Still wakes up crying and distressed

[kim&savannah]

I used to post a lot on the infant sleep boards--we had a horrible time getting Savannah to sleep through the night and go to sleep on her own, but after about 9 months of working on it, we are finally seeing some good results.  She goes down on her own with only a little whining (I think its her mantra cry), and even sleeps through the night about 4+ nights a week, or at least, we don't have to go in those nights--she still wakes crying about once a night, but often for only a few seconds. 

And she still wakes up in the morning crying and really upset.  She has woken up happy a few times in her life, but it makes me wonder if she is just never getting enough sleep?!  Or do some babies always wake up sad?  She sleeps from about 7:45/8 p.m. until 6/6:30, so she's usually only getting around 10, maybe 10.5 hours of sleep, which I know is on the shorter end for this age, but I don't see what I can do about it.  She takes 2 naps still, morning about 1.5 hours and pm, about 45 min.

Any ideas?

~Kim

[Tonya]

I don't have any ideas (sorry!) but am interested in seeing the replies.

My ds doesn't do this in the morning, but after every nap he wakes crying and sometimes hysterically.

I'll be watching!!!

[Estee]

hi my dd is 17 month and she to wakes up hysterical every morning, i have to stay in her room with her at night until she goes to sleep, she is constantly by my side she is very clingy, i thought it was seperation anxiety but she has been like this since birth?? it would be great for her to wake up in her room and just play or shout mummy not scream and scream, its good to know she's not the only one like this. x :?

[Nikki~Nathan&Danielle]

We've had sleep issues on and off for over a year (bedtime issues, multiple wakings during the night, early morning wakings or a combo of all at once!) and just in the last month things seem to have calmed down.  For a long time Nathan used to wake quite early (5-6am) and would wake crying or a loud whining (he was a great sleeper until 10mths old and would wake happy and chatting).  Anyhow, in the last month he started sleeping until close to 7am and actually woke happy and chatting again - we've done nothing different and he's still napping the same.  His seemed to be a VERY long phase.  If for some reason he does wake earlier now it is always with whining/crying - so I definitely think it's due to not enough sleep.  Sorry no advice on how to fix it though - but ours did tie in with the final 2yr molars all making an appearance.

[ForeverHopeful]

I know this was posted ages ago, but I noticed there weren't many replies after doing a search.

It's just that I have the same problem  It doesn't seem to matter if Owen gets 10hrs or 12hrs sleep, he still wakes crying.  It's come to a point now that I think I should at least try and resolve it, but I don't know how to do it 

We are transitioning to one nap at the moment and on daycare days we do have problems of overtiredness.  So I am very reluctant to try anything on those mornings.  But on the days that I know he has slept and eaten enough, what should I do?  He hardly ever sleeps until 7am but I find anything after 6am acceptable.  This morning it was 5.45am but he only slept 1hr at nursery yesterday    I can't blame him for the disruption to his routine, so I cuddled him, gave him some milk and took him into bed with me.  I KNOW!!!  Not the thing to do, but I wasn't ready to start me day at that time.  He lay until 6.30 am happily cuddling in 

Owen's routine:
6/7am~wakes crying  7oz milk
7.30am~breakfast
9.30am~nap for 20 mins
12pm~lunch
12.45pm~nap
2.30pm~wake and snack
5pm~dinner
6pm~bath followed by 7oz milk
7pm~bedtime

On daycare days I sometimes have to put him to bed by 6.30pm because his nap has been so short.  I get so angry when that happens because I want to spend the quality time with him.  So where are we going wrong that he always wakes crying?  He seems happy at other times.  I wonder whether it's because I have always gone to him first thing in the morning without leaving him for a bit 

Sorry for the babble.  It's sometimes hard to get the thoughts in your head down in a post 

Thanks for any input  Laura x

[Cecilia~Olivia's mom]

hi Kim.  I'd suggest maybe transitioning to one nap?  I found Olivia did start sleeping better through the night & was able to self soothe herself through the night wakings.  Yes she still wakes 0-3 times per night, but now she takes care of this on her own, unless there are tummy, teeth or blanket issues.

Olivia goes through her phases, was happy chatty for a while 9-13mos upon waking, now the miserable bear again...not fun or doesn't help getting the day off to a positive start.  We just try to get her mind of her misery by being "quietly silly & maybe get a giggle out of her"...sometimes it works.  I think maybe our lo's are just very outspoken babes & feel the need to share their every emotion with us, no matter what time of day.  this is frustrating of course, but lets also note our own temperaments too.  I know I'm whiny when tired or just not feeling like a hallmark card in the morning, even if i supposedly had a good nights sleep, so I just believe I should be happy Olivia shares her feelings rather than not & this will help our relationship as she matures into a little girl, then a young lady.  I never want her to be afraid to tell me anything, so if this is an example of her feeling 'comfort & secure' by telling me how she feels (via whining/screaming/frustration , I'll accept it & not read too much into it.  (Did any if that make sense to anyone else but me? ) Anyhow, I've noticed if there's a cold or milestone, developmental, memory of some sort, teeth growth spurt/growing pains/hunger, especially when one or more of these issues are at play,  Olivia is usually tired/grumpy upon waking, sometimes affecting most parts of the day-  is a side effect of a mentioned issue - which we are constantly trying to make better. Olivia generally sleeps 10 hrs at night with one 2 hr 15min nap. Only if she is having a 'grumpy' day, nap will be 2.5-3hrs long, otherwise she will not be ready for bed at the appropriate time.
I'm not sure this helps, but know that you are not alone.

[Cecilia~Olivia's mom]

Hi again.  Hey Kim, you probably have this sorted out, didn't realize how the original post was.
Foreverhopeful - I now i did not offer any solutions, hope things get better.  Owen just wants mamma to know how he's feeling.  Let's hope our lo's are the same way when they are teenagers & young adults.  It's frustrating isn't it.  we figure there should be an end to this by now, they are not babies any more so our tolerance level shrinks a bit?

Naps are definitely a factor, but if you can't control that because of daycare, it may be tough.  I do believe your lo will get used to it (I know other babes in similar situations as Owen & they adjusted.  Earlier bed times helped but it doesn't make you feel like you are spending time with him & if you do get some time he's doing what I call the "toddler colic" - same time as when they were babies .  stop feeling guilty, it's making you sad, you are doing the best you can & if you go in first thing when he is calling out in an urgent matter, he NEEDS you.  Trust me, there will come a day where you will go in at the same times wondering why he ISN'T"T calling out for you.  That's what happens to me...

[ForeverHopeful]

Cecilia~Yeh, this was an old post  But I was doing a search to find some answers instead of starting a new thread.  I'm feeling pretty stressed about the situation.

Although, this morning, for the first time in weeks and weeks, I heard Owen mumbling away to himself and not immedialtely crying.  It was 6.15am and he'd been in bed from 6.30 last night so I went and got him.  It was fantastic    I was OTT nice to him and singing and dancing on our way to get his milk 

The only thing that was different last night was that I really persevered when feeding him his dinner and he ate loads.  So he didn't wake up hungry?  He certainly didn't guzzle down his milk like he usually does.  So it would seem that my poor boy was hungry.  I still had the early bedtime though.  Daycare only had him sleep between 12pm and 1pm so he was very tired 

I'm really struggling with the lack of quality time right now.  It's making me snap at my husband over stupid things and just generally making me feel really down    I need to give up work 

[Cecilia~Olivia's mom]

Hi Laura.  glad to hear you had a better day...gives you hope & renewed strength - now if only you can get a few days like that in a row.  At Owens age, I found Olivia was going through TONS of things all at once. OMG, wasn't it exhausting for us both!  So factor in the poor naps, you have a monster.  Maybe if you can try/help him have great naps on the weekend (like you're not run ragged already, I know ), he can figure out that he can nap well on his own at daycare?  unless daycare does not provide a safe/comfy/sleeping quarter??
I know this does not help & I can just say that he will not be on naps forever, but while he needs them he should have them & the better they are the better he may be to cope...and you to of course .  Olivia is in private care just for the sake of naps.  It's worth the money even though I have not bought anything new for myself since she was born, but it's a great investment for me.  When she's not napping anymore, she can come shopping with me & hold the bags - she owes me, lol