Author Topic: When its ok to leave them....crying question  (Read 1231 times)

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Offline hana1978

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When its ok to leave them....crying question
« on: September 05, 2005, 07:19:52 am »
Tracey says you shouldnt leave a baby to cry for any length of time but what about when there calling out to you but its still not an all out cry?  Do i/can i ignore to see if they settle?  My DS will let out a really loud AGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGH then it will go quiet for a couple of seconds before he does it again - it sounds pretty urgent but the fact that hes quiet inbetween suggests its a fake cry.
Any suggestions/advice?  Im not sure weather to go in and try to settle or leave him be.
Hana.xx

Offline LisaM

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When its ok to leave them....crying question
« Reply #1 on: September 05, 2005, 08:38:00 am »
I will normally hold back rushing in if its not a constant scream as quite often if dd does a few cries out like that with gaps in between she will settle herself back off to sleep.  I have sometimes gone in when she does that kind of thing only to find she is actually still half asleep and I disturb her!


Offline Colesmom

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that's what i'm struggling with too Hana
« Reply #2 on: September 05, 2005, 14:22:21 pm »
sometimes i really think i'm interfering.  still working on getting to know his cries.  i'm just inconsistent.  sometimes i let him cry a couple of minutes, sometimes i pat/shh.  hmmmm, it'll take some adjusting for the both of us i guess.  i just feel bad for him because I'm the one who is supposed to guide and teach him and I just feel like I'm messing things up every second day :oops:

I was near tears sitting next to his crib last night at 3:30 am...knowing he wouldn't go back to sleep until 4.  I just wish i could sort out the night waking...with a full nights sleep (or even just 5 hours) I think I'd be okay dealing with the naps.

here's to a better day hopefully.

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Offline Colesmom

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i was interfering...
« Reply #3 on: September 05, 2005, 18:19:56 pm »
he's gone down for two naps today while i left the room.  i went in once the first time, gave a quick shh/pat and left and he was out within the minute.  (of course, it was only a 30 min nap darnit)

the nap just now, he fussed about 15 min. on and off.  i didn't go back in.  he's asleep now.

i think i'm getting the hang of it...but it's still hard to tell.  due to 2 short naps (45 and 30) it's only 2:20 and he's on his catnap :shock:   i'm hoping it will be 1.5 hours long to try to get back on schedule for a 6:30 bedtime (trying that tonight to see if he'll sleep longer)
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Offline Matthew's Mommy

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When its ok to leave them....crying question
« Reply #4 on: September 05, 2005, 20:06:21 pm »
To be honest with you, it depends on the age, and type of cry.  If it's I need you now type of cry.. then be there. If it;s a newborn, then provide support. But if it's an older infant, who knows how to self soothe, and it's just a fuss or a call out cry at night.. then I hold back. But if it turns into a I need you! then I'm there.

It's really a judgement call!
Jane
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Matthew July 27th, 2001
Brendan October 21st, 2004