Help!10 Weeks old and has NEVER Napped more then 40 minutes!

[NICOLA H]

Hi There!

I'm new to this site so apologies if this problem is addressed elsewhere on this site but I am having a nightmare with my DS (first child).

I am very familiar with the BW book, having watched the TV series and read Tracey's book. I really do like her attitude and approach to raising children, however I am really struggling getting my ten week old son passed the 40 minute transition to deep sleep. In fact, at 10
 weeks old he has NEVER had a nap for longer 40 minutes.

The strange thing is, that I can put him down for bed after a bath at 7.30pm, awake, and he will fall asleep happily until 4am for a feed, won't sleep during the day. He will fall asleep initially on his own after his activity, but will not pass 40 minutes. Once he wakes, he is so cranky that I cannot put him down anywhere in the house without him crying, until his next feed (3.5 hours), when the cycle starts again.

As you can imagine this is really geting to me and I am getting very stressed at having a baby that cries literally all day long and I am wishing away the day untill his proper bedtime, which I know is wrong  :cry: .

I have tried the Wake to Sleep method and have stopped his actual startled jerks, but instead of him going back to sleep (with my hand still on his chest), he just opens his eyes and smiles for a minute or two and then cries, so I have to take him out of the room, and the cycle starts again.

Please can anyone help? and Why can he get passed the 40 minutes mark at night but not during the day? He wakes during the night before feed time but happily babbles himself to back to sleep, so why the problems during the day?

Thanks for any advice (please) xxx 

[Kim -Bailey's Mom]

Nicola....
Your son sounds just like mine.  I'm not sure how to post a message (I've done it before, but cannot seem to get it to work now), so I thought I would write to you.   I've been struggling with 45 minute naps.  My son sleeps great through the night also, but wakes at 5 or 6 and then is awake for the day.  I've been really trying to extend naps for about a month (I'm on day 23 because I've been writing it all down to try to see a pattern).  It has been tough.  Bailey can now extend a nap on his own, but only about once every few days.  Sometimes it only takes 1 minute of patting and then he extends and other times he never goes back to sleep. We used to pat/shss for 30-40 minutes and the first few days was a lot of screaming (me and him), but now we can tell after 10 minutes whether he will go or not.  Sometimes we just stop and hope the next nap will work.  Since about day nine things seemed better, but we have lots of setback still.  Generally thought, things are better than before.   
Here are a few ideas that seem to help us.  His room is blacked out.  I have wave music playing in the background. He is swaddled from the waist down.  When he wakes up I try my best to leave him because the few times that he has extended, he waked up and lightly cries and moans (about 5 - 15 minutes) and then he goes back to sleep.  One time I left him for 45 minutes because he never got worked up....he just was talking to himself....and then he went back to sleep. 
We are at the point where he usually extends one nap a day (usually with a 5 minute pat/shss), and then he is no longer grumpy in the afternoon.
I hope this helps. 
I have asked myself the same question about why they can get past 45 minutes at night, but not in the day.  I'm not sure, but I thank my lucky stars.
If you find anything that works, please write me back.
Good luck.
Kim

[Matthew's Mommy]

Day sleep takes time to organize, and is a different type of sleep from night sleep, and what he is doing is absolutely normal for a newborn/young infant.

What you may end up doing is a modified EASY cycle.. more like an Eat Activity Sleep Activity Eat.. this is fine. You may notice that witin 10-20 mins. of being awake, he's ready for another nap.. that's okay! Swaddle him up, and wind him down for sleep.

Learning how to fall asleep and stay asleep is a process. Takes time, and developmental maturity.

[Kim -Bailey's Mom]

Jane,
Thanks for helping Nicola and I.  EASAE is what I end up doing most of the time.  About once every 3 days he extends a nap (either himself or with me pat/shssing for 5 minutes). 
I can tell that Bailey is tired when he wakes up, but he will not go back to sleep.  Sometimes I've tried at the 0.5 hour, but he gets really upset, even though I know he is really tired.  I've been through lots of screaming because it took 2 weeks of pat/shss to help him fall asleep on his own...but he did it.  Then we rested for a few weeks and then attempted to extend naps.  For 9 days I did pat/shss (by the book - to pat him to his next bottle time).  Since then we have been less by the book.  We pat for about 5 minutes and then read his body language to decide if he might go back to sleep.  If he is screaming, then he has never gone back to sleep.  We are now on day 24  (of trying to extend) and he only extends a nap every couple days.   
I'm not sure what I'm doing wrong?  And how do I get him to go back after 1/2 hour and is grumpy,  but usually has 1.75 hours awake time. 
Jane....someone else was writing to you and they mentionned something about 45 minute naps and the 6 month maturity.  Is there something magical that might happen at 6 months?
Any advice would be great.
Nicola...have you had any success?  I hope your little one has extended some lately.  How many days have you been working on it?