Author Topic: Stroller naps and BF to sleep 5 month old -accidental parenting problem  (Read 1344 times)

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Offline DoKi

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Hello everyone.
First of all, I love Tracy Hogg's book and using the Easy routine has really worked great.
However, we do use accidental parenting for napping and sleeping which I would like to get ridd off but can't seem to figure out how.
Our 5 month old boy is roughly on the following routine:
7:00 E
10:00 S
11:30 E
14:00 S
15:00 E
17:30 S
18:00 E
19:00 Bath
19:45 E
20:00 S
(I know that the first activity time is too long but he just doesn't seem to be tired before.)
He is sleeping through the night since he was 2 months old (with some exceptions - teething).
However, we can only get him to fall asleep for a nap when we move his stroller which often gets him to sleep within a reasonably short time. After falling asleep I can park the stroller and he will continue to sleep for 45 minutes. He often wakes up and I can sometimes get him to sleep 1,5 hours by moving his stroller a bit.
In the evening I feed him to sleep which works quite well.
I tried and failed to get him to nap / sleep with ssh-pat...
The accidental parenting (stroller/BF to sleep) actually happened because we have been traveling quite a bit. It was always unhandy to have the baby cry when you are visiting family and stay on a camping (I also tried shh-pat then). Now we are staying in one place for a longer time and tried to give shh-pat another try but it always goes like this:
Our little boy shows his usual sleepy signals and I sing him his usual lullaby. But instead of putting him in the stroller and going for a walk I try to do the shh-pat over my shoulder and put him in his stroller when he starts to get a glassy look while continuing shh-pat. In the beginning he is fine with it and doesn't resist being put in the stroller. But after a while he gets more and more worked up and tired at the same time and starts crying. I take him out of the stroller and shh-pat him until he is calm and then put him back which results in an increase in crying every time. This cycle continues and he cries more and more every time I put him down.
So it feels like I really stress him a lot by trying to shh-pat. In the end he is so worked up and crying unconsolably. At that point I usually give him the breast because the whole procedure has taken so long that it is feeding time again and he seems so exhausted from the crying. After that he falls asleep in my arms while drinking...
In the evenings I have also tried to do the shh-pat instead of BF to sleep with the same result as described above...
Any suggestions on how to get out of this vicious circle without stressing our little boy even more?
I wish there was a way to do this without him working himself in hysterical crying because of being overtired.
Thanks for your advice
Greetings Dorit

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Re: Stroller naps and BF to sleep 5 month old -accidental parenting problem
« Reply #1 on: August 13, 2018, 07:05:56 am »
Hello and welcome to BW forums :)

Although the first A time is a bit longer than the guidance for his age it looks like it is resulting in a good nap. I wonder if really the next A time needs to be a bit longer too so that he can get another good nap rather than just 1hr?  What do you think?

With the sleep training.  I totally understand having LO sleep in the stroller, in fact mine refused to sleep in the stroller which caused me lots of difficulty so I ended up feeling I should have used it more so we could get out more rather than chained to the cot!
Are you using the stroller for all day and night sleep?  I see that with shush/pat you are putting down in the stroller so perhaps you are using it for all sleep just now like a crib?  To be honest, based on my own experience I think I'd continue to let him nap in the stroller as you have been and just rock it a little.  Rather than changing the way he falls to sleep by trying to shush/pat in arms you could instead reduce the movement of the stroller gradually over time so that if he is starting from a point of needing lots of movement you eventually end up with little or no movement needed and the ability for him to stay asleep through the transition from one sleep cycle to the next without necessarily having to rock or walk the stroller at the transition time.
The benefit of him having learned to sleep in the stroller (apart from giving you some freedom to get out) is that he has already learned to fall to sleep with his weight on a flat/mattress surface rather than in arms.  it seems counter productive at this point to now be teaching him to fall to sleep or become drowsy in arms before putting him down.  I think instead I would do the wind down the way you used to, a cuddle or song etc in arms, then into the stroller and move him in the there, but reduce the movement the way we would usually reduce shush/pat so that gradually he learns to sleep without it.
An additional 15 mins on his second A time increasing from 2hr 30 to 2hr 45 might help in extending the nap length and also in how much rocking/moving the stroller is needed.  Initially begin with lots of help, then gradually reduce.

If/when you want to transition to a cot or bed for naps and night sleep you can tackle that at the time.  Transitions from one sleep place to another can be difficult even with independent sleepers and you are not necessarily going to avoid that difficulty.  Having him trust in you and you being able to sooth him and support him will be the most helpful aspect of getting through changes will be the best start to any changes which might happen in the future.


Offline DoKi

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Re: Stroller naps and BF to sleep 5 month old -accidental parenting problem
« Reply #2 on: August 13, 2018, 12:34:26 pm »
Hello there and thanks a lot for your reply.
I do feel much better after reading your message!!!

Increasing his activity time to 2 hour 45 minutes may be a good idea. I usually start to sing his lullaby when I see that he is starting to yawn or becoming a bit cranky while playing.
Shh-pat sounded good in theory but it didn't work out for us that way due to circumstances.
So I'm extra glad that you suggest that it may be better to stick with our practice.
I will definitely try to gradually decrease the movement of the stroller.
Regarding your question: our little one sleeps in the stroller during the day because I want to give him some consistency and we go out regularly. He also used to sleep in the stroller when we were camping or stayed in a hotel for two weeks. So he is quite used to it.
But normally he sleeps in his co-sleeper during the night. 
I think that he really starts to understand what is going to happen when I put him in the stroller now. He often starts yawning more and more when I put him in there and rubs his eyes. After that he often tosses his head from left to right until finding a good sleeping position.

I suspect that he might be teething again. With his lower front teeth he had difficulties with sleeping and started waking up crying in the middel of the night. The last two evenings he also woke up every 45 minutes between 8 and 12 to drink. So it could be teething or the begining of a wonder week or a growth spurt?





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Re: Stroller naps and BF to sleep 5 month old -accidental parenting problem
« Reply #3 on: August 13, 2018, 15:28:10 pm »
Sounds like your LO is starting to self sooth with the head turning.
Also sounds like teething pain. Maybe try some meds?