to go in every 20 mins for my DS when he dropped to 1 nap, well I went in at 19 mins and put a hand on him, firm with a slight rocking motion, until say 21 mins then left, I kept going until he had 2hrs nap. It was the only way to get him to do the 2hrs even though prior to nap drop he'd been doing a predictable long nap for ages.
If you can get her into the habit she'll start to do it alone.

hugs, must be exhausting for you right now.

[AshleyMegan]

Ok....thought I'd update you.

2 days ago, at 11:30, she seemed  very tired and kept going to her room, pointing to her crib.  I put her down for a nap then.
40 minutes later, she woke (as expected, but not AS cranky as before), and I was sure she'd fight the second nap.  I figured I may as well try the 2nd nap.  Come 3 or 3:30 pm (I can't remember which, lol), I put her down, and she slept, and slept.  She didn't even wake at the 40 minute mark. 

I had to wake her up by 5 to make sure she got to bed on time.  Should I continue this schedule?  This seems really late for a 2nd nap...

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2 days ago, at 11:30, she seemed  very tired and kept going to her room, pointing to her crib.

Oh that's just too cute!!

It does seem very late for a second nap - how did BT and the night go that night?
If that was two days back what did you do the next day, 2 naps again? Go well?  Just wondering if she only wanted it as a one off to catch up as you did say about a month ago that she was still doing 2 naps a couple of days per week.  It could just be that for now she would do well on a mix of 2 and 1 nap days.
Some LOs are okay with that. Not mine, he  needed every day the same so he knew what was going on but yours is asking for a nap, so I would have put her down too!

[AshleyMegan]

She never seems to have an issue with BT, thankfully. 

It's just frustrating that we're all over the place and have such a late 2nd nap.

Her 1st nap has been kept at 11:30, and still only sleeps for 40 minutes.  But that pushes the second nap so late.   I'm wondering if I should try putting her down even  earlier for her first nap?  😣  I feel like I'm starting over completely!

Yesterday I tried a 1 nap day because she didn't seem tired one bit...so I put her down at 12:30 after lunch, but it was a 35 minute nap and even harder to fit the 2nd nap in

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If you want to continue with 2 naps how about capping the first at 20-30 mins rather than a full 40? and go for the longer afternoon nap instead?  What do you think?