10 month old nap routine help!

[JCN]

Hi, my LB is 10.5 months old (9.5mths adjusted age). We've had a good EASY routine for a couple of months now but I think it needs tweaking so just looking for some advice...

Our current routine looks *something* like this (on a good day!)

WU 5:30-6:00am (normally closer to 6, but can be 5:30 on a bad day)
A 3.5hrs
S 9:30 (this nap ranges from 1-2hours, normally at least 1h10  but lately seems to be more towards 2hrs)

A 3.5-4hrs (depending on when he woke)
S 15:00-16:00

BT 19:30

The problem I'm having is that he has started to really fight his afternoon nap. For all other naps/BT he is put down awake and self settles to sleep perfectly so I know this is not the problem. Sometimes he will settle if I hold him for a while or pat/sssh but sometimes he fights me, so I don't think it's a separation anxiety problem or wanting cuddles etc.

I don't think he is readyfor a 2-1 Nap transition because he is SO ready for a nap by 9:30am and I wouldn't be able to push this back past 10am I don't think.

I'm wondering if i need to cap his morning nap at 90mins? This problem is definitely worse on days where his morning nap runs later - although this never used to be a problem when he happened to nap for longer in the morning, I'm assuming now he's older that his sleep needs are changing.

Both yesterday and today I tried his afternoon at 3/3:30 and it resulted in a lot of resistance and him not falling asleep until closer to 16:00, when I then of course had to wake him early so as not to run too close to BT. Last night, because of a later pm nap he ended up having a much later BT, which isn't ideal. Today, he fought his nap until 16:15 at which point I gave up and powered through without one and have done an early BT of 18:30 instead.

Please help!

[creations]

I don't think he is readyfor a 2-1 Nap transition

The readiness can change very quickly. Some LOs go on a journey of transition over months and months where you might find semi-stable routine in there and keep tweaking it a bit when needed until eventually the drop to 1 nap. Others though seem great on 2 naps and then quite suddenly not great and need to make the move to 1 nap early.  it's a possibility. Keep an open mind

I'm wondering if i need to cap his morning nap at 90mins?

Yes this is an option, it's only going to work if there is no resistance for nap 2 when he does 1hr or 90 min nap here at nap 1.
You can certainly try this. Then do nap 2 and BT at the normal times.
Some LOs continue on two naps of around 1hr each for a good while and seem fine on it even though we usually say that a nap is not restorative unless it is 1.5 hrs or longer.
The difficulty I have in this routine is that LO learns not to sleep longer but to wake at 1hr so when they have to drop to one nap you may need to re-teach that the nap needs to be longer, 2hrs or more.

Another option is to reduce nap 1. Start it later and end it at the same time, so instead of 3-4 do 3.30 - 4pm.  I see you said you tried this and he still resisted, it could be that you need to be consistent over a number of days.  It could be that you tried to WD too early so he started his resistance and then continued it well beyond a time when he might have gone down more happily.
I would be willing to move that CN later at 4 - 4.30 and move BT 30 min later to 8pm too.
it's just another option really so you have some idea where you might be headed and can have a think about what you feel will suit LO better.

Today, he fought his nap until 16:15 at which point I gave up and powered through without one and have done an early BT of 18:30 instead.

LOs can often go through a phase of refusal and then suddenly decide they do need that nap after all and return to accepting it more readily.  I wouldn't read too much into it happening only one day but if this continues and you just cannot get him down for the CN then I'd suggest a bigger change to the routine for example:
- cap nap 1 at 1hr (so 2 naps of 1hr each say)
or
- push that single nap later even though he is very tired to balance out the day and reduce that long A time before EBT
or
- a mix of 1 nap and 2 nap days. Having a 1 nap day can mean LO is happier to go down for 2 naps the following day. Personally I don't like this route as it just doesn't suit mine (or my DS's) ned for consistency of routine. But it works for many LOs.

Hope this helps

[JCN]

Thanks - that's all really helpful and lots to consider.

Today, after a 6:00 WU, i took him for his morning nap at 9:30 as per usual but he took 10mins to drop off (no fussing, jus rolling around and chatting to himself) whereas normally this would be an almost immediate fall asleep after being put down. Does this sound like his morning nap needs pushing later? Even if just to 9:45 rather than 10?

I think he definitely still needs 2 naps so I need to look at how long he is having earlier in the day. In terms of suiting what works for him, I'm reluctant to cap nap 1 to less than 90mins if I can avoid it because he seems to be groggy and grumpy when this happens - I presume because he's been woken mid sleep cycle & also just seems to need more sleep sometimes, although if he naturally wakes at less than 90mins he is always fine . I will also change nap 2 - maybe shifting it later (3:30pm), to give 4 hours awake from last nap, and  just seeing how that goes for a few days. He has been resisting the nap even at 3:30-4pm but perhaps this is because by this point he's become fed up of trying- maybe if the WD shifts and I don't even bother trying the nap until 3:30 then it will work better.

So, I'm thinking this is what a new routine might look like...

WU 6:00
A 4hours
S 10:00-11:30 (capped if necessary?)

A: 4hours
S 3:30-4:30

A 3hours
BT 19:30

But is only 3 hours before BT too short? I feel like this is a minefield! Lol.

[creations]

Does this sound like his morning nap needs pushing later? Even if just to 9:45 rather than 10?

I think so yes - but I say that based on *your* instinct rather than mine

maybe if the WD shifts and I don't even bother trying the nap until 3:30 then it will work better.

Yes that's the hope. It may take a while.

But is only 3 hours before BT too short?

You'll only know if you try it.
The CN can move later but end at the same time so rather than 1hr CN it is 30 mins 3.30 - 4pm which still leaves 3.5hrs before BT *and* LO is more tired from having shorter CN.
But - if you don't want to cap the CN or LO doesn't respond well to it then lave it at 1hr and if that A time before BT is too short I would move BT to 7.45 and then 8pm. Personally I don't go later than 8pm but I accept 8pm during phases like this and just adapt to the slightly shorter Y time. I prefer a later BT than loads of resistance.
Some LOs do well with a short A time before BT (mine did) but others need it very long.

[JCN]

Thanks for the advice.

After taking 10mins to fall aslee for his morning nap, as I mentioned, he then woke up 45mins later so clearly wasn't tired enough to sleep longer. Tomorrow, as long as his WU stays the same, I will push it to 9:45/10:00 and see if that helps.

Today, however, it does mean that, because he woke from his nap at 10:30am & it was only really a CN, I don't need to worry about pushing back nap 2 today as he's been tired since 1:30pm   

Edit: did afternoon nap at 2:30 (4hrs awake time from morning nap) & after 5mins of rolling around he fell asleep only to wake up 40mins later, unable to resettle.