Author Topic: Not wanting to nap then struggling to wake up when finally does drop off!  (Read 4084 times)

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Offline choc

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My 27 month old ds is fighting his nap and messing around a lot at put down which is 1.30pm. He does finally drop off after 25/20 mins. Then I wake him at 2.30 but it's a real struggle to get him to wake up. Yesterday I lifted him out, carried him downs stairs and put him on the sofa and he went back to sleep! He has also started waking early in the morning although he does usually drop back off. He fights bed time as well and can take 30mins plus to drop off. Bedtime is 7.30.
Is it time to start thinking of getting rid of the nap? It just doesn't make sense as once he is asleep he is so hard to wake and seems so tired! Yet he messes around at all slept put downs and has some ew.
Gemma



Offline becj86

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Makes more sense to just move the nap 30mins later and let him sleep when he needs to. His EWs are suggesting he needs a later nap. How long is his day?

Offline choc

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It's difficult with the school run to move much later without chopping the nap down a lot. He wakes around 6.30 usually and I put him down at 7.30pm. I have to wake him by 2.30/2.45 latest for the school run.
Gemma



Offline becj86

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Righto, so your day's a reasonable length. Can he sleep on the school run? Its not super fun to spend 30mins trying to get to sleep when he's not tired enough... Does he transfer cot to carseat? He may drop off again when you get him in the car?

You really are probably pretty close to the nap dropping but I think if you can APOP the nap in the car (how long is the school run?), maybe that will help.

Offline choc

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School run is 15 minutes journey there. He won't transfer cot to car or the other way round! He also wakes as soon as the buggy stops walking or car. He has always been a pain in the bum!! He may just have to have a later nap around 2pm and I will have to find a way to wake him up and hope he doesn't go into a massive tantrum!
Yesterday he dropped off just after 1.30 and I couldn't wake him at 2.45 so left him til 3. Then he didn't drop off til gone 8pm and was awake before 6am 😢
Gemma



Offline becj86

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:( This is such a tricky stage even without a school run. Its very difficult when dealing with other children as well. I remember a time when I thought DS was always tired through the afternoons because his nap had to be capped so he'd sleep at night but he really wanted more sleep at nap time. I guess one way to wake him would be to move him to the car. Its not really nice being woken however you do it, so maybe just have to bite the bullet :-/

How long is his nap generally? I don't know that he should be sacrificing night sleep for day sleep but its hard to tell.

Offline choc

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I don't know how long he'd sleep if I left him! I have to wake him by 2.45 latest on school days and at the weekend I wake at 3 as I chicken out of leaving him too long incase he's worse going to bed!
Yesterday he slept the 1.30 to 2.30 I have been aiming for and he woke himself. He took ages to go to sleep at bedtime, it was 8pm, but slept til 6.45 this morning so not too bad.
I'm going to try the same again today and see what happens.
Gemma



Offline becj86

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Fingers crossed!

Offline choc

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I'm back and things are no better!
I went to a slightly later and shorter nap, 2pm to 2.45 but when I woke him he was having the hugest tantrums. I couldn't get him ready for the school run as he was flipping out so much and I had to stop doing it as I was late to collect ds1 everyday. I just started letting him sleep a bit incase he had got over tired but he still kept taking ages to go to sleep at night and was waking early in the morning still. So yesterday I went back to the hour nap 1.30 to 2.30. He was impossible to wake but we got him up in the end, I pd for bed at 7.20 he fell asleep at 8pm and was awake at 5.55 this morning. So only 10 hours. I'm doing the same again  today to see if we can get some improvement by sticking to some thing as I know I keep chopping and changing.
Does this sound OK for now or any other suggestions?
Gemma



Offline becj86

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Yes, it seems ok as something to stick to for at least 2 weeks to see if he starts sleeping longer in the morning/falling asleep more quickly at BT.

Offline choc

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Re: Not wanting to nap then struggling to wake up when finally does drop off!
« Reply #10 on: February 01, 2018, 07:04:15 am »
Thank you for the reassurance. I will give it a couple of weeks.
Gemma



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Re: Not wanting to nap then struggling to wake up when finally does drop off!
« Reply #11 on: February 01, 2018, 22:42:55 pm »
Just stopping by to share my similar experience. My DS also needed his full nap and couldn't function on less.  From 25 - 31 months was tricky because I was concerned about nights getting too short which led me to try capping the nap, it was just a nightmare.  Much better for us to do the longer nap (mine had 2hrs sometimes he'd wake at 1hr 30 if I went in his room but daily capping did not suit him at all) and short night (even 9hrs).  At 31 months he took a huge 2.5hr nap during an illness and dropped his nap cold turkey. Nights lengthened some immediately and then over time increased to 12hr nights (bliss!)
Thought it might help to know there are others out there who have had similar and although there was a few months where it wasn't an "ideal" routine it was good enough.


Offline choc

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Re: Not wanting to nap then struggling to wake up when finally does drop off!
« Reply #12 on: February 02, 2018, 08:00:14 am »
Thanks for popping by creations, that's really useful to know. Especially as I was just popping on to say we are now having night wakings. I know I am meant to give it some time but just wondered if you had any opinions on what these NWs were. So yesterday was day 3 of the 1.30 to 2.30 nap. He was impossible to wake from it but when he did his mood was actually OK. Bt was 7.30 and after a lot of messing and delaying (need another wee, need a poo, want another drink, what tucking in again all shouted from his cot) he went to sleep at 8pm. He woke at 12.45am, 2am and 3am. The first time was crying but he stopped after a few seconds and didn't need me. The second time he was shouting stuff as though it was a dream. Third time he wanted a wee when he usually goes all night with out going. Then he was awake at 6am.
Im really not  sure what is disturbing his sleep, OT? Ut?
I'm tempted to try a longer nap again but don't want to chop and change if I haven't given the hour nap a long enough chance yet.
Gemma



Offline choc

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Re: Not wanting to nap then struggling to wake up when finally does drop off!
« Reply #13 on: February 03, 2018, 13:55:32 pm »
So yesterday I gave him an extra 15mins, so he had 1.30 to 2.45, which is exactly what he used to be on! We pd for bed at 7.45 instead of 7. 20/30 and he still went to sleep at 8. He woke at 5.30 for a wee then back to sleep til almost 7am.
I'll probably do the same again  today and see what happens. This routine wasn't working for us a few weeks back but you never know now I suppose.
Gemma



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Re: Not wanting to nap then struggling to wake up when finally does drop off!
« Reply #14 on: February 03, 2018, 19:14:50 pm »
That sounds really good.

This routine wasn't working for us a few weeks back but you never know now I suppose.
I experienced with my DS when it came to nap drops it was like he thought he was ready and went for it (eg fighting nap) but then after some time of being horribly tired and the routine not working he went back to a previous routine nicely as though he had somehow realised he wasn't ready and was willing to just settle back down and try again in a few months.  Maybe yours did the same??  Maybe lots of LOs do?


Offline becj86

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Re: Not wanting to nap then struggling to wake up when finally does drop off!
« Reply #15 on: February 03, 2018, 21:42:37 pm »
Yes, I've certainly seen my own DS and plenty of other LOs here have a short drop in sleep needs then go back to their old routine very happily afterwards. FX this works out for you  :)

Offline choc

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Re: Not wanting to nap then struggling to wake up when finally does drop off!
« Reply #16 on: February 04, 2018, 09:01:03 am »
Thanks! Last night was asleep at 8.10pm and slept through to 6.45. Nap was 1hr15. Is that enough sleep in 24 hours?
Gemma



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Re: Not wanting to nap then struggling to wake up when finally does drop off!
« Reply #17 on: February 04, 2018, 19:17:19 pm »
About 11hr 45? Yes I think that's enough for some.  Mine was down to about 11hr in 24, I was concerned his nights were so short, anything under 10hrs made me worry (and he was down to about 9hr overnight) but we got through and his longer nap was definitely more important than the longer night.


Offline choc

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Re: Not wanting to nap then struggling to wake up when finally does drop off!
« Reply #18 on: February 04, 2018, 20:14:19 pm »
Thanks for the info. He's still not asleep tonight at 8.12. Hopefully he'll drop off soon. I put him down later than usual with the hope he would drop off at his usual time but with only 15 mins of bedtime messing instead of 40! Not sure it has worked!
Gemma



Offline choc

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Re: Not wanting to nap then struggling to wake up when finally does drop off!
« Reply #19 on: February 15, 2018, 07:37:14 am »
I'm back and looking for a little more advice please! I  continued with the 1.30 nap for 1hr15 mins and for about 3 days he was going to sleep about 8pm and waking around 6 45 which was fine (6 45 to 7am is ideal wake up)  but we were having at least 1 crying night waking. Then on the 7th I put him down at 1.15 as usual (for asleep at 1.30) and he was asleep in seconds at 1.15. This is totally unheard of these days, so I figured he must be mega tired and I decided to let him sleep what he wanted. He  woke himself at 2.40 so nearly 1hr30 nap. That night he slept 8.15 to 6. 45 with no night wakings! I went back to normal routine the next day 1hr15 nap at 1. 30pm and he slept well, no night wakings. Then the next few days looked like this :

9th
Wu 6.45
S 1.35 to 2.45
Bt 7. 30
Asleep 8.10
Wu 7.30!

10th
Wu 7.30
S 1.35 to 2.50
Bt 7.45
Asleep 9.10!😢
Wu 7.40 am

11th
Wu 7.40
S 1.30 to 2.45
Bt 7.30
Asleep 8
Wu 6.45 am

12th
Wu 6.45
S 20 mins in car about 4 ish (we went to farm)
Bt 7.30
Asleep 7.45
Wu 2.15am on and off til 3.15
Wu 7.15 am

13th
Wu 7.15
S 1.30 tried to wake at 2.30 (dh thought we should cut to 1hr) but couldn't wake him so woke about 2.50
Bt 7. 45
Asleep 7.50
Wu 4.45 am crying, had a drink. Chatting on and off
Wu 7.15 am

14th
Wu 7.15
S 1.40 to 3.10 (decided to let him sleep whatever he wanted but then chickened out at 3.10 incase he wouldn't go to bed!)
Bt 7.40
Asleep 7.50
Wu 6.45 am so really good night on longer nap

I suppose looking over it he hasn't done bad on most of the 1hr15 nap days. It's just when  he has a bad night/early morning /late to fall asleep I start questioning. And then when he does a good night on a longer nap I question if I'm doing the right thing by capping at 1hr15.
So not sure what I'm asking really! Would you do what I'm doing if you were me? Continue 1hr15 nap even though it's producing a bit of a mixed bag? Or would you be doing something else?
« Last Edit: February 15, 2018, 07:42:21 am by choc »
Gemma



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Re: Not wanting to nap then struggling to wake up when finally does drop off!
« Reply #20 on: February 15, 2018, 22:27:55 pm »
It sounds like he'd like the longer nap and might just be happy to go back to something similar to what he had prior to all this.
Another option is to wake him at a set time in the morning so that he doesn't refuse a slightly earlier nap meaning he can have a bit longer nap before the school run?  It's not ideal to have both his sleeps capped but if the WU was capped at say 7am he might do better with the consistency??


Offline choc

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Re: Not wanting to nap then struggling to wake up when finally does drop off!
« Reply #21 on: February 16, 2018, 09:06:07 am »
Yes that is true. Its been half term this week so I haven't had to worry about him waking late and to be honest doesn't happen that often! He is much more of an early waker usually than a late waker. Anyway when we are back to school next week he has to be awake at 7am so that might help. Although it is hard to get him down for an earlier nap as I work mornings then collect him from nursery around 1pm. I could get 1hr30 in rather than 1hr15 though I think.
Thanks for the advice. I'll go for a 1hr 30 nap at 1.15 I think and see how that goes. If he sleeps 8pm to 6 45 ish I'll be happy.
Gemma