I NEED HELPPPPPPPP!!!!!!!!

[DN]

OK so - I posted on the Naps board about my 3 month old son having naps in his swing.  I wanted to get him out of it because 1 he was getting too big for it and 2 I knew I had started a bad habit.  He would sleep well at night - getting up around three for a feed and then sleeping to 6 or 7.  We gave him a "nummy" to go to bed with - but he would lose it after about 10 minutes and would not wake up for it.

It was recommended that I spend his naps in his room - which I have done since Monday.  I have done the pu/pd and also patting him in his crib.  When he wakes up I think he is looking for his Nummy.  So now last night he woke up at 1 (fed him and he ate 3 ounces),3 and 5:30 looking for his nums.

So know I not only have the issue of bad naps but also getting up for his nummy at night.

This morning when he went back to bed at 7:00 (he was clearly tired).  I didn't give him is nummy - he screamed bloody murder.  I comforted him in his crib while he cried and finally when he got so upset I did a pu/pd until he calmed down (shhh and patting his back).  When he did I put him down and continued to pat his back.  Know I'm afraid he's going to need me to pat his back everytime he wakes up.  He's still sleeping (after 50 minutes) and I have gone in once to pat his back a few times when he looked for his nummy.

I need help - I feel like I'm losing my mind.  I want to know if what I am doing is helping him or just giving him more bad habits.  Should I lose the Nummy altogether and do the pu/pd?  Oh yeah - I'm not sure if he will find a way to soothe himself - right know if he does put his fingers/fists in his mouth he gets sooooooooo frustrated - trying to put his whole hand in his mouth - he gets mad and wakes up.

Thanks so much for your help:)

DN

[Jayri]

okay I will see if I can help, as it sounds like you have a few different things to figure out.

Are you doing pat/shh or pu/pd, if your lo is 3mths old then try only pat/shh. What I did with dd is I would pat/shh her until her eyes were starting to roll, and she was pretty out of it, that way she didn't have too much work to do by herself, but it wasn't done completely for her, IYKWIM.

Try to leave the room if he is sleeping, it may help him to self soothe a little easier if you leave him to it.

Are you able to figure out if he is actually crying or mantra crying? it may help you to figure out if he is simply settling himself or if he needs you.

Do you have a copy of BW solves all your problems, if you don't have it I highly recommend getting it, it has become my life line in trying to figure out what to do.

On the nummy thing, I take it is a soother, I have done both, my ds had one till 18mths, and dd has only used her fingers. It is a personal choice if he is able to settle without it then great, but if he needs it then it may get tricky once he looses it in his sleep. KWIM.

For now that is all I can think of, stick with it hunny, keep me/us posted if you need any other ideas and let us know how things are going.]

Good luck.