Teaching nap sleep to a 3mo old when shush pat doesn't work?

[becj86]

Sounds like you're relaxing into it a bit even though there's still plenty of uncertainty.

I'm suspecting she just prefers a later wakeup+bedtime like her mommy...

Much as I had to just be ok with DS having a really early WU like me

[annesmama]

Yep trying to just go with the flow. Still getting 3 night feeds, 12-1 / 3-4 / 6-7, followed by WU 8-9. Last night was unusual in that she didn't eat at her 4:30 NW... when I pulled her out to feed her, she cuddled up and went to sleep. So we might be cosleeping a bit more.

She's started sitting up in bed. Seems like the new version of getting up on hands and knees -- she always used to do that while she tried to settle. If we let her get to her tummy, it's up to hands and knees and then sitting. And crying. The funny thing is, she also sleeps well on her tummy - if she's half asleep and rolls to her tummy, she settles there and sleeps. It's only during that initial going-to-sleep... what is going on? Not sleepy enough?

She's crawling and sitting up during the day while she plays. A times are 2:30-3:15 usually but don't seem to correlate with short/long naps. Extra E really is necessary I think - otherwise after a long A she wakes from her nap early, hungry.  Unfortunate because I don't want her to be a snacker and makes it hard for me to get away for any length of time. Still mostly just tasting solids. She's close to 6.5 months now.

[becj86]

4:30 NW for cuddle could be that she's cold...

It's only during that initial going-to-sleep... what is going on? Not sleepy enough?

Yes, I suspect she may not be sleepy enough. Maybe just keep a log of A times and when this is happening. Could be due to OT too if she's struggling to settle.

[annesmama]

Yea I was wondering if she could be cold, but her head is always sweaty. Maybe warm? But the rest of her seems a good temp.

Tonight is not good. Two naps, second was  a good nap: 3:00-4:30 so I was feeling hopeful.  Started BT wind down at 7:00, fed at 7:30, asleep at 8:00. But then woke at 8:40 and would not resettle, got gradually more and more upset. She was trying, though, sucking her thumb quietly for a minute before crying, repeat repeat, getting more intense over time. At 10:00 (screaming) I broke down and fed her. It's 10:20 and she's still awake but at least not screaming any more. I didn't think she's OT ... she had plenty of opportunities to sleep earlier if she had wanted to but she didn't. A=3:30 seems within reason and even then she took some time to sleep. Also she was pretty happy post-feed - that wouldn't happen if OT right?

Edit: she fell asleep at 11 when I went to bed. Mostly happy with bouts of fussing from 10-11. NF 1:30, 4:30, WU 7:30.

[becj86]

Maybe having you there is a prop...

[annesmama]

If only it had worked 8:40-10:00! I was there the whole time but she still got screaming upset.

Today she had shots so I expect everything to be wonky for a few days.

[becj86]

Does shushing or singing or holding a hand on her help when she's trying to get to sleep but not succeeding?

Hopefully there's not too much disruption after her shots!

[annesmama]

Nope usually putting a hand on her helps, but on those days the only "fix" is a feed.

She actually had her best sleep ever after shots... went to sleep at 7pm and woke at 8am. Of course, we had to give her Tylenol and hold her to sleep...

The day after we had two long naps! But one of them I was so tired I lay by her and napped myself.

We seem to be converging on 2 naps and ~3h A times. But BT is regressing. Last night had her thru bt routine and ready for sleep at 8:20 (3h A) but she had a second wind and wanted to play. Tried putting her down multiple times but it just made her upset. DH is out of town and I can't handle extended crying right now so I turned on the nightstand light and read a book while she crawled around and was happy. At 9:45 I turned off the light and laid her down again and this time she went to sleep. That's A=4:30 ! I feel like she was UT at 3h but that seems unlikely

[becj86]

Yes. Second wind suggests she was OT. Maybe try something shorter before BT.

[annesmama]

=\ We keep trying different lengths of A time before BT, but it seems like no matter what we do, she ends up staying awake until ~10pm, give or take some.  For example, yesterday her second (and last) nap was 4:40-5:20pm.  BT feed at 6:45 and started trying to put her down around 7:15 (~2h A time). No success.  She was happy and playing in her crib after the feed, then gradually got fussy.  Fed again at 8:50 and she was happy again for another round of playing - and finally went to sleep around 10pm.  So she was definitely not OT when we first started trying to put her down, would not sleep, got OT, would not sleep some more, and finally crashed.  She stayed asleep until her usual night feeds.

Since we seem stuck with OT right now, what is the right protocol for an OT baby?  When OT, she is mostly happy and playful in her crib as long as we're nearby.  She likes to sit up and crawl around and poke mummy's face and try to climb on mummy.  This happy phase sometimes goes an hour or longer.  Eventually she gets fussy and at this point often she'll go to sleep after a feed or sometimes just cuddles/patting.  Sometimes we get a second round of the happy phase.  Is there something we can do to get her to sleep earlier?  We don't want to be rocking her or "putting" her to sleep, though -- we want her to learn to go to sleep herself...

[becj86]

Sometimes you have to get her body used to going to sleep eearlier before you work on her independent sleeping. We know she can do that already.

I think I'd probably try A time of 2:50 then 2:40, etc. for BT til you find a sweet spot.