My midwife told me to stop bf!!!

[deenz]

I have been seeing a different mw for the past few weeks (since my original one went off to have her own baby), and she did not realise that I am still bf my dd.  I am 38wks pregnant.  Admittedly I am only feeding once per day, and it's more a comfort thing than nutrition.  But, today, it happened to come up that I am still feeding her, and she told me I should have stopped by now!  And that I can't feed dd when #2 comes along!!  Now I know this is not true.  She said it is unlikely with only one feed a day, but that the nipple stimulation could cause labour to start...

That is one thing that I was going to ask about - the labour starting with the stimulation, since every time I feed her I do get tightenings.  But I figured that nothing would happen that wasn't ready to happen anyway.

Anyone have any ideas on the labour-starting side of things??

I think I'm just going to continue on and not tell her!  Can you tell I'm not a very confrontational type of person!  The thing is the lc who helped me in the beginning with dd (a family member) is overseas at the moment, so I don't feel like I can say "But so-n-so said it's ok"...  and of course advice from the internet doesn't count as real advice!

It makes me mad that (some) midwives do not know much about bf!

[LindseysMom]

I would say that you have made it this far, why stop now.  Do you plan on nursing both your babies when your new baby arrives?  I guess if you want to then go for it, it can be done.  And I also think you are far enough along in your pregnancy that even if the bf'ing did start some contractions your baby would be ok if the contractions led to an early birth.

[Katet]

my honest thought & I have no experience with it but 38 weeks is considered term, so if it brought on labour, would it really matter?
I know the only person I have met who fed 2 at the same time, had the easiest labour & was told it was because of the bf.
I think you would actually cause more problems with #1 also as she will remember being fed & "why is the baby allowed it but I'm not" Which would be my biggest issue. My ds#1 stopped very early in preg with #2, but has "had a suck" 3 times since #2 has been feeding.
You have to weigh up what works for your family... but if it was me... I'd still feed #1!!!

[carolyn]

i remember reading a post on a board about freezing and using breast milk.  And what surprised me, because no one ever told me this, is that breastmilk changes as the child gets older.  So milk that you are producing at 6 days is differnt from milk you produce at 6 months.  The nutritional value is different.  This is probably what you mid wife is trying to tell you.  She may be thinking that if you continue to breastfeed your older child, your body will not produce the right milk for your younger child.

[GraceKellysmom]

At 38 weeks, I'd be increasing my nursings, not decreasing.  :wink: I really am  :shock:  that midwife doesn't know better than what she told you. I mean, come ON!  :twisted:

Your body will know once you've given birth that it is time for the colostrum to go and milk to come back. And yes, #1 would be incredibly jealous if you stop now and just feed your newborn. You should make plenty of milk for both. Most lcs just advise to always feed your newborn first, make sure they get what they need.

You will be our first tandem nurser on board! Woohooo!! 

[webfoot]

I have no knowlege on this issue but I would also say if you're at 38 weeks you're full term! I was ready to eject baby at that point with #2 and #3 by then anyways. If a little nipple stimulation moves things along and your body is ready no big deal!

As for tandem nursing I know there are multiple boards that address this issue and if you talk to Le Leche league people you'll get lots of support and advice on this. You wont' be the first, or last woman to do this. I saw a really beautiful painted picture of a woman tandem nursing a toddler and infant at the same time once.  Good for you! phooey on MW.

[annamum]

Great advice already. I only heard that some women nurse during the labor to actually speed up things a little. But as everyone else said, at 38 weeks you are not risking anything. And yes, don't stop now, your toddler wouldn't understand why new baby gets to be nursed and she is not.

If you always nurse a baby first, there will be enough milk for both. You can actually tell dd#1 that a baby is bringing her a gift, more milk!

[Erin (redstarfalling)]

Ditto to what was said!  Good for you for keeping it up!! 

[zelkad]

i think you should be very proud.....yay!!!  

[Erin M]

I've read that the nipple stimulation necessary to bring on labor was something like 2 hours a day - doubt your once a day nursing is amounting to that!

[CaedensMama]

Ditto to everything that has been said - my thought exactly! Also, I have heard that your milk will change for the new child and have the nutrients it needs there, your toddler may notice the difference but she will either go with it herself and enjoy it or perhaps start self weaning herself. Either way - you are not doing any harm by continuing and may help labor progress so go for it! Also - I would echo the suggestion that La Leche League will have go advice and support if you are still being told you have to stop and want to give them some information in your favor of continuing. Check their website!

[deenz]

Thank you!!  I was also thinking that even if I did believe her, that it would be too late to stop now... I know for sure dd remembers things from more than a few weeks before.  It would make jealousy issues worse than than better (which was another thing that mw mentioned)!

I have no problem with tandem feeding, but also understand that dd may not be happy with the sudden influx of milk, and that's ok too.  I have tried talking to her about the baby coming, and that baby will also drink my milk; also she's seen lots of pics of newborns nursing, and knows what they're doing.

I too would not be too unhappy if this baby came 'early' due to the nursing!!  (And no, she certainly isn't nursing for 2hrs a day!).

The thing with my MW is that my previous one had said it's quite ok, and just to make sure newborn feeds first etc (which the LC had told me is really only true while the colostrum is still there).  My new MW was the 'partner' of the old one, and they're really good friends, both came over to NZ from UK together etc etc - I just can't understand why they have such different views on this...

Anyway, I'm off to nurse my dd!

Thanks again for your support!

[CarolinaGirl]

I have worked in Labor and Delivery for more than 10 years. As others have said, 38 weeks is considered term. Many inductions and c-sections are performed at 38 weeks and even 37 weeks so if you go into labor due to nipple stimulation, hoorah for you.  :lol:   I had problems with preterm labor so obviously that would be an issue for me. I certainly would not worry about having too many contractions at this point in your pregnancy. Your midwife should have made herself more clear.

Aside from that, all I can think of is how busy you are going to be with two babies - but how wonderful it will all be!!  Good luck to you!

Heather
Mommy to Logan (10 years) and Luke (5 months)

[deenz]

I spoke to a La Leche League leader today, who basically assured me of what I already knew, and what you all have said as well.  So at least now I feel like I have some 'expert' 'real-life' advice to fall back on if it comes up again with my midwife.

Thanks again!