Author Topic: Please help 4 years still night wakenings  (Read 118 times)

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Offline mary12

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Please help 4 years still night wakenings
« on: July 17, 2017, 11:38:39 am »
Hello

My daughter is 3.7 almost 4 and does not sleep through the night. 3 times a week she sleeps through  the night From 7 30 till 6.30. She sleep 11 or 10 hours a night not nap since 2 years.

She wake 2 time a night cries in her sleep. I go in and tell her to go to sleep put her blanket good and go away. Then she Comes again in 30 minuten.  Probably she can t fall a sleep. So I go in and then do the same. Then she Will get back to sleep. Sometimes she call at different times a night like 11 and for I do the same godin say go to sleep and she does. Sometimes if she does not she call again in a half hour.

I did already try a lot but I can t find the solution. Sometimes she Wakes me up 2 times a night and almost 3 or 4 times in the week.

I did Try to give her stickers if she slept through. But she does not care much for it. Also I noticed she does not remind what she did in the night and it is also negatif because she has not much sticker to put on her paper.

Any way it did not work.

What can I do and Will this ever stop. So she does not cry much and I only go in and out her room a few minutes But she Wakes us a lot of times and me and my husband do get difficult back to sleep because it takING so long for her to sleep through? Why ? Is there an expert.

She did have a time when she was 2 she slept like 8 months through the night. But I don t now why. And the she begin again and she is turning 4 but not sleeping through.

She does not Come out the room in the night.
« Last Edit: July 17, 2017, 13:52:19 pm by mary12 »

Offline mary12

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Re: Please help 4 years still night wakenings
« Reply #1 on: July 17, 2017, 11:39:44 am »
For got to mention she Always sleeps when I put her in bed at 7.15 .

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Re: Please help 4 years still night wakenings
« Reply #2 on: July 17, 2017, 11:53:16 am »
That sounds very tiring.

Have you tried verbal reassurance from outside the room instead of going?  it might be noisy for a few nights because she will shout for you and you will call back to her "everything is okay, go to sleep" (or similar) so she knows she has been responded to and knows you are watching out for her. But she needs to learn to turn over and get back to sleep on her own without your help.

If there is a chance that she is getting cold because she lost her covers can you tuck them in firmly (and check or re-tuck at your BT so it lasts longer) or put her in warmer pyjamas so that loss of covers doesn't matter so much?

Does she have a comfort item she can cuddle up to? Remind her "when you wake in the night get teddy/lovely and give it a cuddle and go back to sleep".

Do you have a gro-clock or lights on a timer so she has an indication of it being night time and knows she is to stay quiet and go back to sleep until morning/sun up/lights on?

On the days that she sleeps through without disturbing you do you see a pattern? Are these days she has additional physical activity such as swimming lesson, dance class or lots of running in the park, something like that?  Physical activity can make a big difference to LOs sleep at this age.


Offline mary12

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Re: Please help 4 years still night wakenings
« Reply #3 on: July 17, 2017, 13:13:59 pm »
She she does have a gro clock so she knows its night.

No I really can t find a Pattern when she sleeps.
She goes 3 x a week to toddler school. We do not bring her her to Sports like dancing etc.we think it Will be to much for her and us. We wait till she has a normal sleep Patten.  So not to much activity.

She is not cold. I tried this many time more clothes less. She does get a warmer pyama From me and she goes up and under the blanket. She never says she is cold.  Before I did had a sleeping bag and she did the same thing.

She has a pacifier only in the night. I am afraid to stop it. And she has her stuffed animals.

Sometimes I go till the door and say ssshhh go back to sleep. Most of the times I go in.

But I go Quick back so she can sleep by herself. And at 7 she also goes sleeping by her self. Sometimes it seems Just like a Pattern.  I wake up wait till mom Comes and the I sleep. But what can we do? And why is she not sleeping through is this normal. I did go to the dockter she seems healthy. So no solution there.

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Re: Please help 4 years still night wakenings
« Reply #4 on: July 17, 2017, 15:07:31 pm »
As you've eliminated all other possibilities I would say it sounds like habit to call and wait for you so it's a kind of prop. When she manages to sleep through it's because she is not waking but when she does wake she can't get herself back to sleep.
Some role play during the day could help, demonstrate how to grab the paci or teddy and turn over snuggle down and go back to sleep, ask her to show you (although she will pretend to sleep).
I would stop going in to be honest. Verbal reassurance from outside the room means she knows she is not abandoned but it is a form of sleep training that's needed to get her to start resettling without you actually going in.


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Re: Please help 4 years still night wakenings
« Reply #5 on: July 17, 2017, 18:24:23 pm »
Yes thanks I was thinking this today. I will reassure From the door and talk with her through the day. So I am going to try this. I think you are Wright it is like a prop to her.

Are there more was to stop props? Can I read this some where?

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Re: Please help 4 years still night wakenings
« Reply #6 on: July 17, 2017, 18:26:20 pm »
What If I don t go in? Or is That not a smart thing to do?
I don t want her to come to my room? ???

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Re: Please help 4 years still night wakenings
« Reply #7 on: July 17, 2017, 18:56:16 pm »
Are there more was to stop props?
Props can be gently weaned (gradual withdrawal) or dropped cold turkey (just dropped out right). Either way you would reassure and comfort your LO through the difficulty of the change.
I think you're really at the point now where there isn't another step in a gentle wean or gradual withdrawal other than verbal reassurance from outside the room.  You are already only going in for a brief time then leaving again so verbal reassurance is the next step really.
The only other option I can think of is to keep doing what you are doing which is a form of WI/WO (walk in walk out) until she out grows it. Personally I'd go for trying to break the habit and get that last bit of sleep training that needed - partly because I only have enough energy and patience for a certain number of days/weeks and then I'm exhausted so I prefer to tackle tricky times even if it means a few nights with even less sleep.

If she comes to your room you return her. First time you say "It is night time go to bed" and take her hand and take her back to bed put her in and say "go to sleep".  If she gets up again you do a "silent return" where you do not speak but take her hand, guide her to bed, then leave.  And repeat as needed.  She'll get the message and eventually sleep.