Here is one thing that might help. X needs a daily routine. Consistent. He has a lot in his life that changes and is out of his control. If you can, write down a reasonable routine and stick to it as much as possible. In fact, after you move, I would try to stick to it religiously for at least three weeks in a row and then after that you can be a little flexible. If he has a consistent flow to his days, he will know what is coming next and this will help him feel more secure in light of the fact that so much in his life does change. Write it down and even do pictures since he is three, he will be able to see his routine and "read" what happens next. This will also help you and your second little one as well. For instance, our daily routine looks a little like this:
Wake up
We read and get dressed.
Breakfast ~8:45
DD has independent playtime while I do dishes/clean kitchen.
We go upstairs and have playtime again while I do laundry or other chores or maybe take a shower. She can watch some TV at this time.
Morning snack ~10:30
Playtime with mom. We try to be outside for this one.
Lunch ~12:15
Nap ~1:00
Afternoon Snack
Playtime with mom. We try to be outside for this as well.
Independent playtime while mom makes dinner (she often needs more attention during this time... getting hungry and tired). She can watch a bit of TV at this time if she wants.
Dinner 6:30
Playtime hopefully with daddy, sometimes independent while mom cleans up the kitchen.
Bathtime 7:30
Bedtime. 8:30
A routine can stay the same no matter where you are, so it will add some consistency to his life and yours and that will make him feel more secure and safe. You can even schedule things like art time, reading time, game time. Just try to build time where you are playing with the kids and where they are also playing on their own so that you can get things done and spread the two out so that they are getting undivided attention from you periodically during the day.
Another idea I have is that perhaps one of your activities with him could be art time for daddy. He can make things to either send to him or perhaps you could keep a scrapbook together for daddy to see when he gets home. This might help him talk about how he misses his father and help him cope a bit.
Also, if you don't already have one, implement a bed time routine and be absolutely consistent in how it is performed each and everynight.
These are my ideas to help make things seem a bit more routine for your lo's. Knowing what is coming next will help set his "clock" for sleep as well. Even if he doesn't nap, he can have quiet reading time in his bed with some books. My experience with the preschoolers I taught is that they will go to sleep when there is nothing else for them to do. They are allowed to look at books, but they have to stay on their mats. Most of them sleep eventually.
After you get them on a nice routine, then we can talk about changing any sleep habits you would like to adjust. For instance, if you would like him to go to sleep on his own, that is a reasonable goal, but I think you need to establish a routine for him first and get this next move completed before tackling any major sleep problems.
I'm sorry this is so long... I just had some ideas and thought I would share them with you. Let me know if this sounds reasonable and if I can help you set up a routine
:wink:
