Author Topic: getting my LO to nap more than 30/45 minutes at a time, help!!!  (Read 700 times)

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Offline Kpop

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hello

my LO is about 12 weeks old and we have been on EASY for 1.5 weeks and we are making gains but still frustrated with naps.  We get her to sleep easily, but she only naps for 30-45 minutes before waking up and then we are forced to shush- pat for the next 45-60 minutes . . . . and it isn't working.  Can we do wake to sleep for naps? if so any advice on how to do it without actually waking her?

we are on a a2.5 hour routine, waking at 7am... working towards 3 hour routine,  also it needs to be said we tried switching to a "looser" swaddle with arms by her head not at her side . . .

THoughts?

Thanks!!!

Offline Martini~

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Re: getting my LO to nap more than 30/45 minutes at a time, help!!!
« Reply #1 on: March 23, 2017, 19:59:01 pm »
Hmmm what is her A time at the moment?
~Marta

Offline Kpop

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Re: getting my LO to nap more than 30/45 minutes at a time, help!!!
« Reply #2 on: March 23, 2017, 20:00:05 pm »
1 hour to 1 hour 15 min, then she gets tired so I am afraid to push her and miss the slee window

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Re: getting my LO to nap more than 30/45 minutes at a time, help!!!
« Reply #3 on: March 23, 2017, 20:02:17 pm »
Hmmm with too much A you only will get a OT short nap, but... if so:) you still are having short naps so what you have to loose:)? At 3mo I would work towards 1,5h A and start from the morning A when she is rested after night sleep. Remember also that OT naps are easier to be resettled.
~Marta

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Re: getting my LO to nap more than 30/45 minutes at a time, help!!!
« Reply #4 on: March 23, 2017, 20:04:26 pm »
so you think before 1st nap, i should stretch her to 1.5 hours ( 1st A I usually only get 1 h and 5 min) and let her be OT for first nap? 

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Re: getting my LO to nap more than 30/45 minutes at a time, help!!!
« Reply #5 on: March 23, 2017, 20:05:19 pm »
I believe ( correct me if I am wrong) we have too LITTLE A?  no?

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Re: getting my LO to nap more than 30/45 minutes at a time, help!!!
« Reply #6 on: March 25, 2017, 18:25:03 pm »
Hi there, sorry you had to wait a couple of days.
Yes your A time is likely too short for this age, 1hr 30 would be to aim for. You can increase over 2 days if you prefer, so 1hr 15 tomorrow then 1hr 30 the following day.
Average A times- BOOKMARK ME!
Also yes you can W2S, this can be very helpful to keep LO asleep and help transition from one sleep cycle to another, here is the info, I sugges naps option 1 to shush/pat through the transition and into deep sleep. if your LO is often waking at 30 min you need to go in a little earlier though, at 20/25 min, the FAQ says 30 min as it is based on a 40 min cycle.
How do I address habitual wakings? (wake-to-sleep and other methods)

sorry, pushed for time, hope that helps for now.


Offline Kpop

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Re: getting my LO to nap more than 30/45 minutes at a time, help!!!
« Reply #7 on: March 26, 2017, 15:40:51 pm »
Hi, me again, ( sorry)

so we are working on W2S and nap #1 is going well, but nap #2 and #3 she isn't responding to w2s  :( Not sure if we are still getting the timing wrong or what.  We go in at 30 minutes, stroke her face and get her to twitch or move in some way, gently pat and she goes back down, 5-10 minutes later she is awake from her nap, and then we resume shush patting for about 45 minutes --till its time to Eat.  Very frustrating.
2 questions:
1.  When does shush pat stick?  I feel like my LO can put her self to sleep initially, but cannot put her self BACK to sleep mid nap.  To me, this was what I liked at BW, it taught my LO how to sleep/ put herself to sleep?
2. any other thoughts? maybe she is just a short napper? should I increase her A beyond 1.5 hours? 
3. What if I hold her in my arms while she is in deep sleep at the 30 minute mark and hold her for like 15 minutes to see if she can transition btw sleep cycles in my arms?  She used to love sleeping on us . . .  ( I realize this sounds silly/ crazy, but I just want her to nap well)  Does this defeat the purpose of sleeping independently?  not sure . . .

THanks!

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Re: getting my LO to nap more than 30/45 minutes at a time, help!!!
« Reply #8 on: March 26, 2017, 19:06:47 pm »
I think you've onlybeen sleep training for about two weeks, is that right? It's a very short time and only to be expected that if a LO has spent around 12 wks sleeping on someone or in arms then they are going to take a little while to get used to self soothing and sleeping alone without that constant contact and movement.

could you look again at the link I gave you above on the W2S please?  naps option one as I said is the most appropriate for your LO at this point. It is not about disturbing her sleep but seeing her through the transition from one sleep cycle to the next. If you do a few rounds of this (3 days on, 1 day off to observe then back to 3days on if needed etc) you can help her build the habit of a longer nap and learn to transition alone.

I would not lift her to try to extend the nap to be honest, this won't help in the long run.


Offline Kpop

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Re: getting my LO to nap more than 30/45 minutes at a time, help!!!
« Reply #9 on: March 26, 2017, 19:58:20 pm »
Okay makes sense, sigh I understand why it's probably not the best idea

Offline Kpop

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Re: getting my LO to nap more than 30/45 minutes at a time, help!!!
« Reply #10 on: March 28, 2017, 21:17:42 pm »
Hi again
So my LO is on a 3 hour cycle. Wake up at 7. Bedtime routine starts at 745, asleep by 830. We are still cluster feeding at 530-6 when she wakes from her catnap and then df at 1015-1030. But so far she sleeps straight through the night.
We have had zero success with shush pat or "seeing her through these transitions," naps are still 30-40 minutes. I have tried w2s over and over again and what happens is one of two things: I wake her (which means I was too late) or she moves a bit then settles and wakes up 5 minutes later. Either way she is in her crib staring at me while I shush pat her and all I can think is "she must be wondering what the heck I am doing, inevitably she starts crying some

So two thoughts:
1. Maybe shushing and patting aren't soothing to my LO? Any other techniques?
2.  Maybe she is just a short napper? If so how can I rearrange my routine, I am hesitant to because I value night sleep so much (esp bc I am already back to work, nanny is helping me w sleep training)
3. Finally perhaps I am just being inpatient, what is a realistic time frame?

Thanks
Karen

Offline Martini~

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Re: getting my LO to nap more than 30/45 minutes at a time, help!!!
« Reply #11 on: March 29, 2017, 08:04:00 am »
Honey - these early months have short naps imprinted in its DNA. But not because they cannot sleep longer in my opinion but usually because the A times are extremely difficult to catch. Secondly it's also about the amount of daily sleep, sometimes you fight for a proper A and still no good nap - and it's just because the already slept enough during day or on previous nap. At that age with DS1 we had 2 good naps and one forced catnap. A times were 1:45-2:30. When we was on 3h routine at that age I couldn't have two good naps on a row ever, but still after a short nap I was doing a normal A time.

Re OT naps, I was much less afraid of them at that age than later as they were just easier to resettle. UT naps were nightmare.

Re shhh pat - for my both LOs it works but only when they were ready to settle. W2S never worked - I can imagine it can work if nap is short because child wakes after 40-45min and wants but cannot make a transition. But with UT - it won't work, LO still will wake, sooner or later.

So if you would like to have better naps I would try to experiment with A times and observe and look for pattern.
~Marta

Offline Kpop

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Re: getting my LO to nap more than 30/45 minutes at a time, help!!!
« Reply #12 on: March 29, 2017, 13:40:58 pm »
Okay thank you
Ut is under tired? Correct?

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Re: getting my LO to nap more than 30/45 minutes at a time, help!!!
« Reply #13 on: March 29, 2017, 13:43:51 pm »
Looked it up :)

Offline Kpop

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Re: getting my LO to nap more than 30/45 minutes at a time, help!!!
« Reply #14 on: April 04, 2017, 12:51:07 pm »
hello again

still no luck with longer naps, but coming to terms with it and accepting it because she sleeps so beautifully at night. so maybe i shouldnt be complaining and thats who my baby is/ working with the baby i have
with that said hwo do i count my A's?
for example
E at 1
A 1-230
Sfrom 230-315
shush pat from 315-4
E again at 4

so does my new A start at 4 again or how do i account for the 45 minutes of shush patting?  is that still the S or??

Thanks!


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Re: getting my LO to nap more than 30/45 minutes at a time, help!!!
« Reply #15 on: April 04, 2017, 20:05:29 pm »
anything that is not sleeping is A time. So if your LO does not go back to sleep then you count the A from when he woke from the nap.


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Re: getting my LO to nap more than 30/45 minutes at a time, help!!!
« Reply #16 on: April 04, 2017, 21:10:32 pm »
 ???oh dear... so my LOs A is 30-45 min PLUS an additional 1.5 hours
Uh oh.... now I am worried

Offline Martini~

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Re: getting my LO to nap more than 30/45 minutes at a time, help!!!
« Reply #17 on: April 05, 2017, 07:55:22 am »
:) instead of being worried just paste here your details log!
~Marta

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Re: getting my LO to nap more than 30/45 minutes at a time, help!!!
« Reply #18 on: April 05, 2017, 14:35:43 pm »
Thank you for your patience kindness and help. Here it is :

Wake up at 7am
Eat
A till 824. ( so 1.5 hours)
S 830-1015 ( nap 1 is her best nap timewise)
E at 1020
A till 1200
S 12-12:34 shush pat for 30 min then give up and feed
E 1:05pm
A till 230
S 230-305, shush pat for 30 min then give up and feed
E at 335
A 335-5
S 505-530 this is her "catnap"
Cluster 1 at 534
Cluster 2 at 7pm
Bed at 8. Asleep by 815
Dream feed at 1030
Sleeps THROUGH the night till 7, when I wake her up!

So my dh says not to worry bc she is sleeping through the night and this is the most important but I am concerned. Bc how will we transition to 4/4 when the time comes?! Also if she does wake up in middle of the night shush pat works within 10 minutes, so it's that shush pat isn't working during the day! I know Tracy says to drop the cluster feed but again it's working for us and my LO seems to bf beautifully those times... my husband thinks we should just stop shush patting and go to eaeasy but I think that will actually throw her off bc she needs to eat approx every 3 hours. Also if we count shush patting unsuccessfully as A her real A is actually 2 hours ?!?!

Thank you so much!!!!!

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Re: getting my LO to nap more than 30/45 minutes at a time, help!!!
« Reply #19 on: April 09, 2017, 21:17:37 pm »
Hi again
so as tracy says " once you get it, it changes again"  for the past 3 days this has been where my LO is heading

wake up at 7am
Eat
A till 835. ( so 1.5 hours)
S 830-10/10:15 ( nap 1 is her best nap timewise)
E right after wake up
A till 1130
S 12:15 the shush pat for 30 min then give up and feed
E 12:45pm
A till 230
S 230-315, shush pat for 30 min then give up and feed
E 345 or after nap and shush pat is over
A 335-5
(S 5pm attempt catnap, but she refuses to catnap, so we are dropping this . . . )
dropping the cluster
E at 6
bedtime is 630-  this is WAY earlier, but i think she is exhausted from no catnap
Dream feed at 1030
Sleeps THROUGH the night till 7, when I wake her up!


again nervous as we are heading towards the 4 month regression and how we will transition to tracys 4/4 . . .  .  Also, my LO is trying to roll and we are trying to take one arm out of swaddle so a lot of changes, still loves her paci

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Re: getting my LO to nap more than 30/45 minutes at a time, help!!!
« Reply #20 on: April 10, 2017, 08:06:40 am »
Hi there - I'm just stopping by to let you  know that I am unable to respond to your question right now as I have a very bad back. I have flagged up your thread to other mods/admin and hopefully you will get some support soon. If not please start a new thread with your current situation.
x


Offline Martini~

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Re: getting my LO to nap more than 30/45 minutes at a time, help!!!
« Reply #21 on: April 10, 2017, 09:02:46 am »
I will try to help Honey:). Her first A is 1,5h and you have a good nap. Probably next A is too short, is it 1:15 till 11:30?
~Marta

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Re: getting my LO to nap more than 30/45 minutes at a time, help!!!
« Reply #22 on: April 10, 2017, 12:30:42 pm »
Hi!
Sorry about your back!
And we are at consistently 1.5 As. It's actually her first A that is sometimes 1.15 but she still takes a 1.5 hour nap after that short A. It's naps 2 and 3 that are short.
She is now 14 weeks old- could she rest for a 3.5easy?

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Re: getting my LO to nap more than 30/45 minutes at a time, help!!!
« Reply #23 on: April 10, 2017, 18:05:04 pm »
It looks like she has a tad short night (10.5 instead of 11-12) which is totally fine but on the other hand may encourage her to take a nice longer nap after even a short A. I would think in the criteria of 3/3.5-4h easy but just push her A times to 1:45 and see what happens. She will naturally find a different feeding pattern when her naps will be longer. And yes I would allow her to eat 3.5 especially in the mornings if she is fine with that and I would not wake at 3h mark if she sleeps well and I would keep 3h if she sleeps poorly.
~Marta