Author Topic: Lots of wakings but won't settle for DH  (Read 1076 times)

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Offline deb

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Lots of wakings but won't settle for DH
« on: October 05, 2005, 11:19:22 am »
Natalie is now 4.5 months and has yet to sleep through, which means that so do I. Her wakings WERE completely habitual, i.e. same time, but just when I was ready to do wake-to-sleep they went all over the place. One would THINK that means hunger, and sometimes it is - she'll nurse and nurse and nurse - and sometimes it's a snack/comfort thing.

On the rare occasions when DH does hear her :roll: , he's not able to settle her: she'll get more and more restless, start with the "Eh, eh, eh," and progress to crying and then screaming. He's been able to put her to bed at night ONCE since she was born, and that night she still wanted more than was in the bottle so I had to go back in and finish off w/nursing anyway. :?

She just had jabs yesterday, so I figure last night doesn't really count, but if she's feeling better today we might try some solids (banana) and see if we cn get more calories into her. She nurses PLENTY during the day - I figure with all the crawling around she's burning calories right and left, although she distracts easily no matter where I nurse her so she might not be taking really full feeds - and honestly, if I nurse her much more often I think I'm going to burst from all the milk I've got. :?

Josie settled so much better for DH, but Natalie really does seem to be a Mama's girl - nice to be needed, but not so nice at 1AM, and at 3AM, and at 430AM.....KWIM? And don't even get me started on when she wants to wake for the day; this morning I was actually able to get her back down when she woke early (both times :roll:) and she's still up there, albeit restless. There's only so much I can do with PU/PD as my back/shoulders are an issue and she's 16 pounds :shock: , and there's this other kid who lives here who needs the odd bit of attention too. LOL

Suggestions PLEASE?!?!?!?!

Offline Jaime

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Lots of wakings but won't settle for DH
« Reply #1 on: October 05, 2005, 22:03:12 pm »
my only thoughts....

once you've kicked the hunger habit, trade nights.  seems to me i remember lana (ewan's mom) posting somewhere that it can negate all the sleep training if mom & dad trade off mid-way.

so, if you exhaust her one night, dh gets the next night.  and so on.
Jaime
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Offline deb

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Lots of wakings but won't settle for DH
« Reply #2 on: October 06, 2005, 01:34:22 am »
Problem is, when DH goes in, and bless his heart it's not for lack of trying (he's tried naptimes and bedtimes, not just slept thru night wakings ;)), I HAVE to go in there eventually. She WILL NOT settle for him, and when she cries even a little, Josie goes ballistic. When Natalie cries full-bore, Josie simply can't be in the house, and frankly, I can't bear to hear it either.

This evening, I gave her the bath & bottle since DH was cooking supper (he IS the grillmaster :)), put her to bed, and as I was leaving one of my joints cracked and she woke up. :roll: I sat down to eat some supper hoping she'd settle herself, but no dice. DH went back there and as soon as she realized it was HIM and not ME, MAN, was she p!$$ed!!!!! She wasn't just crying, she was YELLING!!! I thought she might still be hungry, so I warmed up the spare bottle in the fridge and she took that for all of 10 seconds before reverting to yelling her lungs out. Finally, so my food wouldn't turn into a congealed lump in my stomach and so Josie would stop crying and kicking the wall (seriously, I'm not making that up :?), I went in, checked to see if she'd take the breast (she didn't), so I settled her the usual way - with great difficulty since she was WAY worked up - and down she went w/o any more milk. Took 10 minutes tops. She just wanted MOMMY. :?

I guess we're going to have to do a gradual transition and just get her to accept DH one way or another, but Josie can't handle the crying (she's even more sensitive to that sound than I am, and that's pretty sensitive! :shock:) and frankly neither can I. It takes her AGES to settle once she's really riled, and it IS much simpler to haul my kiester upstairs from the basement in the middle of a clarinet lesson (I teach at home 2 nights/week) or out of bed at 2AM and put her down in 5 minutes than to listen to that for 5 or 10 or 15 minutes AND hear Josie freaking out too. DH DOES try, he watches to see how I'm doing it, and he had lots of success with Josie as a baby, but this one seems to be joined to me at the hip still, like the cord never quite got cut. *sigh*

Offline Jaime

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Lots of wakings but won't settle for DH
« Reply #3 on: October 06, 2005, 19:00:08 pm »
you just may be stuck with it then until natalie gets a little bit older.   :?

does josie ever sleep through the crying at night, or are they too close together?  is your room far enough away that you wouldn't hear her at night if the monitor was off?  maybe then dh could try?

just seems like she wants you to rescue her from everyone else.  though if that is what works best for your family - and considering your & josie's reaction to the crying, it just might be!

sorry i don't have any more ideas.
Jaime
~~~
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