Author Topic: Please help - Awake screaming all night at 9 months  (Read 949 times)

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Offline Immie's Mum

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Please help - Awake screaming all night at 9 months
« on: September 13, 2005, 14:10:52 pm »
Hi there - I am new to this board and am DESPERATE for help!

My daughter Imogen is 9 months old and she has never been the most settled of sleepers at night, although from the early days she only woke 2 or 3 times a night.

After an ear infection when she was 4 moths old I let her sleep in bed with us - it was the only way to get her to sleep (I know, I know - this is where my problems stem from! -  accidental parenting!) and now she absolutely won't go into her cot in her own room at night. 

We have been trying for a few weeks now - being consistent, refusing to let her out of her cot at night but her night routine has deteriorated to a few hours of sleep from about 8.30pm - midnight (just enough to take the edge of her tiredness) and then she wakes up pretty much every hour and screams for about an hour and a half and then goes into an exhausted sleep for another hour then up screaming for another hour and a half.  She screams so much her throat is raw!    We have tried everything I can think of - PU/PD, rubbing her back, soothing her, one of us stays in the room.  She is fine if my husband or I pick her up and goes instantly to sleep - as soon as you try and put her down the screaming starts again. I have even resorted to controlled crying although I hated it - I just spent the whole night with tears rolling down my face!

She has a night light and a blanket that I slept with.  She isn't hungry and if we do allow her to come into our room she is out like a light! I have spoken to the Health Visitor but  she couldn't offer any suggestions.

My husband and I are walking zombies, trying to take it in turn to get a few hours sleep but it seems to be getting worse - Immie can put herself to sleep, she does it during the day just fine, it is just at night.  It is getting to the stage where I just feel like sitting in a corner and crying I am so sleep deprived and my husband is now fairly incapable of forming sentences!

During the day - Immie has no problem napping - she is on a loose E.A.S.Y scheme - where she is awake for about 2-3 hours then has about 1-2 hour nap.  Her last nap of the afternoon usually ends at about 4.00-4.30pm and then she is up until about 8pm which is a bit longer than her usual 2-3 hours.

Does anyone have any suggestions - I am fresh out of ideas :cry: .



Offline georgia's mama

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Please help - Awake screaming all night at 9 months
« Reply #1 on: September 13, 2005, 16:48:56 pm »
:cry: so sorry to hear that things are so hard right now...i haven't had too much experience with something like this but just to let you know that we all go through hard times like these and it will get better.

what are her naps like during the day?  maybe jot down her schedule for a few days to see if her routine could be adjusted in any way. i know that when i figured it was one thing it always had to do with some thing else or something we did by accident or didn't really notice.

what's her bedtime routine like?  is she teething?  maybe try some motrin or tempra.

PU/PD is tough ...i know...i wasn't very successful with it myself but when she got older the PD part worked good.  before that though we ended up doing a version of it where we actually left the room and came back in, in 2 or 3 minute intervals and it took some time for her to understand we weren't going to pick her up.

all i can say is good luck and i hope some of this helps...let me knw if you have any other questions.
loving my baby girl

Offline sara_derek

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Please help - Awake screaming all night at 9 months
« Reply #2 on: September 13, 2005, 18:46:11 pm »
HI Lisa,

I'm so sorry you're going through this!  It seems to me that you and your daughter are both confused on how to handle these night wakings.  You've tried so many things, but have you actually given them a solid go?  Pu/pd takes extreme consisitency and time.  With those two ingredients, though, it usually works, unless you have a very touchy baby.  I also think maybe bed time could be moved up to 7:00 or so.  She is definitely over tired by the time you get her into bed because of that last 4 1/2 hour stretch.  That's probably too long for her right now, especially at the end of the day. 

I would start by moving up her bed time, getting a solid bedtime routine into play if you don't have one yet and keeping activities in the evening low key as much as you can.

Then, I would give pu/pd another try.  You have to FULLY commit to it though.  IF you don't think you can handle it for the long run, don't start or everything will just get worse.  Remember you are doing this to teach your dd that you will be there for her when she cries, but that it is OK to go to sleep and STAY asleep in her crib by herself.  She just needs to re-learn where to sleep. 

Keep us posted and let us know how you are doing.

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Offline Katet

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Please help - Awake screaming all night at 9 months
« Reply #3 on: September 14, 2005, 10:38:16 am »
I just wanted to add if she has been sleeping in your bed & given her age & the fact you did CC, I think she has lost your trust. Do you have the book Baby Whisperer solves all your problems... it has a great section on an issue like yours. The parent slept in the room & basically gradually withdrew their presence over a number of weeks... We did something like that with our ds, as he had a lot of seperation anxiety I think due to the fact we did some CC before I discovered BW.
Let me know if you want some more guidance about the sleeping in the room & gradual withdrawral.
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