Author Topic: 6 Weeks & Can't Nap?  (Read 1589 times)

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Offline kristeno

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6 Weeks & Can't Nap?
« on: April 16, 2018, 23:38:57 pm »
Hi! I tried reading through other topics for help, but not finding too much. My son is 7 weeks old & I don't expect much from a routine or sleep right now, but I am trying to help him learn to sleep. His nighttime sleep is great, only waking 1-2 times, but naps are not. Please keep in mind that part of my frustration is that I also have a 2.5 year old, so the way things are going are really not working for us.

Baby's naps are only 30-40 min long & wakes up crying. I have been trying sh/pat & unsuccessful every time. It calms him, but hasn't put him to sleep once. I end up trying for 40 min every time. This just isn't working for us because 1) I have another LO that needs time, attention & supervision, and 2) I want to be able to extend his naps.

I have seen somewhere that some LOs will take cat naps once or twice in a day, which would be fine, but I assume if that's what he needed, he would wake up rested & happy. He is definitely not. He wakes up very upset & it takes time to console him. I have even tried a multitude of ways to help him sleep once he's in bed, but nothing is working. Here's what our day looks like:

WU/E: 830
A: 9
S: 945 - Routine starts at first yawn, typically about 1 hr after WU, in this case, 930
*Routine: Say good night to sister, swaddle, white noise, pray & sing until drifting in my arms (half the time, hell be happy & suddenly scream until he drifts). Set down, eyes barely open. Falls asleep in less than a minute. All in all, about 15 min.

WU: 1015/1030 Wake, crying. Sh/Pat for 15+ min & falls asleep. Stay with him for 10 min.
S: 1045

E: 11
A: 1130
S: 1215

WU: 1245 Wake, crying. Sh/pat for 15+ min & falls asleep. Stay with him for 10 min.
S: 1
WU: Wake, crying. Sh/pat does not work. Try for 40 min & give up because of toddler & feed.

E: 145
A: 215
S: 245 - Tried to shave some time off because of the lack of rest earlier.

WU: 315 Wake, crying. Sh/pat for 15+ min, successful. Stay for 10 min.
S: 330
WU: 345

E: 345
A: 415
S: 5

WU: 545 Wake, crying. Sh/pat for 15 min.
S: 6
WU: 615 Wake, crying.

E: 615
A: 645 - Basically bedtime routine: Bath every other night, jammies, book with sister, swaddle, white noise, pray, sing. Lay in bed barely awake. Falls asleep in few min. All in all, routine takes about 30 min. Then about 15 to fall asleep.
S: 730

DF: 11 (most nights)

NW/E: 2-3

NW/E: 6-7

WU/E: 830

He is a very happy baby, so when he wakes up, once he's done screaming, he's all smiles & coos. I'm wondering if we need a routine adjustment from OT or UT?
Also, we did Wake to Sleep with my daughter & it was awesome! Is he too young to start that? Although, I'm not sure if it would work for him because he wakes up at the 30 min mark, so I never get the chance to do it.

Thank you so much! I know at this age, it's a lot of trial & error to see what fits your baby best, but I just feel like I'm running out of options to try.

Offline becj86

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Re: 6 Weeks & Can't Nap?
« Reply #1 on: April 17, 2018, 08:51:16 am »
Hi :)

Its a bit hard to tell what if anything could really be changed with the routine based on what's written here. I wonder if the WD is a bit too long and maybe he's getting OT though given the number of 30min naps and the length of the WD at 15min.

I haven't ever had a toddler and a newborn, so I can't say much from my own experience but I will say I'd probably recommend against spending 40min trying to resettle. If he's going to resettle, you'll know in the first 10-15mins so if it becomes obvious its not going to work, I'd just crack on with the day. I'd also say that if you need to, just go out and about and have a pram nap or a car nap here and there, work on say one nap in the crib per day if you can. That way there's less of an impact on your sanity and toddler's activity.

Has he previously slept longer naps or has it been 30min all his life? Wondering if perhaps he's in a growth spurt at the moment and waking to be fed in which case, just feed even if its only been 2hr and PD for another nap 45min-1hr after the last one.
In this same vein, has he always screamed when he wakes? Some babies just do scream when they wake because there's no mum right there and that's concerning.

Wonder if there's some tirgger for him to wake, like white noise stopping or a door creaking as you go to check on him or similar?

Offline kristeno

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Re: 6 Weeks & Can't Nap?
« Reply #2 on: April 17, 2018, 15:07:09 pm »
It didn't even occur to me that maybe WD was too long. I can try to cut it short. Maybe he needs to lay down asleep longer.

When he was a fresh babe, he slept longer, like 1.5-2 hrs, but I assume it's because he was still brand new & they sleep constantly. I didn't even think of a growth spurt! That makes sense. I have just fed him & put him back down a couple times. When I do that, I'll typically get another 30-40 min nap from him.

He doesn't always scream, sometimes he'll stir, then as he wakes up, he starts crying. I guess it could be because I'm not there. I just thought it was because he was still too tired to wake up & needed to go back to sleep.

There shouldn't be a trigger. The white noise is constant & loud enough that you can't hear anything else in the house. I did that because of the toddler, haha

Offline becj86

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Re: 6 Weeks & Can't Nap?
« Reply #3 on: April 18, 2018, 08:35:56 am »
I didn't even think of a growth spurt! That makes sense. I have just fed him & put him back down a couple times. When I do that, I'll typically get another 30-40 min nap from him.
I think of that with 6wo babies because mine had a massive one at this age and it caught me completely by surprise how voracious he was and how much screaming her was doing. I called the health hotline here because I thought something was terribly wrong and the lovely lady said to just feed and I fed and fed and he came right in a couple of days and everything settled down again.

He doesn't always scream, sometimes he'll stir, then as he wakes up, he starts crying. I guess it could be because I'm not there. I just thought it was because he was still too tired to wake up & needed to go back to sleep.
This is where if you can notice this and try to resettle before he gets worked up with the crying, you can help him learn to connect those sleep cycles. They become more pronounced and babies who previously slept long naps have to learn to get through the transition to then sleep longer naps again.

Offline kristeno

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Re: 6 Weeks & Can't Nap?
« Reply #4 on: April 18, 2018, 15:03:57 pm »
That sounds great, thank you! I know we can get through this, I just have the hardest time distinguishing between OT & UT, I was afraid I was missing something.

Is Wake to Sleep affective at this age?

Offline becj86

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Re: 6 Weeks & Can't Nap?
« Reply #5 on: April 18, 2018, 21:16:52 pm »
You can certainly try W2S, about 10min before he is expected to wake, sometimes it works.

Offline kristeno

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Re: 6 Weeks & Can't Nap?
« Reply #6 on: April 19, 2018, 15:41:34 pm »
Okay great! I will!!

I have finally had some success with Sh/pat!! It works about 50% of the time, but I think he is in a growth spurt. All he's doing is sleeping, waking to eat & repeat. Thank you for talking through this with me!

I'm wondering if I'm using that technique to get him to sleep, how long should I try it before I stop if he's not going to sleep? The entirety of his naptime?

In Tracy's book, there's a sample EASY for this age stating that for the first nap, just swaddle & lay in bed to sleep, then it says it could take up to 15-20 min, but in another place, it talks about waiting until baby is drowsy, but awake. Do you know if she means to do Sh/pat or just set baby down? Do I not wait until he's drowsy specifically for that nap only?

Offline becj86

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Re: 6 Weeks & Can't Nap?
« Reply #7 on: April 20, 2018, 06:09:23 am »
I'm wondering if I'm using that technique to get him to sleep, how long should I try it before I stop if he's not going to sleep? The entirety of his naptime?
That's a quick trip to insanity! Just try until you know if its going to work - I guess about 10-20mins should be enough to know. Then you can either APOP (Accidental parenting on purpose) a nap in pram/carrier/sling/whatever or just get him up, feed and have another go in 45min-1hr.

Do you know if she means to do Sh/pat or just set baby down?
Sorry, I don't know for sure. I think its reasonable to do for all naps what your baby needs to get to sleep and slowly reduce your assistance however you do that. If shush/pat works, do that. If singing whilst you have your hand on his chest works, do that.