How long before giving up on a nap 12 week old

[mothergoose]

Trying to teach 12 week old independent sleep... We have cheated so far with mainly sling for day naps and she feeds to sleep at night. She won't take a dummy. Have been doing pat shush in the cot and it works sometimes but sometimes not .... Like this morning tried for 2 hours!!! Then gave up as time to feed again... Fell asleep feeding of course. Feels like such a waste of time as now she has learnt if she protests long enough she will get fed to sleep?! But at what stage would you call it quits at this age and just apop the nap? Or would you just persist.... Have two older children so it's hard to devote so much time to it.
I think easy is OK... She has 1hr 30 A time and sleeps good 2 hours naps at this in the sling....
The other issue with the independent sleep is of course the 4t minute naps have started... So I feel like I'm spending soooo much time for such a short nap and it's disheartening  we have been trying pat shush for 5 days now... Any advice?

[mothergoose]

So today we are at 3.5hrs with still no nap.... I have got her up after awhile fed again changed Nappy just to get her out of this dark room feel so sorry for her 😞I feel like she doesn't know she's meant to sleep.... And doesn't seem to crash like other babies...
Do you give up on sleep training when they are really obviously overtired like this and just apop a nap or is that a step backwards? Anyone else's lo behave like this then suddenly get it?! I need encouragement as I am about to give up and get the sling😩

[boykelso]

Does she have any medical issues that could be preventing sleep?

At 12 weeks, I'd say if you can get one nap independently then you're doing fine.  You know from your other two that phases come and go... it's a tough situation.  I prioritize sleep over teaching sleep.  At 12 weeks, they're not really learning that crying gets them the boob and are still pretty malleable in terms of their habits.  Aim for one good nap a day and take a deep breath!  Hugs.

[mothergoose]

Thanks you! Wanted to reply to let you know the outcome in case anyone looking at this in the future.... She got it in the end.... Think we had an a time issue as well... Lengthened it by 10min and between that and just time for her to adjust she now sleeps well in her cot for daytime naps independently... Took about a week for her to get it for most naps and 2 weeks to get it consistently for anyone in same situation...there is hope