4 MO waking every 2-3 hours at night and babbling

[Fenner12]

Hi my little one is 4 months old and waking every 2 to 3 hours at night and sometimes he whines and then he babbles. He can be awake any where between 1-2 hours. Most of the time it takes a lot for him to get back to sleep. I have tried nursing and sometimes he eats and sometimes he doesn't. He gets a total of 6 to more than 8 hours of sleep at night and it is broken up in a 12 hour time span. I would say last night was probably one of the worst nights. He got a total of 6 hours of sleep and throughout the day today, he has spent most of day time asleep. I am worried that he is going to get his nights and days mixed up.

To make things more tiring,... After our whole bedtime routine, he goes to sleep pretty quick but he wakes up after 30 mins to an hour then spends the next 2 hours off and on crying, pulling out his passie, crying some more then he will finally go to sleep. Since he was 2 months, we started the whole cry for 5 go up and help sooth if he wakes again we go to 10 mins and so on.

He doesnt seem to get it. Its the same thing over and over again. Wouldn't you think he would understand now? Am I going crazy? At the beginning of February, we think he hit his sleep regression and not sure if this is still apart of it but what he went through a month ago, is different now.

I am a momma that just wants my baby to sleep again. He was sleeping 4-8 hours stretches wanted to nurse and back to sleep he went. We are about to go crazy and almost at wits end. I have 4 dogs and I feel bad for them bc I want nothing to do with them. Everything they do gets under my skin bc I am so tired and just want quite and sleep.

Please help with any advice or experiences that you have had. 

[Katet]

Since he was 2 months, we started the whole cry for 5 go up and help sooth if he wakes again we go to 10 mins and so on.

He doesnt seem to get it. Its the same thing over and over again. Wouldn't you think he would understand now? Am I going crazy?

Firstly Controlled Crying is not a method supported by BW  - Research on why 'cry it out' and 'controlled crying' is NOT recommended!
http://www.kidspot.com.au/baby/baby-care/baby-sleep-and-settling/the-con-of-controlled-crying
& TBH I can't understand how a baby who's 4mo can "get" anything, certainly if they can't tell the time how can they work out that parents will be back at longer & longer periods & I do think it's counterproductive because it breaks trust.  Certainly where my DH works (he's an accountant for a charity that's whole function is for baby sleep & settling issues) & they 'out dated" Controlled crying more than a decade ago when research showed it only had about a 2 week time period for improved sleep.

I think with the night wakings & the longer day sleep it would be that you aren't keeping your baby awake long enough in the day & so he isn't tired enough at night. If he's like my DS2 who was LSN then you may well need to extend his awake time, I think it's around 4mo that a baby is around 2 hours awake & 2 hours asleep, but he could well be needing 2.5hours to be tired enough to sleep longer at night.  At 4mo you'd expect 4-5 hours (max) day sleep so anything more than that would be robbing from night sleep.

[ginger428]

Hi Fenner,
Welcome to baby whisperer!! Hang in there and remember you're not alone in this. I hope this community can support you and guide you to baby whispering.

This stage is so tough.  They have a sleep "progression" at 4 mo along with sleep need changes (less day sleep, dropping from 4-3 naps as they near 5-6 months), and it drove me crazy too... my son woke every 30 mins it seemed no matter his day sleep. I bet your son is in a cycle where he's so exhausted from the night that he may have transferred to day but like Kate said, it will help if you cap his day sleep right away.

Could you post your typical day with times? Like this?
E- (eat) 7am
A- (activity)
S- (sleep) nap, 9:30-11:00
E- 11:00
A-
S- 1:30-3:30


We should also address how you are putting him down to sleep during the day. Is he able to fall asleep independently at all? Also, figure out which of the night feeds he actually eats and ONLY feed at that time from now on and no less than 4 hrs apart. For the other wakings, go in to settle him right away when he cries and try PU/PD which is described in the link for SLEEP below. We'll figure out a way to help your baby sleep without leaving him alone. Please remember that babies can't "get it". In efforts to help them sleep, we can stress them further and break their trust which makes it more difficult.

While we don't support letting babies to cry alone, there are various gentler things you can try.
Here's a link on some strategies and we'll be here to help with them like I said.
Teaching Sleep- Tips from the boards

You'll click on the 3-5 month teaching sleep.

Also, if you go to the main page of the forum, under FAQ, click
On SLEEP and there are tons of resources for how to support your baby's sleep
Depending on the issue.

Finally, here's a thread with another mama with. 4 mo and the info on here is great! Many links to the exact info I mentioned.
How to stop sleeping in recliner with 4 month old.

[ginger428]

Hi Fenner,
How have the nights and day sleep been this past week?

I also wanted to clarify my suggestions from before after some Help from another mod. Instead of jumping to 4 hrs apart for feeds, try 3 hrs and make note of when he feeds and doesn't. If he consistently has a solid 3 feeds, by all means continue. What do you do right after a feed at night? Burp and put down? At that point try a slow and steady, firm pat and shush. Pick up
/put down may not be the best bc he uses a paci. PU/PD and Paci Use. Why they don't mix.

If sh/pat doesn't work after trying for a few days, try gradual withdrawal. One trick of mine in the beginning was to get down with baby and nuzzle him and then ever so slowly get back up replacing my hand on his back to keep some pressure (reassurance).  And gradually apply less and less pressure with each time. It took a lot of patience but it did pay off!