i hate to beat a dead horse, but this is hurting my brain

[Colesmom]

Hi,

I'm not sure which book i read that Tracy considers "sleeping through the night" is missing one feed cycle.  Is that the case with older babies?

If I'm just working on getting DS on the 4 hour EASY then obviously all his feeds aren't yet 4 hours apart and therefore, how can I expect him to go from 11pm DF until 7 am.  If he goes until 5:30 (like he did today) or 6:00 am, what is the sense in trying to force him back to sleep until 7?  Am I right in thinking this is what I'm supposed to do?  then if he's had 10 minutes sleep, wake him up?  is forcing him to sleep until 7 going to make him ignore his hunger at 6:00 if this is when he needs to eat?

OH, and one other thing.  IF I feed him at 5:30 or 6:00....do I then top him up at 7:00 as this is his scheduled feed?  or will i make him a snacker?

do you get what i'm saying?  I'm on track for everything else.  it's just this part that i'm still really struggling with.

thanks again!!!

Traci

[kellyhushhh]

Somebody correct me if i am wrong but if he is hungry at 5.30am/6am i would feed him then straight back to bed and wake him up at 7am and give him a top up feed to get him back on track for 11am.  If he is waking and not hungry then you need to do pu/pd or if you want to start your day at 6am you could but 7am is lots better!!! Hope this helps

Kelly xx

[Colesmom]

I should have fed him at 5:20 today i guess, but i tried pupd until 6.  then fed him...then did pupd again until 6:50 when he fell asleep.
I guess i was supposed to get him up at 7, but after struggling so hard to go down, how could I?

i guess i'll get to know his cries better as i go...

and about the top up, i hope that's right...i just edited my post asking that question as well.

thanks for the response.

Traci

[Deb_in_oz]

my understanding is "sleeping through" means going 5-6 hrs in one stretch (for some this is 7pm - 2 or 3am) that is why with the DF for many babies it shifts the 5-6 hr burst to post 11pm which works better for parents. eventually the long stretch of sleep extends until it is 9-12 hrs.


it is a misconception that Tracey means for every baby to start  the day at 7. if your lo makes it to 5:30/6am you feed him, but it is up to you when to start your day. she just uses 7am as an arbitrary starting point so she can illustrate routines.

you have several options

 :arrow: feed at 5:30/6 as you would for any night feed and then put him back to bed and wake him to start the day at a time that will work for you - generally a time between 7 and 8am works for most, some choose a later time. yes you just fed at 5:30 or 6 but he will feed again (and you could wake him at 7 but wait to feed until 7:30, etc) and then get on track.  using this method you trust that eventually as baby grows and sleeps longer he will start to sleep all the way to your chosen start time (or thereabouts)

OR

 :arrow: leave him in cot and see if he resettles or escalates and then get him up around 6 and just start your day from there (day feed not a night feed) and hope that eventually he will go longer but might not...

OR

 :arrow: some people will try to resettle baby until closer to 7am, but personally i don't believe in this because if he is hungry and it has been several hours since last feed then i think you shoudl feed the baby. delaying it can actually backfire if he does not resettle and by the time you decide to give in and get him up he is then too exhausted to feed properly  (JMO)

[Colesmom]

Debra,

I think I am trying way to hard to follow exact numbers and i'm forgetting my instincts.  Thank you so much for helping me see the light.

My DS was feeding every 3 hours before last Thursday, but his naps and nightime were erratic so it's hard to get into a routine.  he was only sleeping 45 min. at a time.  I just checked my log...sometimes he'd be up 1 hour, sometimes 2.  He had no trouble falling asleep because it was in my arms

I guess I'm trying to do too much at once.  get him on a routine, and doing pupd to help his naps and teach him to go to sleep.

so much for such a little guy.

thanks again.  i appreciate the quick response.  i really needed encouragement this morning.

Traci

[carasmom]

I am curious... when does he go to bed for the night? 
At the 5/6 mark, I would just feed him, change him, with NO stimulation or lights, make it all business, just like a night time feed- then back to bed.  My dd woke at 5:30/6 to feed until about 6 months, even when she was sleeping from 7/7:30 pm with no other night wakings.  She eventually stopped it.  I usually started waking her after she had 12 hours of night sleep (including wakings), so that we could try to get decent naps in.  With that said, her 45 minute naps went to 30 minutes until 9 months.  SO- don't be too hard on yourself, you can teach him how to put himself to sleep, but sometimes they make their own sleeping routines.
Hang in there-
Trish

[Colesmom]

I put him down at 7:00 last night after a 30 min. catnap from 5:15-5:45.  Might have been too early after nap but he seemed really tired.
That's what I'm struggling with right now.  He seems tired, but am I putting him down to soon? 

last night at bedtime was a nightmare...40 min. of struggle.  didn't wake up at DF THANK GOD, does anyone else stress about the DF as much as I do, PRAYING their lo doesn't wake up!

he woke at 4:00 again. had done so two nights, then slept til 5:20, now 4:00 again.  he cooed and played and babbled and cried out a few times (soft cries) so i left him.  at 4:45 he cried out for me.  I went in and he was stuck in the corner of the crib (newfound mobility issues)  I checked his diaper and he was wet.  changed him and he had pooed too!  HUGE THICK poop.  Does poop change around 5 months?  This week since sleep training it has changed.  I wonder if it's stress?  or the fact that he is getting more sleep?  hmmmm?  anyway, he hasn't pooed in the middle of the night since about 4 weeks!  anyway, at the point it was close enough to 5:00. I fed him, put him back down at 5:10.  He let out a couple of protest cries and voila, eyes closed at 5:20 without any reassurance from me.  slept til 6:40.

this mornings nap is another story. I aimed for 1.75 hours awake...and he was rubbing his eyes and almost fell asleep feeding. One HOUR screaming on and off.  he seemed to want to settle about 10 times and in fact was asleep once until the 10 minute jolt and cried again for 3 minutes before finally settling in.  THEN, 30 min. he was up!  WHAT!!!  now he's napping only 30!  i went in and sat with him, let him cry for 3 minutes...and he went back to sleep.  woo hoo!  I am really hoping he extends this to 1.5 hours because he really needs it.

anyhoo...that was my night/morning.

Traci