I need help with this baby!

[Ilove2sleep]

Ok so I read the baby whisperer book about 5 weeks ago. My baby is 3 1/2 months and I have been following the routine of 3 hours as good as I can. So after about 2 weeks there was improvements in him falling asleep easier and he sleeps regularly from 11-6 at night which is awesome! So for the last two weeks every time to get him to sleep for naps or at night I need to shush pat for a minimum of 30 minutes sometimes an hour and sometimes I can't get him to sleep. I never put him down until he is rubbing his eyes and yawning which is about an hour to 90 minutes after walking. I've tried keeping him up longer but then he just screams due to crankiness. I have been as patient as I can be but I'm just wondering if I should be doing something different? And in the evening he is up from 7-11. I can shush pat until the cows come home but he won't sleep during this time.
Another problem is I can only get him to nurse for 5 minutes. I always offer both sides but he pulls his head away. I've tried feeding in the dark and silence. The only time he will eat longer is for his dream feed. So I always give him a bottle of pumped milk but even that is not easy. He needs to be bounced/rocked and not have any distractions. I wondered if it was my milk so I tried formula for a week but it was the same problem. Also he screams when I burp him. Just wondering if anyone has some advice for this 1st time mom.

[creations]

Hello and welcome to BW forums

Have you considered the possibility of reflux or silent reflux? It does sound like a possibility from what you've described.
There's a chance this could be the reason you still need to shush/pat for a long time for each sleep and are not feeling like there is a gradual reduction in the time it takes or an increase in the success rate.

His A time could be a little too short, I would try to aim for more like the 1hr 30 rather than the 1hr A time...and possibly a touch more.

Are you feeding every 3hrs?
When you burp are you patting his back?  Have you tried a firm rub instead of patting?  Some LOs are not comfortable with patting and if he has silent reflux patting can be uncomfortable.   I think there was a description in one of the BW books (sorry I don't remember which) of how to hold LO on your knee with a hand kind of on the tummy to gently push it whilst LO is leaning forwards on hat hand whilst the other hand rubs up wards in firm movements from the bottom up the back.  My DS was more comfortable to be winded that way.

[Ilove2sleep]

Thanks for the input! I'm feeding every 3 hours except at night. My dr said her could have reflux but they out grow it and not to worry. Yes I have tried rubbing instead of patting and haven't noticed a difference. It's always obvious when he needs to burp because he starts fussing and if I try to make him sit he screams. So I usually do the over the shoulder. He does  spit up a lot which I heard is another symptom of reflux. Is there treatment for it? Should I alter my diet?

[Jessjess]

Loving your name! Our little one had really bad silent reflux, so he would still regurgitate but he wouldn't actually spit it out.

The cause for his reflux was an intolerance to dairy, but there were other signs as well (always a red rash around his bottom, particularly irritable after feeding etc.)

Doctors are very ignorant to the pain and stress this is causing everyone, we fought for 4 months before anyone would listen and it took a visit to children's A&E to see a Paediatrician who would actually help.

So I would try and speak to the Dr. again, you can have a search online for altering your diet and excluding foods most likely to cause reflux and then taking it from there, but you may need to do that for around 2 weeks before you will see any difference, and then you can re-introduce those foods one by one one every 3 or 4 days or so and then see if there are any consequences.

[creations]

I heard is another symptom of reflux. Is there treatment for it? Should I alter my diet?

Whilst I experienced silent reflux with my DS I know there are others in the community who have more knowledge than I do. There's a colic, reflux and crying board here where you can look at the sticky threads for info and you can post your questions too:
https://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?board=13.0

What I can say from my experience and from experience on the boards over the past several years is that some health professionals will keep on saying LO will grow out of reflux but some need medication.