mixed up about wake-to-sleep

[jenben]

Ben is sleeping pretty well at night.  Naps are another story.  Usually, his first nap is pretty good.  In his later naps, he often wakes at around 45 minutes.

Ben is 4 1/2 months, and we have almost transitioned to a 4 hour feeding schedule.

I've read some of the posts about the 45 minute problem and wake-to-sleep, and some sections out of the "BW Solves All Your Problems".

I'm a little confused about wake-to-sleep.  In the book, it talks about beginning to pat at 30 minutes and continuing until he falls back into a deep sleep,  sometimes, taking 20 to 25 minutes of patting.  On the forum, I've read to make him stir at 30 minutes, and immediately leave.  A third thing I've seen suggested is just to be there at 30 minutes and help him through when he stirs.  The only one I haven't tried is to stir and leave.

They all seem totally different things to me!  Am I mixed up, or are they all good strategies, and how do I know which to use?  How do I know if its working and I just need to keep trying it?  Many times when the wake-to-sleep method I've chosen falls through, he wakes fully and I can't get him back to sleep, sometimes for an hour or the entire rest of the nap.

Maybe this has already been covered well and I missed it.  If so, let me know where to look!

[Matthew's Mommy]

With "wake to sleep", less is more. 

Many parents have used the approach in different ways, so it really depends on your little one.  Some babies sleep deepily and can soothe back to sleep, to just a little head rub and leave the room will work.

For some, they need someone to stay with them for the transition from deep sleep to partial awakening and back into light sleep and into deep sleep.  In the beginning, it will take a long time-- especially if they are used to fully awakening.  Some babies respond to patting, some respond to just hands on their legs and arms/ as well as eyes shielded from visual stimulation.

Every child is different, there are many strategies to use.

You mentioned that one nap is lengthening.. is that the first one?  What usually happens at the 45 min mark-- does he wake up happy and alert or is it a cry out.

[Little Bear's Mum]

Hi, I just wanted to let you know I've just tried wake 2 sleep for the first time today on 2 naps, and I think it worked! So I thought I'd let you know what I did incase it helps you.

Basically I went in at 30 mins (frequently wakes at 40mins) and made sure my son was deeply sleeping. I tried to gently move him by putting my hand on his chest but there was no response from him. So I quietly said his name a couple of times. When he took a deep breath and fluttered his eyes open then closed I then quietly snuck out of the room.

The first nap became 1 1/2 hours and the other nap which was late in the afternoon and is normally only 30 mins stretched out to 50 mins. I'm hoping it wasn't just coincidence so I'll try again tomorrow.

Anyway, hope it goes well for you.