I take it back.........this is REALLY REALLY HARD!!!

[marylou]

Hi again,


This afternoon,....I got him to nap for the third time today....I stayed in the room like this AM....(see previous post)......and he jolted awake.  I attempted the EXACT SAME technique as this AM....and he ended up screaming, choking and almost vomiting, during pu/pd and shhh/pat...for about 45 min...then I changed his diaper and brought him downstairs for a feed....

...we had quiet playtime downstairs and then he was yawning and rubbing his eyes....upstairs again we went......put on soft music....in chair...etc etc....then the screaming bloody murder started again.....I ended up doing pu/pd etc for ONE HOUR AND 10 MINUTES....and thought my head was going to split off!!  He was sooooo upset the whole time, that I could not leave the room....

I had him in my arms for lengthy periods of time....as he WOULD NOT STOP CRYING.....NOTHING WAS working....he finally tired his purple little self out and fell asleep and has been asleep for 44 minutes....I am NOT feeling up to going into his room and breaking my back again..leaning over his crib only to have to hold him and listen to him scream for another hour...only to have him NOT go back to sleep.

I CANNOT BELIEVE HOW HARD THIS is!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What am I doing wrong???

He DOES sleep very well through the night........perhaps he is just a 30 minute napper and I should keep him on the 3 hour EASY..........I just thought it would be nice to have a life and some "me" time,...but I guess not................I feel pretty low right now and to top it off....my husband is away out of town for the next 3 days and NIGHTS!!  God help me.


Thanks for reading my rant
 :cry:  :cry:  :cry:

[cwolff]

Wow, you have some patience!  I would never have been able to see it thru for so long.  I have a question since I didn't read your earlier post.  How old is your son?  And you are doing nap training only, not weaning him off a prop?  Is he going do and sleeping for 30 min and then you have the screaming, or is it before the nap always.  Let me know and I'll see if I have any words of wisdom.

[marylou]

Hi,

Thanks for reading my rant!  He is 17 weeks old and was born a month premature.  (So, he is either 4months or 3 months...depending on how you look at it).

I have been feeding a bit before nap time......only started this recently...like for maybe 4 days....so I don't think that is the problem...although I am sure he having a growth spurt.

He is generally REJECTING his dummy.....so that is not being used...and if it is occassionally...only for  like 2 minutes at a time and then he spits it out and does not want it!  He uses it to calm down sometimes...but not to sleep ever.

I just got him to bed (hopefully for the night)...at 750pm....and he is breastfed and bottlefed.  He drank both RB and LB 10 minutes each AND 5 OZ at 5pm and then another 5 OZ at 6:45pm.

I hope this helps you help me!! 

THANKS AGAIN!!

[Colesmom]

had two fantastic morning naps.

then i ttried to keep his feed schedule as close to four hours as i could, and I missed his window for his third nap :shock:   I think it took 35 minutes of pure $$%%$#^ to get him down, then I did the same thing you did, went in at 40 min to use same technique.  I think a floor board squeaked and he woke before my hand was on him.  50 minutes of shh/pat, pu/pd and i gave up.

my mistake though was letting him on the floor during the break.  he rolled and creeped around like never before.  I should have made it quiet time-i'm so dumb.

up for catnap...i think it took 45 min.  so i had to WAKE HIM UP after 40 minutes to feed.  I think you could have run a train through the room and he wouldn't have budged.  I put him down for the night 30 minutes early.  it took 35 minutes.  boy oh boy, we've had the same kind of day!

is it your 4th or 5th day?  even though i was using the wrong technique for a few days i think this might count as the 5th day and boys usually regress on the 4th or 5th.

keep it up, it has GOT to get better, right!

[jennc123]

Do you swaddle him?  that may help, I am having some problems with my daughter as far as napping but i did swaddle her for the first 4 months of her life and it did wonders and she was alot happier.  I am a firm believer in it.  I think with small, premature babies it really helps, Good Luck to you! sorry I couldn't be much help :?

[Meg's Mom]

Set backs are to be expected, but don't give up now!

You may decide that you will only do nap training for the first nap (as that one develops first) and that is totally fine!  Cuz yes, it is hard and you can expect it to take at least 2 weeks!!  Nap training is the hardest, worse then night waking since you have such a short window and they aren't as tired.  So don't feel like you aren't doing it right.  It is just plain hard work.  But it will be worth it, i promise!

[Colesmom]

please tell me I read that right!

I am working on so many things at once that I think DS doesn't know what's going on.  Was feeding on 3 hour schedule, but his sleep was all over the place.  would sometimes stay up 1 hour, sometimes 2 but for the last 6 weeks or so (he's 5 months next week) he's only slept 45 minutes and started waking in the night.

so i'm trying to fix 45 minute naps, trying to teach him to sleep with shh/pat and pupd, and only two weeks ago maybe removed the swaddle completely as he was breaking free.

If I only have to fight for the morning nap for now that would make things so much easier.  he settled back for 2 morning naps yesterday no problem, but then i fought him for afternoon and catnap.  maybe he's just not ready.  I'm so worried though that if i let one nap go to 45 minutes then they all will, no?

thanks for any help, AGAIN!  gosh, you'd think i didn't have a brain in my head.

Traci

[Matthew's Mommy]

HOw is today? Did it get better or stay the same?

[juliecheeto]

Have you tried room darkening during naps? I find that my older DS sleeps longer whith a really really dark room.
Also if you think he still needs a swaddle you might want to try a miracle blanket or something similar that has velcro or something so baby can't break free.

[Colesmom]

i didn't fight his naps.  4 45 min and a 30 min (he was tired and tried to settle back but couldn't.  woke at 5:20 though instead of 3 or 4 so that's good.

just had a nightmare of a time getting him down for the night though.

I am really doubtin myself.  I was trying to let him settle himself more and he was screaming his head off :cry:

[Meg's Mom]

Hi, sorry to hear you had a really, really bad day  :cry: .

Yes, you read me correct.  You CAN decide to work on just the one nap.  It may take longer (or not) but it may help you keep your sanity.  The am nap usually develops first (I also found this to be true). 

I would HIGHLY recommend you go back to swaddling!  As suggested above, try the miracle blanket for 4mos+ or the Auzzie (spelling??, search on BW site).

We have been there and understand what a difficult time this is, but I promise...you both will survive.  I had a really difficult time from 3-6.5mos, but after teaching Megan to sleep independently and getting over the 45min naps she was a dream!  And still is  :wink:

[Matthew's Mommy]

Oh no.. I remember those days.. they were hard.

How does he settle into sleep? 

You're in the thick of it right now.  I would  concentrate on the  falling asleep independently, in most cases with an infant over 4 months, that helps to eliminate the 45 min. nap, and the awake time.

So..

1. Extend awake time until he is at 2 hours
2. Independently falling asleep

Don't worry about the 45 min. mark right now.. just concentrate on those two things. At the 45 min. mark, give him a chance to resettle.. and if he doesn't within 10 min. then if you feel you can, then do pu.pd for the duration of the other sleep cycle.. but that's only if you feel you can handle it.

This is going to get better.. you are in the middle of it right now.

Hang in there and big hugs!

[emilieh]

I think I'm in the same boat as colesmom. My DD is four months old and over the past six weeks her sleep has gone from great to horrible. I've been trying to put her on the 4-hour EASY but she's really struggling. Now she's waking several times a night to eat (she's breast and bottle fed) and her naps are down to 30 minutes. Today I could only get her to take three 30-minute naps! She's absolutely screaming and I almost couldn't get her down for those, let alone extend them!

I did take away her paci three weeks ago, but today was so awful I broke down and gave it to her again.

Any advice? She was a great sleeper until about six weeks ago, but now it just seems to get worse and worse. Please help! I'm pulling my hair out!

Emilie
Mom to Reese, born 4/22/05
Sydney, 1/24/02

[Colesmom]

Hi,

Cole has gone down great for two naps.  barely a peep.  His morning nap was a bit of a struggle, not sure if he was up too long or not long enough (1.75 hours) but he slept 1.5 hours after waking and crying for 3 min. at the 30 min mark.

His second nap he was up 2 hours and only lasted 45 min.  He almost settled back but i didn't force him.

Just now he went down in 3 min. and he had been up 2hr 10min.  wanted him up 2.5 hrs, but he fussed during wind down.

That's key too.  I now start a windown 30 min. before i want him to sleep. I sing, read books, recite nursery rhymes downstairs. Then head up to his room for Good Night Moon and Twinkle Twinkle Little star. This seems to have helped immensely.  Not to mention because the wind down is so long...if i've kept him up a bit too long...i'm still likely in the previous window...if you know what i mean.  he fussed after 10 min. of wind down so i put him right in the crib.

Hope this helps. 

Traci