Can't Figure Out 22mo Old's Sleep!

[JennVanessa1083]

Hello...again!

It feels like ever since DS hit 19 months his sleep has been a rollercoaster. We got canines, hit a regression, and had illness. It feels like we never really recovered in terms of a good nights sleep. We have had good nights here and there but nothing consistent.

Now I'm lost on why he is resisting BT every night for about a week.

His usual routine is:

WU 7 am
S 12:30-1 pm (1.5-2 hrs typically; sometimes he has even done 2.5-3 hrs which is long for him)
BT usually 5.25-5.75 (depending on length of nap)

It worked rather well for him until the last week or so where he started fighting BT like crazy. Pushing his A to 6 hours! This has happened with naps of 1.5 to naps of 2 hrs or more. Tonight it was almost 6.5 hours. Of course he wakes up 2.5 hours later crying hysterically

HELP!

[Haribo2012]

Hi just giving you a little bump

[JennVanessa1083]

Thank you!

Not sure how to approach this.

[Mum2lucy]

This isn't really advice but my lg is the same age as your lb. we've often posted around the same time with similar issues and I just wanted to say that my lg is doing exactly the same so it might not be a routine issue and more a developmental stage?
That's what I am hoping for anyway 

[JennVanessa1083]

Lol well it better be! this weekend was a disaster. Today he totally skipped his nap 😳

[ginger428]

Quite honestly, 18-24 mo was the hardest stage for me behAvior wise. DS had this newfound independence that he had to exert every chance he had.

One of the best tips I got was to wear.him.out. So we would do a lot of chasing and climbing on the couch before dinner. Even tickle fights would get his heart rate up. We also started spending more time for bed time routine... more snuggles, more reiterating what would happennext and following through.

Also, at this age our Nap was closer to 1 or 1:30 with a 7 wakeup. I don't know if you've ever implemented set BT or not, but this age is perfect for it. My suggestions are push nap to 1:30, keep BT at 7:30/8 and see what happens. If he contines to fight BT, i would cap nap at 1.5 for now.

[JennVanessa1083]

Thanks so much for the tips!!! So helpful.

Yea part of me is wondering if he's just exercising his right to say no then part of me wondered if I needed to wear him out more.

I also wonder about his routine change. As of now when he naps after 6 hrs A and even sometimes at 6 hrs A, he gives me shorter OT naps  could it be bc I'm not being consistent since these are the days we are out and about etc? He usually does great naps at 5.5 but then the fighting at BT starts. Honestly I can't tell if he's OT or UT since sometimes I don't actually put him down until right at 5.5 so then he falls asleep at 5.75-6 hrs A. Then he tends to sleep a great chunk of the night and then wakes up every 1.5-2hrs from 3:30-4 am up until wake up time. He usually gives me 10-10.5 hr nights on a 2 hour nap. He will only do 11-12 he nights if he had a shorter nap or if his previous day was too long.

I like the set BT idea. I have tried it but it seems he still needs a decent A before bed especially after a 2 hour nap unless his A before his nap is super long.

So I guess my question is should I start trying to put him down for a nap 6 hours after wake up and hope he adjusts to sleep 2 hours?

When is BT then?

Would something like this work:
WU 7
S 1-3
BT ?

Thank you!

[JennVanessa1083]

So I tried:

WU 7 am
S 1-3 pm (popped up in the middle but went straight back to sleep)
BT 8 pm

Either I put him down too late (accidentally right at or it was enough A bc it took him a half hour to finally fall asleep only to pop back up after 1.5 hrs. I just told him it was time for sleep and he complained a bit then drifted again. However, I still got NW at 2 then 6:30.

Today:

WU 7:15 am
S 12:45- 2 pm!!!! (He cried hard for a nap what the?!)
BT hopefully 8 pm

He begged for an earlier nap and was crying hard so I put him down and he drifted within a minute.

Not sure what to make of this 🤔 I'm tempted to just set nap and BT but wondering what's reasonable for his age.

I'm so frustrated.

[ginger428]

That's honestly the BT I would've done, maybe PD at 7:45, but him waking after 1.5 hrs does sound OT, especially if he's crying for bed at 12:45.  But, don't stress too much... if it's any consolidation, my bub does the same thing.  I'm grateful bc he tells me when he needs the sleep even if I can not figure out WHY he does.  In this case, we know that he's having NWs which will disrupt sleep to an extent.  (FYI, we almost always have disrupted nights due to medical issues).

So in just a couple days we know that he's tired for his nap, why don't you keep nap at 12:30/12:45, and just push BT by 15 mins later than your old usual routine.  And you totally know the drill, but let's do that and wait 3 days to see what collective data we can gather. What do you think?

[JennVanessa1083]

I can definitely try that except he only slept for 1:15; he looked like he was going back to sleep but nope he popped his eyes open. He's in a good mood but hat tends to happen no matter what. I only see the effects in NW lol

So with a short nap what do I do?

I'm tempted to not go earlier than 7:30 but I know that could mean trouble for tonight.

So in general, I guess I could do:

WU 7
S 12:30-2:30 pm
BT 8:15 (slightly earlier if he doesn't do a full 2 hrs in nap?)

[ginger428]

Remind me again if he's an 11hr a night sleeper or not? What's his avg in 24hrs? And what are your WU, BT goals (realistic)? Thanks in advance for the recap.

TBH, I would keep BT at 8.  Here's why... if his first A was shorter than usual, then sometimes they need a longer A to bed OR you'll get UT symptoms. Around this age, they can start handling shorter naps... heck, some kids drop them altogether. That's for another thread!  One you'll be at soon I'm sure.   

[JennVanessa1083]

Lol all true.

So his average in a 24 hour period to be well rested is 12-12.5. Usually with a 2 hour nap his nights are between 10-10.5 but can also be 11 hours if he happen to have a longer day.  OT sure if this makes sense.

I like wake up at 7am and bedtime at 8 pm realistically if we are doing 13 hour days of course.

I can push to 8 and just deal with OT wakings just to keep things consistent. That may push his wakeup to 7:30ish since I'm usually horrible at waking him 🙈

[ginger428]

Let me know if he resists BT this time, with nap ending at 2:30, and BT at 8. And yes, let's see how his NWs look tonight.

Wake him up at 7 girl!     Although I am also notorious for letting him lay in.

[JennVanessa1083]

Ok! So to clarify I should stick with:

WU 7 am
S 12:30-2:30 pm?
BT 8 pm?

I think it may also be developmental bc today he said two words very clearly for the first time and he has been talking a lot more but not clearly.

[JennVanessa1083]

Update: I stuck to an 8 pm BT and he woke before 6:30 am 🤔

Yesterday was:
WU 7:15am
S 12:45-2 pm
BT 8

Woke after 2 hours then stirred a couple of times and woke around 3 am, back diwnstirred at 4:30isg up at 6:30.

Should I stick to 12:30 for his nap and normal BT?