new baby....help

[Jakesmum040805]

hi everyone, have been having a quick flick through the forums and have found them very helpful. We brought baby Jake home only 2 days ago and he sleeps fine in the day, but refuses to sleep in his crib at night and one of us has to stay up holding him for him to sleep. We are obviously doing something wrong, we are trying to give him routine in the evenings and he sleeps for a few mins in his crib and then wakes up. please help some new parents who cannot find their copy of baby whisperer thanks

[jayne]

congratulations on your new baby  

you are not doing anything wrong.. i remember when we brought angela home from the hospital.. the first night she screamed all night long and i thought what on earth did i do??? what am i supposed to do with this baby???


are you swaddeling him?? is he in a crib or a craddle?? maybe he might do well  with one of those wedges??

[Samanthas mum]

First of all congratulations.

Secondly don't worry so much the first few weeks and try to chill a bit (I know that is hard).

For the first 2 nights in hospital my dd wouldn't sleep in her crib beside me and the only way I could get her to go to sleep was on me and even when we got home for the first few nights on and off she would only settle on me or my dh but at least once I was home he could help.

Similarly she would sleep ok in her moses basket during the day but I think that was because there was more background noise going on around her whereas at night it is normally much quieter. My midwife did remind me that for 9 months they are inside us with the constant sound of our heart beating and voice never far away so initally most babies hate it when it is really quiet and actually sleep better when there is some background noise going on

I think coming into the world is such a big shock for them that initally they need that extra contact and comfort. You also need to get some sleep whenever you can so for the first week or so I don't think it does them any harm if they need those extra cuddles at first and if your dh is on paternity leave he can help you with that so you can each get some sleep when it is not your turn.

After that you could start working on some of the babywhisperer principles and one which may help initally is swaddling as it will remind your little one of being in the womb.

My dd started settling into her crib much better after the first couple of weeks and although we have had our ups and downs along the way she goes to sleep on her own in her cot without too much fuss these days so the fact that she slept on us on and off for the first couple of weeks didn't do her any harm at all.

Good Luck

[Jakesmum040805]

thankyou so much guys, it means alot to hear other people having had same issues. it's a good job he's the most beautiful baby in the world he's in a cot and doesn't seem to like swaddling but we'll keep on it and I'm sure he'll be fine. thanks again

[Tori's Mom]

Might I suggest the book "Happiest Baby on the Block".  The ideas are very interesting and it worked for our dd.  Also wanted you to know that we co-slept with our dd until she was 3 months old and she has transitioned to her crib just fine.  She is now almost 5 months old and puts herself to sleep!!
Just know that the first 3 months are hard but you will miss all of the sweet cuddles before you know it.  When they "wake up" and notice there is a world surrounding them, they are too busy to snuggle up anymore
Tori's Mom

[Jakesmum040805]

thankyou everyone who took the time to reply to our post. Baby Jake is now 6 weeks old and things seem to be going much better. It is most reassuring to know there are so many people out there willing to pass on advice to newbie mums and dads. We hope you are all well and your little ones too.