Author Topic: How to sleep train a 20mth old??  (Read 2061 times)

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Offline tayla's mummy

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How to sleep train a 20mth old??
« on: September 10, 2005, 05:27:32 am »
Hi Everyone,

I am new here, this is my first post. So, hello everybody! :D

My daughter, 20 months has always woken a lot during the night (currently about 5 times a night). Im not sure what i should be doing? Is she too old for PUPD? ( I know she is too heavy!!)
It is getting to the point now where i am so tired, that i am considering leaving her to cry. :cry:  I work fulltime and i go to work everyday tired and grumpy. Usually i just bring her into bed with me because its easy....
and a lot of the time i give in and let her have a bottle. (naughty i know)

I guess i just dont know where to start. She goes down for  her sleeps quite easily without any dramas, but when she wakes during the night she can never re settle.
She is not a baby anymore and i really cant go on sleep deprived for much longer. Any suggestions would be appreciated please.

Thanks :D

Offline elfin

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How to sleep train a 20mth old??
« Reply #1 on: September 10, 2005, 10:31:25 am »
Hello,

Have you read any of Tracy's books, or are you familiar with her methods?  I would recommend her 3rd book, as she deals with situations like yours.

What does her day look like, nap, bedtime?  What is her bedtime routine, and does she fall asleep independently?

Post back with some details and we'll try to help!
Carrie

Myles 12/06/03

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Offline Khyan & Sahria's mum

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How to sleep train a 20mth old??
« Reply #2 on: September 10, 2005, 12:25:28 pm »
Yep like Carrie I am interested in what her day looks like ?

Other questions I would have is:

Is she still in a cot ?


Quote (selected)
She goes down for her sleeps quite easily without any dramas, but when she wakes during the night she can never re settle.

How does she go down - what is your routine ?



You also said that at the moment she wakes about 5 times per night, previous to this what was her sleep like?

Could it possibly be 2 yr molars ?

And finally - I'm from Perth too, so hello neighbour I'm in Canningvale how bout you ?
Michaela
Khyan & Sahria's Mummy




Offline tayla's mummy

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How to sleep train a 20mth old??
« Reply #3 on: September 11, 2005, 05:27:58 am »
Hi and thanks for all that replied to me!

Our routine is something like this:

Wake between 5.30 and 6.00am :shock:
6.00 breakfast and i get ready for work and get Tayla dressed
Arrive daycare at 7.30 am, Tayla is there until 4.00pm
Bath at 5.00pm and a play with mum and dad
Dinner at 6ish
Bedtime usually at 7pm (or if she has woken later than usual i will leave it til 7.30)

She has a bottle before her nap and sleep (but not in the cot) and then she is put into the cot with her dolly. Usually asleep within 10mins. Talks and babbles to herself before drifting off.
 She isnt really attached to the doll but i decided to try this out to see if it would help with the night wakings. :?
I leave a night light on in her room (very soft one), so i dont think its that she is afraid of the dark.
She has never slept through since she was born, so i believe she is waking purely from habit.
She does still have a few molars to get though, so possibly this is making it worse.  ( i give her nurofen when teething)
She is still in a cot (which i think maybe she has a bad association with, from previous sleep training attempts  :( )   Hope i answered everyones questions!!

Michaela, i am in Willetton. So just around the corner from you. Small world hey....


Thanks
Lara

Offline tayla's mummy

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How to sleep train a 20mth old??
« Reply #4 on: September 11, 2005, 05:30:11 am »
Also meant to say that i am fairly familiar with Traceys sleep methods. I have read the first book  :)

Offline tayla's mummy

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How to sleep train a 20mth old??
« Reply #5 on: September 14, 2005, 04:32:54 am »
Anybody? I have just bought tracey's 2nd book and apparently i should be doing PD instead of PUPD?
Can anybody share a sleep success with a toddler this age?

Thanks
Lara

Offline Freyamum

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Night wakings
« Reply #6 on: September 14, 2005, 14:40:05 pm »
Hi there, I had little success with PD in the end - it worked for a bit but when she saw me coming she'd throw herself back in a fit and refuse to lie down at all. So we went through a period where she would only sleep in with us ( :roll: ) as she REFUSED to get into the cot due to bad association too. SO at 20 months we bought her a bed, and it's made a real difference (we put her in her own room too as we'd just got it ready from moving into the house) and it's made a real difference I think. She used to be up about 4 times a night and now as long as nothing's troubling her unduly she'll only be up once  :P Bliss!! Maybe worth a try?? Mum says we all hated the cot too!

Offline elfin

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How to sleep train a 20mth old??
« Reply #7 on: September 14, 2005, 17:14:17 pm »
Hi Lara,

So she is falling asleep on her own than at the beginning of the night, and it's just the nightwakings that are the issue?  Sorry, I just want to clarify.
You said that sometimes you give her a bottle when she wakes?  This could be the problem.  It is amazing when they get to this age, that they can pick up a habit sooo quickly.  So basically you need to decide a plan of action so to speak to deal with the nightwakings and then stick to it.  You're right at this age it is more of PD.  I don't know the temperment of your daughter, but my son would get more upset and confused if I stayed with him in the room.  So I would put him down, leave, wait until he started crying/fussing, go back in lay him back down, say "night-night", and then leave again.  Sometimes this would take a few times, but as I have said before I needed to give him the clear message that it is time to sleep, and that he is not getting any more attention than that from me.

So as long as you're sure she is not sick, and if you think she is teething give some pain meds, and then come up with a plan.

We are all here to support you, so if you need more help or clarification, then let us know!
Carrie

Myles 12/06/03

elfin@thebabywhisperer.com

Offline tayla's mummy

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How to sleep train a 20mth old??
« Reply #8 on: September 15, 2005, 05:55:06 am »
Hi again, thanks for the replies.
Well, the night wakings have been even more frequently lately.
I must admit that i took some wrong advice on the weekend a left her to cry it out for a few hours, which now seems to have made things even worse.  :cry:   She will not go down for a sleep by herself anymore as obviously she doesnt trust me ( i am assuming).
It definatly might be time for a big bed as she is just so afraid of the cot now. I cant believe it has come to all this. I really thought she would be a good (or better) sleeper at this age....... :shock:

On Friday night i will start PD and sleep in her room to re assure her that i wont leave. Or should i wait until i have bought her a bed? It is very hard to lay her down at the moment as she just arches her back or hangs on to me!!
Help :?

Lara

Offline abwalk

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How to sleep train a 20mth old??
« Reply #9 on: September 18, 2005, 12:33:04 pm »
When my son was doing this, I ended up sleeping in his room for a week or two.  He woke up so frequently that it wasn't worth it for me to go back to my own room!  Anyway, after a few days he would sit up and see that I was still there and go back to sleep on his own without all of the crying and trying to get out of his crib.  A few more days of sleeping in his room and he quit waking up to make sure I was still there.

Offline SurfBowlSC

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How to sleep train a 20mth old??
« Reply #10 on: September 21, 2005, 16:37:04 pm »
We're having a similar issue with our 21 month old daughter.

The routine is fairly simple:
I get home between 6.30 and 7.  If it's 6.30 we play for a bit and then bath around 7.  If I get in at 7, then we have 5 mins downstairs then bath.
By 7.30 she's in bed with a bottle of milk and I read a story or two.
Normally she'll finish the milk, hand it over and take a dummy.
Then I'll carry on reading until she's asleep.

However, over the last couple of week's she's been waking and taking AGES to get back to sleep.
Give her more milk and it's not so bad. Do that though and she won't have breakfast in the morning!

Last night we gave her extra milk when she woke at 1, but by 1.30 she was calling her mum.  Mum went in but I took over much to our daughter's disgust.
I eventually got her calm and she fell asleep with me on the bed....

We're averaging about 4 hours sleep at the moment, and surely by now she should be going right through.

She's not eating much either during the day!!!
Not even going for snack options which she would normally do as well as meals.

Offline Matthew's Mommy

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How to sleep train a 20mth old??
« Reply #11 on: September 25, 2005, 01:15:23 am »
It doesn't sound like a hunger issue.. more like a sleep issue.

Has she ever slept through the night? Is this a new occurence?

Also, does she normally fall asleep on her own, or do you stay with her until she is deep sleep?
Jane
Whispering since 2001
Matthew July 27th, 2001
Brendan October 21st, 2004

Offline tayla's mummy

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How to sleep train a 20mth old??
« Reply #12 on: September 26, 2005, 04:19:53 am »
Hi Matthews Mommy

Wasnt sure if you were posting to myself or SurbowlSC!

But, if you are offering me advice i will take it. LOL
My daughter has never slept through the night. Maybe 2 or 3 times, but im not exactly counting that.
She was pretty good at putting herself to sleep until recently (i tried a bit of controlled crying) and everything has now gotten so much worse.
I made the switch to a toddler bed(which she seems to love during the day) . She plays on it and everything, but come sleep time all hell breaks loose, she arches her back and crawls out of the bed and SCREAMS. Its like she is so afraid of sleeping. :shock:
I know that i am going to have to do PD and sleep in her room (probably for quite  a long time!), but i just feel to tired to do it. Its like a vicious circle isnt it?
 Oh well, guess i will get there eventually