Author Topic: Please Help me get back on track  (Read 1374 times)

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Offline SomedaySoon

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Please Help me get back on track
« on: April 23, 2018, 21:09:50 pm »
Hello!

Please help me sort out our routine.
I'm not sure how much more I can take. DS is 13 months.
He was sick over Christmas and our wonderful EASY routine went awry and I haven't been able to get back on track.

This is a typical day (I could not call it a routine):
    06.30 DS wakes and cries. I try get him back to sleep and fail so bring him into my bed in the hope he goes asleep- I am too tired to get up - he does not go asleep.
    08.00 Bottle then play while I get myself together.
    08.45 - 09.30 Breakfast.
    09.30 Get ready to leave the house at 9.50
    10.00 - 10.30 drop to childminders (depends on traffic)
    10.45 - 11.20 Nap (in a stroller - just recently found out he has always been napping in the stroller!!)
    12.00 noon Bottle/drink
    13.30 - 14.30 Lunch with childminder and her family
    14.45 - 16.05 Nap (again in stroller)
    16.05 Bottle/drink then play
    17.00 Snack
    18.00 - 18.30 Collect from childminder (depending on work)
    18.45 - 19.00/19.30 Dinner
    19.30 - 20.00 Play
    20.00 Bottle
    20.30 Wind down ( change into PJ's and night nappy quiet room, book and cuddle)
    20.45 Put into cot to go asleep, crying and trying to kneel up and sit up. I keep lying him down.
    21.30-22.30 DS eventually wears himself and goes asleep.[/li]

Notes:
    DS wakes at least once a night.
    If I can't get him to sleep after the 3rd attempt I'll bring him into bed with me - I need to get some sleep. 
    This is a typical Monday to Friday.
    Saturday and Sunday is similar but he doesn't want to nap in the cot so by the time I get him to sleep he will only sleep for 40 minutes if at all
    DS is no longer on formula, just cows milk and water[/li]

Problems:
I think DS is overtired, he is not getting enough sleep at night
I think he needs to eat more.
I am exhausted. I nearly fell asleep today driving home from work. I have no Y time. I need time for housework and I am suppose to work from home an hour each evening. My boss has been very flexible and understanding but he is running out of patience.

I need someone to tell me what to do. I cant think straight. I cannot believe I have let the situation get this bad.
Please help
xxx

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Re: Please Help me get back on track
« Reply #1 on: April 25, 2018, 11:54:22 am »
Hello and welcome to BW forums :)

Sorry to see you didn't get any replies yet.

Looking at your current routine I would agree he is not getting a very long night, it sounds like your DS is ready to move to 1 nap per day, rather than 2 naps.  The single nap would be around 12 - 2pm (we usually suggest shifting naps in stages so it's not a big jump) which means he would finish napping at about 2pm and be ready for night sleep earlier in the evening, say 7pm rather than 10.30pm.  I guess he is also delaying sleeping at BT because he wants to spend time with you though which is harder to change.
It looks like he doesn't mind losing night sleep because he has a chance to make up for it in the day with that morning nap which is probably too early for him and doesn't encourage him to wake later in the morning...but he is likely also becoming OT in the evening which can lead to early waking the next morning too.
I'd suggest asking your child minder to shift the morning nap 30 min later (so more like 11.30) and leave it there and aim for a longer nap of 1.5-2hrs or more if he wants it.  Then if needed he can have a little cat nap around 4pm but just 30 min and BT around 8.30pm which is I think what you are aiming for.
Depending how all that goes you may be able to move on and drop the CN relatively soon. Shifting the long nap to 12 noon and no CN, but then bringing BT earlier to 7pm.  If 7pm is very inconvenient for you then over a umber of days both the nap and BT can be shifted 15 mins later each day.

With changing routines snacks and meals will also need to move. This is only a suggestions:
WU 7am
E 7 milk
E 8 breakfast
E 11 snack with drink
S 12 - 1.30/2pm
E 1.30/2 lunch
E 3pm snack with drink
E 4/5pm dinner
E 6 solids snack/supper or BT milk
BT 7pm

I think he needs to eat more.
At this age a common routine is:
2 milks (morning and BT) although these can also be dropped if milk is given at another time of the day
3 main meals with drink of water
2 solids snacks with drink of water (or milk)
Some have a third snack if dropping the BT bottle.

It is advised to drop bottles at 12 months so you can be thinking about that. If you wanted to keep a bottle it would ideally be moved to 30 min before teeth brushing in the evening or to have it at another time of day.
If you are concerned about how much he is eating he might eat more without the additional milk drinks in the day. LOs often have a better appetite for breakfast or lunch rather than later in the evening so if you are concerned about a particular food group being low you might offer those at breakfast or lunch instead of the evening meal.

With regards to where he sleeps, I probably wouldn't bother taking the child minder up on the stroller naps, I'd just let that continue.  More useful for you might be for you to continue the habit at home at the weekends. When he is on one nap you might prefer being able to get and about and time the outings so he can sleep either on the way there or on the way home.  Stroller naps can give you a bit more freedom to do things.  If you didn't want to go out perhaps you could try rocking the stroller back and forth at home?  This need not affect his ability to sleep in the cot for night sleep.

hope this helps, let me know if you have more questions.