Author Topic: 15 month old Sleep  (Read 1300 times)

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Offline Gummi_bear63

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15 month old Sleep
« on: July 28, 2017, 13:58:49 pm »
I spent a lot of time here when my son was younger.  He has always been a terrible sleeper and finally by 12 months he was going to sleep on his own and sleeping through the night.  At 12 months he went to daycare, and we did okay with night time sleep but naps on the weekends he started to cling to me and not want to be put down and in desperation I ended up rocking him to sleep.  Terrible I know but that's what happened.  Now he happily rocks to sleep for his first nap but has recently started to reject his second nap.  Then last night I put him down about 15 minutes early because he apparently only slept 30ish minutes all day at daycare and it was a disaster.  When I was feeding him his bottle he was laughing and throwing it and being silly.  I tried to put him down and he screamed.  After about an hour and a half I ended up rocking him to sleep.  He almost didn't seem tired.  He would cuddle me at points and let me pat his back but wouldn't close his eyes.  This could just be because he was overtired from the day or something but he's had bad nap days at daycare before and been fine.  So I started to look up the 18 month sleep regression and although I read it can start as early as 15 months, I'm not sure this is it but it made me think I better prepare for this one.

His current schedule when at home is something like this:

Wakes 6:00
Naps 9:30.  Used to be about 2 hours but now is shortening.  I've been trying to extend this awake time to get it right....it seems late to still be having 2 naps but he always sleeps 30 minutes when we've had to try for one.
Naps  2:30ish(This one varies a bit depending on his first nap)
Bed 6:15

Nap routine: Bottle and rock.  Pat and shush on shoulder and falls asleep. 

Bed routine: Bottle and then cuddle with lullaby and back pats.  Put down awake.  Usually goes to sleep within 10 minutes on his own happily.  **Used to do stories but he started freaking out after the last book and it was ruining bedtime so I removed.  He HATES baths so this wasn't a great part of the routine either...do it other times so as not to upset him before bed***

So I guess I have multiple questions:

1.  I honestly cannot remember how I got my son to sleep on his own for naps...life was a bit of a blur then.  What would people recommend for getting him to sleep on his own for naps again? I feel at a total loss about what to do.

2.  Perhaps he's ready for one nap but I haven't had any luck with this.  Should I continue to push the first nap a little each day until he sleeps his usual two hours again?  What should I do if he rejects the second nap?  Honestly he's been having car naps the last week often in the afternoon because he rejects his second nap and we go out and he falls asleep.  So to me this means he still needs it. I may be trying to early for the second nap so will try and extend this as well.

3.  If refusing to go to bed continues, or worse yet night wake ups return, how should I deal with this?  Everything about regressions says don't fall into bad habits like rocking but I have done this in the past because I don't know what else to do.  It seemed last night like I either let him scream himself to sleep which obviously I don't want or rock him to sleep.  I tried patting his back in bed but he just kept crying and grabbing at me.  So what are some recommendations for getting through regressions or nights where suddenly he won't go down on his own?

Thanks!

Offline ginger428

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Re: 15 month old Sleep
« Reply #1 on: July 28, 2017, 17:42:37 pm »
1.  I honestly cannot remember how I got my son to sleep on his own for naps...life was a bit of a blur then.  What would people recommend for getting him to sleep on his own for naps again? I feel at a total loss about what to do.

Does he go to sleep at bedtime independently (besides last night)? I would start by mimicking your bedtime routine, and using a key phrase like "sleepy time" or just "nap time" about 20 min, 10, then 5 min prior to the nap. My son needs the reminders as he sometimes just hates to stop what he's doing. I don't make a big fuss, just a quick reminder where he looks at my eyes when I say it so I know he heard me. I kneel down to him and quietly say it if he's in the middle of playing. Saying beforehand exactly the 2-3 steps before sleep helps my son.  So as we're walking up the stairs, I'll say first we'll sit on the red chair, read 1 book, then you hide in your blanket and mommy will kiss you and come back when you wake. After the last book, I quickly say I"m going to get you and he runs to his bed and hides in the blanket. As best as possible, keep calm and expect the best and use humor if he responds well to it. If he fusses, smile and but firmly say what's going to happen. And keep at it for at least 4-5 days.


2.  Perhaps he's ready for one nap but I haven't had any luck with this.  Should I continue to push the first nap a little each day until he sleeps his usual two hours again?  What should I do if he rejects the second nap?  Honestly he's been having car naps the last week often in the afternoon because he rejects his second nap and we go out and he falls asleep.  So to me this means he still needs it. I may be trying to early for the second nap so will try and extend this as well.

His first awake time is short for his age (generally speaking). He is probably UT. I would love this out to 10 at first for 2-3 days, then move it out by 15 mins every 2 days until you get to around 11:30/12. Meanwhile, offer his pm nap as a catnap around 3 or 3:30 for 30 mins, and bedtime closer to 6:30.
Here are other strategies for this transition...

https://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=163278.0

I will say that this transition can be messy and that's normal.  We went back and forth from 2 to 1 nap, with catnaps reversing from pm to am, until we finally got to a good, single mid afternoon nap.

3.  If refusing to go to bed continues, or worse yet night wake ups return, how should I deal with this?  Everything about regressions says don't fall into bad habits like rocking but I have done this in the past because I don't know what else to do.  It seemed last night like I either let him scream himself to sleep which obviously I don't want or rock him to sleep.  I tried patting his back in bed but he just kept crying and grabbing at me.  So what are some recommendations for getting through regressions or nights where suddenly he won't go down on his own?


*generally* speaking, 12mo have awake times of up to 4-4.5 hrs.  With a solid 12 hr night, he probably needs a little more activity and time before sleep.  I think his bedtime resistance could have been bc he was UT, but led to OT due to messing around. I really think a tweak in his routine could help, so you can try that first. It is a little early for the regression, so we can try the routine before addressing the behavior.

Again, I would move his morning nap straight away to 10, and see how he does.  Then move 15-20 min every 2 days, and see. If you want to preserve a 6:15/6:30 bedtime, his pm nap will have to be shortened or he won't be tired enough for sleep. You can start with 30 mins, and bedtime 4 hours later.

What do you think?
« Last Edit: July 28, 2017, 18:01:24 pm by ginger428 »

Offline Gummi_bear63

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Re: 15 month old Sleep
« Reply #2 on: July 30, 2017, 15:13:52 pm »
Thanks for the suggestions. Giving it a try. Update from the last couple days

Day 2 of sleep issues:
Bedtime: a little later than usual thinking this is problem. Appears to be sleeping or trying to sleep as normal for 8 minutes. Pops up screaming.  Eventually I have to rock him to sleep.

Day 3:
Tried 10am nap. Went down with rocking as normal. Slept 1.5h. This is typical for lately but not as long as I would like.  Used to be 2h.

Attempted both bed and car naps for afternoon. Would not sleep.

Wild at bedtime. Around 6:00. Screamed when put down. Had to rock to sleep.

Day 4(now) tried for same nap today. Except 10:30 as he woke at 6:30. Suddenly rather than rocking to sleep as he has for months, he acted wild(throwing bottle, trying to dance and squirm it if my arms) like he's been doing for bed and nap 2. Tried to put him down and he just screamed. Eventually rocked him to sleep. But not until almost 11. Scared he will wake in 30 minutes as this is pushing it too long at once, but that remains to be seen.

Why would he suddenly refuse this first nap? The timing worked yesterday. Is this normal?  You mentioned it being messy but is this what happens? Works some days and not others?

I still don't know what to do about bedtime. I've rocked him to sleep for 3 nights and totally screwed things up. Everything says it will be hard, but do not resort to these methods like rocking. But unless I let him cry-what else can I do?  I really need some suggestions. Trying to pat him to sleep leads to him screaming and pawing at me and doesn't work. Any suggestions for this??? Thanks

Offline ginger428

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Re: 15 month old Sleep
« Reply #3 on: August 02, 2017, 05:09:52 am »
It's very tough to start sleep training... and I know it can be frustrating not knowing what is going on or how things will turn out.

Since he's been rocked to sleep for the past 3 months, he will likely protest the sleep training. It's up to you to decide if you think this is a good time to do so... is he teething? Is he showing separation anxiety other times in the day? How is day are going? How do they do naps at daycare? I can't imagine they rock him for every sleep time?

Whenever you choose to stop the rocking, I would suggest not to do it again as this causes confusion and more resistance. It is very hard, and you won't ever leave his side, but there will be tears... but we can always be present to comfort them.

Here are two methods for toddlers:
https://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=80750.0


What time were the pm naps attempted?

1.5 hrs of nap is actually a great amount. We want to aim for total day sleep of 2 hrs... so 1.5 in am, 30 mins in pm. Or one long one around 1.5-2 hrs is also fine for this age.

If he resists the am nap again, stop and go play for 30 mins and try again-  if he slept 12+ hrs the night before, he might not be tired at 10:30.