Author Topic: How to wean shhh/patting?  (Read 1172 times)

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Offline CanadianMum

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How to wean shhh/patting?
« on: September 22, 2017, 16:35:47 pm »
Hello again!

My DD is now 18 weeks old and her day currently looks like this:

W: 6:30
E: 6:35
A: 2 h
S: 8:30- 10:00 (falls asleep in crib with paci and shh/pat, wakes at 42 min, easily shh/pats back to sleep when paci put back in)

E: 10:05
A: 2h
S: 12- 1:30 or 2 (same as above nap)

E: 2:00
A: 2h
S: 4-4:45

E: 4:45
A:
E: 6:15
S: in bed around 6:30, sleep by 7:00

If she wakes up at 1:30 from her nap or starts her day early, we end up doing two cat naps to prevent OT at bedtime.

NW: usually 2- around 11, around 3. Often wakes at 5:15 and easily shh/pats back to bed. Have tried dream feed unsuccessfully many times (won't latch!). On a bad night, she will wake up more times than that but I can quickly shh/pat her back to sleep without feeding. I do not feed if it hasn't been at least 3 hours since she last ate.

My question is how to wean shhh/patting. We only began using shh/pat about 3 weeks ago. Prior to that I was rocking to sleep so I am very happy that she is learning to self soothe! I usually stay in the room for about 10 minutes after she closes her eyes. If I leave prior to that, she almost always wakes back up and I have to start over. At what age do they start to tie sleep cycles together typically? And should I just keep staying in for 10 minutes until then? She tends to stare at me while falling asleep even though I don't make eye contact so I am afraid I am becoming a prop! I don't turn her on her side or cover her eyes because she gets agitated. She has done a handful of 1.5-2 hour naps on her own without intervention since we started this shhh/pat.

Any help greatly appreciated! Mostly I am very happy with this routine but we have only gotten this far thanks to this forum so I'm very appreciative!
« Last Edit: September 22, 2017, 16:43:48 pm by CanadianMum »

Offline ginger428

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Re: How to wean shhh/patting?
« Reply #1 on: September 22, 2017, 20:16:30 pm »
At this age, it takes about 25-30 mins for them to deep sleep, and full sleep cycles are about 50-60 mins until 6-9months. I think the transition starts around 4 mo and can be a cause of sleep regressions around then.

To wean sh-pat for you, I would start by removing yourself from sight as best as possible. So, you can sit on a chair next to the crib with your arm in through the bars and your head down.  After a couple nights of that, you can start reducing both the sh and pat parts... quieter shhs until you no longer are, and slower pats until it becomes a touch. And eventually, until it becomes such a light touch, she may not notice. Probably takes about a week or so. If you feel she is doing well with it all, you can try putting her down one day very gently with a hand on her, then lift and leave the room. If she lifts her head, wait to see what happens before re-entering... she may put her head back down... or if she starts whimpering or crying, go back in and without a sound place a hand. Always do the last least thing you tried... so if you stopped shhh and just patting, just pat when you go back in. 

Hope that helps!