Author Topic: Need a shoulder to cry on!  (Read 1650 times)

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Offline jswerczek

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Need a shoulder to cry on!
« on: September 23, 2005, 15:56:23 pm »
Well, I don't know what has happened but my DS has defiantly regressed in the sleeping area. I shouldn't complain because we had a month of wonderful, almost everyday was just like the schedule out of Tracy's latest book. He transitioned to the 4-hr EASY no problem. He went down beautifully for naps and for the most part put himself back to sleep after the 45 m. mark, a few times I had to help. Also, he was sleeping 8:30-6:45 a.m. with a df at 11 p.m. Now all hell has broke loose!

This week started off well, he was just like I described. Then I went back to work on Tuesday and he spent one day away from home. Every since then sleep has been a nightmare. He screams going down for all naps. I was just swaddling him and laying him down after wind down routine and he would lay happily and fall asleep. Now I cannot lay him down or he will scream! When he finally calms down, he sleeps for the 45 m. but instead of going back to sleep smoothly, I am in and out of his room for the rest of the nap, trying to get him to sleep.

As for the night sleep, he slept until 6:45 a.m. the three days prior to daycare, but then on that day I had to get him out of bed at 6 a.m. The last three mornings he has woke up between 5 and 6 a.m. and I spend a lot of time trying to get him back to sleep (just until 7 a.m.) I can't believe one day at daycare screwed up everything, didn't Tracy's book say that it took about 3 days to start a bad habit?

Sorry, I have went on and on, I am just feeling sad and emotional today, I started to cry when I was pat/sshh.. him for the fifth time! He is such a great baby but I feel like we are going backwards. I am not quite sure what to do with this daycare thing. I am only taking him there 6 days out of a month, but I feel like it screws everything up. I try so hard to get him back to sleep on the days he wakes early, but what am I really teaching him if the next day I get him up early? I am thinking it might be good to start the day at 6 a.m. instead of 7 am to accomodate the daycare, but honestly, that is only six days that he needs to be up that early. Anyway, I have went on long enough, just want to know if anyone has any suggestions. Maybe something else is going on with him and the daycare isn't the issue. I just hope that all the good sleep behaviors will return one of these days!

Thanks so much for listening.
Jennifer

Mom to Jake born 6-16-05 and Julia born 8-29-07

Offline Chantel03

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Need a shoulder to cry on!
« Reply #1 on: September 24, 2005, 04:28:09 am »
Sounds like you need a hug!

Hang in there.
Tanner- My active, fun loving 4yr old.
Kaitlyn- My new baby girl.

Offline Deb_in_oz

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« Reply #2 on: September 24, 2005, 04:51:41 am »
i did not see any mention of how old he is, but regardless I woudl say it is probably the daycare change that has caused this.  is it 6 days close together or far apart??  he obviously needs time to adjust to that new routine, being apart from you, etc  Depending on the age i would really try hard to reassure him about the separation.  maybe compromise a bit and if he has to be up at 6 for daycare, you start getting him up at 6:20- 6:30 on the other days so you can get a regular routine established again that is within 1/2 hr of that desired timeline...if he wakes at 5 still persist with resettling until 6-6:30.  good luck
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Offline jswerczek

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Need a shoulder to cry on!
« Reply #3 on: September 24, 2005, 13:34:28 pm »
Thank you ladies for your response, I was feeling a bit sad yesterday! My DS is 14 weeks old. You know, there just doesn't seem to be no rhyme or reason to how he sleeps at night. Like I said, he has been waking real early but then last night he sleep like a dream until 7 a.m. I did nothing different yesterday and he went down horrible for naps. But he surprised me!

He's at daycare either once or twice a week so the days he needs to get up earlier or pretty spread out. We'll see what happens next week when I do it again. I just feel that his sleeping habits are going in the wrong direction. And of course it makes me want to quit my job and stay home even though I only work part time  :D

Question- I have been swaddling forever, I don't think he can sleep well without it, but he has been screaming bloody murder now when I do it and lay him down for a nap. Should I begin to wean him off of it?

Thanks for the hug!
Jennifer

Mom to Jake born 6-16-05 and Julia born 8-29-07

Offline JKHH

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Need a shoulder to cry on!
« Reply #4 on: September 24, 2005, 14:55:42 pm »
Jennifer,

Hugs to you!

You might feel better if you check out the thread under the EASY forum for babies born in April/May. Lots of moms are experiencing what you are going through. I did too. It seems babies at around 4 months start to have their routines go out the window for a few weeks because there is so much going on for them developmentally. My daughter Kay started getting out of wack at 14 weeks too. She did it all waking up early, waking up 2 hrs after bedtime, waking up because of pooping, fighting the swaddle again, and on and on.

Keep with the swaddle for now and know that there is an end in sight. You may notice your DS is doing lots of stuff now...using his hands in a more coordinated fashion, smiling more etc. It seems the down side to all this new activity is having sleep routines take a vacation. So don't quit your job yet!

Hang in there.
Janet

Mom to (Kay) Kathleen Elizabeth
Born May 4, 2005 - a Textbook/Spirited Baby

(Abby) Abigail Christina
Born November 4, 2007 - a Textbook Baby

Offline GG

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Need a shoulder to cry on!
« Reply #5 on: September 24, 2005, 18:41:45 pm »
Yes, it does take 3 days for bad habits to form, but this wasn't due necessarily to a bad habit.  It was due to a change in his routine.  It confused him and, even though the other days are the same, the wrench keeps getting thrown in the works every few days when you take him to daycare.  But this is something that he will get used to, so don't worry.

I think you should definitely change the awake time to 6 AM every day, to accomodate that other day (it stinks, but what can you do?).  Also, find out what the daycare's routine is.  Ask if there's any way they can try sticking to your routine - or even close to it.

Finally, when he's home, do not change what you have been doing.  That will confuse him further.  Even if he's fussing, try putting him down at the same time, pat/shush when necessary, etc.

HTH
Georgia, mom to 3 sweet babes: touchy Foti, spirited Lena & not-so-tiny Joanna




Offline GG

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« Reply #6 on: September 24, 2005, 20:50:02 pm »
Also, Janet was right that things start to go out of wack at 3 months on.  If you think that he may be ready to be unswaddled, try leaving 1 arm out for a day or two.  If he's not waking himself up, continue this for about week or two, then swaddle only his torso and leave his arms out for another week or two.  Just look for his cues.

Let us know how things go!  Good luck!
Georgia, mom to 3 sweet babes: touchy Foti, spirited Lena & not-so-tiny Joanna




Offline jswerczek

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« Reply #7 on: September 26, 2005, 13:24:35 pm »
Thank you ladies for your advice. Things have been a little better in the sleeping department but I go to work tomorrow so we'll be getting him up early again. We'll see how the rest of the week goes. I may have to switch to a 6 a.m. start. I do get all ready first and get him out of bed at the last minute. My new babysitter is across the street so I played with the idea of keeping him in his swaddle and carrying him over and maybe he would stay asleep. But I'm not sure I want him to wake up in a strange place and it probably wouldn't work either.

As for the swaddle, I am not sure he is ready to be out of it even though he fights it so much. I would like to try one arm out, but he is constantly chewing on his fists, doesnt' seem to try and suck his fingers anymore, and he would never sleep with his hands out. Lately he's been Hudini getting out of his miracle blanket in the wee hours of the morning! I couldn't believe it. And of course he's chewing on those fists and if I don't wrap him back up he won't fall back asleep.

It's crazy how everything can get off track with the slightest change. I am sure we will face many more obstacles like rolling, teething, sitting up... :D  Can't wait!
Jennifer

Mom to Jake born 6-16-05 and Julia born 8-29-07

Offline GG

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« Reply #8 on: September 29, 2005, 04:54:56 am »
Quote from: jswerczek
I do get all ready first and get him out of bed at the last minute. My new babysitter is across the street so I played with the idea of keeping him in his swaddle and carrying him over and maybe he would stay asleep. But I'm not sure I want him to wake up in a strange place and it probably wouldn't work either.

I wouldn't recommend that.  Just wake him up.
Beside, seeing him (awake) would be a good way to start the day. :-D
Georgia, mom to 3 sweet babes: touchy Foti, spirited Lena & not-so-tiny Joanna