This is my first post here. I've been reading, but just started the sh-sh pat pat thing on Thursday night, three days ago. My son Grayson is just shy of four months and was doing great sleeping until his pacifier turned into an awful sleep crutch and started causing him to wake every 1-3 hours for replacement by mommy and daddy. So hence the sleep training routine. The poor guy, we've taken away his binky, started him on a new schedule, and stopped feeding him in the middle of the night, all together. So tell me if I'm doing this right:
On Thursday, we started giving him a DF at 11-11:30pm to finish off the rest of the ounces he needs for the day. He normally goes to bed between 7-8pm. When he would normally wake at 1-3am, we sh-sh patted him through it without a feeding. That first night, he woke at 2:15am and took about 45 minutes to get back to sleep, soundly, not much crying though, it was great. He woke at 5:45 am, a little too early for us. All day Friday, we did the EASY routine, but because he is still on a 1.5 hour wake time, it gets to an ESA sometime throughout the day.
Friday night was like the demon child came out to play! He woke at 10:30, went back to sleep on his own, surprisingly, woke at 11:00 so we did the DF then, then he woke at 2:15am crying like I've never heard him cry. I couldn't calm him and DH and I were at each other's throats! He gave him the binky and I near about killed him! SO along came Mrs. Bad-Mommy who took it away. I had to actually climb into his crib with him and hold him, sh-sh him and pat him for an hour and a half straight, with no break in his crying until he was basically exhausted. The tears were plenty and he just about beat me up with all of his swinging and thrashing. He conked out pretty suddenly then, moaning a little on the way. Phew, he went to sleep! Then he woke again at 4, 5, 5:30 and 6. I fed him at 6 and since I was so exhausted myself, I took him to bed with us to get a little more sleep. He lasted there until 7:30, which confused our whole EASY routine, so we were way off all day with more of a ESA and no real Y, because his naps were horrendous. He had one great 2 hour morning nap with very little fighting and he stayed down on his own for 1.5 hours and a little help to get back to sleep then. He didn't nap again until 6:15pm!! I can't believe it, he's never fought sleeping like that, it was awful, awful! He finally went down and stayed there until about 7pm. We had him up with us, sitting calmly and playing in my lap until 7:45 when I gave him his final feeding, went through his night routine and put him to bed. We did the dream feed at 11:30pm and he woke pretty much every one to two hours. The good news is that he was much easier to settle with a few pats and sh-sh's, so even though he was up a lot, it seems like he is getting better. Then, he woke at 6am and played for 20 minutes, cooing in his crib by himself. I fed him at 6:30 and we started the EASY schedule. (right now is my Y as a matter of fact, he he) He cried pretty hard in the process of getting him down for his first nap today, but it only lasted 4 minutes. I had to hold his arms and legs down until he conked out again, I sh-shed him just while he was crying, then when he calmed, I got softer and softer and only patted him for another 3 minutes. I stood there watching him for the rest of the 10 minutes, to make sure he didn't stir again. He's still out, thank goodness and that was about 30 minutes ago. He will probably wake at the 45 minute mark for a quick sh-sh and pat and then stay down for 1.5 to 2 hours.
So tell me girls, does this seem to be right, and progressing the way it should? I know it's only been a few days, but I REALLY hate when my baby cries, it makes me cry. We are NOT fans of CIO and have practiced limited attachment parenting, so this is hard for us. I worry though that even though we are taking the pacifier away, are we creating a new sleep crutch by patting and sh-shing him to sleep? I know it's early, but I'm looking for signs that I can cut back on that and hopefully get back to just putting my hand on his back for a few seconds while he dozes off (like he did with the binky). Also, there are times when he cries so hard, he chokes and when I do the p/u-p/d he gets worse. He usually gets like this when I wait to see if he will self-soothe. I only wait a few seconds and listen to the type of cry....I know we should do this so he doesn't get used to us always being there, but is it too early for this? I can't handle when he cries like that.
Oh, and I forgot to say that I swapped his binky for a "lovey" which is a small blanket with satin on one side and velour on the other. He seems to like it, but doesn't quite "need" it yet. I hope it eventually helps. He seems to really need us at night though and I assume this is normal, considering how early it is and how much change we have put him through over the past few days. DH is going away overnight next week and I am really hoping we have this somewhat licked by then or I will go crazy by myself. I rely on him sooooo much at night. I'm not nearly as patient as him, but I won't give in, that's for sure. I just might lose my mind in the meantime!
I have read plenty of similar threads on here, but you know how it is, it helps to know that you are personally doing the right things....If there is any additional advice or encouragement you can offer, I'd be very grateful!!
Jessica with Grayson - 16 weeks today!
