Hi there
Sometimes LOs expect mummy to feed them because after all milk came from mummy (or another care giver if bottle fed) so they expect mummy/care giver to continue with the solid foods too.
A few things which can help (you may already be doing these):
- eat the same thing as your LO at the same time (either give LO the family meal or if you are giving particular finger foods then have those yourself too)
- demonstrate how to eat the food and make some yum sounds
- talk about what you are eating in a very enthusiastic way "ooh I have a carrot stick here, do you have a carrot stick? Does yours look the same as mine? Ooh yes it does. I'm going to try it, mmm, nice, how's yours? is it tasty?"
- hold out food for LO to take from you (rather than him having to pick it up himself) and encourage him to take it eg "you try" "you do it"
- if you prepare mashed foods pre-load his spoon but then show him how to take the spoon and feed himself
- keep everything light and happy so that meal times are good experiences and encouraging rather than demanding for him
- ignore food dropped to the floor, clear it up later rather than during meal time
What are the dry puffs? Are they a shop bought baby snack? it could be that he likes to pick those up himself because they are dry, perhaps try some drier foods for him to pick up? Toast, bread sticks, crackers. Dry baked apple wedges (or potato, carrot, sweet potato, etc) are relatively dry on the outside but soft inside, if your DS doesn't like wet squishy things in his hand things like this could help. Maybe try some savoury scones or sugar free mini muffins which are dry to pick up (and although savoury they are sweetened with fruit such as banana so are very appealing - he might be more inclined to self feed if he is getting "cake"). I used to make lots of mini American pancakes and oaty chews which are dry too.
if you can just expand what he will self feed bit by bit eventually he'll get that he is to feed himself every meal.
You could also try a fork rather than fingers, mine always used a fork from very young as spoons are pretty tricky to manipulate properly without the food dropping off. Forks are more forgiving for turning them the wrong way or switching from hand to hand. Mine kind of got used to having the mess on his hands but he wasn't a huge fan of messy eating and the fork helped.
Setting aside 5 mins or so before a meal to spend focused 1:1 time with him could help. if you are busy preparing food and the time he gets with you is when you are feeding him this could a way of him getting some lovely bonding time. If you spend 5 mins chatting, cuddling, reading a book etc before the meal he might have his mummy cup more filled before he eats and be more inclined to have a try. Keep up the encouraging chat though so he still feels the positive effects of family sharing a meal.
Does he pick up a sippy cup himself to have a drink of water?
Otherwise, try not to worry too much. He'll get there bit by bit.
Hope this helps some
