Need help..really confused...Feeding and Sleeping off track

[creations]

Does she seem like she might be hungry at those night wakes?

The stretch on A time and LO getting cranky in the last few mins is normal, they get into a habit of going to sleep after a certain amount of A time so will seem very sleepy at that time, but having a 45 min nap and then being able to resettle for a further hour sleep sounds very much like the additional time is needed. Over a couple of days that additional 10 mins and you resettling her might get her into a habit of transitioning and sleeping longer on her own - or she might need another 5-10 mins added on to help with that.

We don't consider shush/pat to be a prop as it is easily weaned.  You return to this any time your LO needs additional help to sleep and then reduce again when they are able to cope. Over the months/years of toddler hood I found there were many times I needed to return to soothing my DS through teething, illness, sleep needs/routines changing.  There was never a problem returning to self settling and independence.

[*Ali*]

Can you try to do the shush pat in the cot rather than in your arms?

[Pari281016]

Yesterday was bad...while I was at work and she was looked after by her grandma...she didn't nap well and coz of that she ended up having three naps during the day..morning nap was for an hour ..next one was for 45 mins ...she was cranky after that ..her grandma put her to nap late afternoon and she slept for 1.5 hours ..this  naps was close to her bedtime..we had multiple night wakings..she ended up sleeping with us on our bed most of the night..her grandma puts her in her crib as soon as she sees sleepy cues from her..and it may be under 3 hour A time..

With the night feedings, we recently took her for a check up with paediatrician..got her tongue tie sorted and he strongly recommended not to feed her in the night and since then hubby has been very strict about it...I assume if she is not crying and going back to sleep after we settle her..then she doesn't seem to be hungry...Even while we were feeding her in the night..she used to wake up twice atleast and never took full feed..

With regards to Sush Pat ..it feels like she is getting used to it....we tried doing it while she is in cot but she makes it very hard for us to do it and starts crying...when we take her in our arm..she gets settled straight away..

[creations]

Are you able to ask Grandma to write down the times for you?
Could you perhaps mention that you notice she sleeps better on a longer A time even though she looks cranky before hand?

we tried doing it while she is in cot but she makes it very hard for us to do it and starts crying...when we take her in our arm..she gets settled straight away..

This is part of shush/pat so you can lift her and settle in arms then put down again and continue soothing with shush/pat, if she gets very upset you pick up again and continue in arms again, each time putting down when calm and continuing in the cot.  it's this type of reassurance that will eventually work in your benefit and you'll be able to settle her in the cot.

[Pari281016]

I was at home for two days and I have tried extending her A time from 3 hours to 3:15 minutes and 3 and half hour...but still dint make any difference...she still needed to be resettled at 45 min mark ...I am not sure where am I going wrong..nights are still pretty bad..she ends up in our bed every night..


thinking of giving wake to sleep method a try...how does it work and how long do you have to keep doing it ?

[creations]

W2S can be very useful when LO hasn't learned to transition from one sleep cycle to another, or needs reminding to do so instead of waking fully. Here's a link:
https://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=223809.0
I suggest naps option 1 method.
You do it in cycles so do it for 3 days and then hold off on day 4 and see what happens, if she wakes you have to resettle her, and then start another cycle of W2S the next day for another 3 days.  if she doesn't wake then of course you stop doing it.  Job done.

Don't forget, sleep training is a process that take times, it isn't necessarily a case of something you are doing "wrong" because babies need to learn this skill, it doesn't just happen.  You'll get there.