sleep training? I give up!

[Baby Ethan]

My LO has been a 45 min napper since he was 2 months, he's almost 6 months now. For the last month i have given up any form of a social life to do everything and anything to get him to extend his naps but with no luck. I've done wake to sleep, i've tried pat/sh, i've tried blocking out any visual stimulation with my hand just above his eyes (this worked about three times but took the best part of about 40 mins) and for the last 3, 4 days i've just been leaving him after he's woken and hes spent the remainder of his nap time lying in his cot talking and playing. He doesn't wake up crying, if i go to him he's sooo excited to see me. I've tried experimenting with his awake times and it makes no difference how long i make it, he still wakes up after exactly 45 minutes still rearing to go.

Surely, if after a month, i can't change his napping then thats just the way that he is?? If it it is does any one have any examples of a routine that accomodates for a 45 minute napper? ie how many 45 minute naps a day should a 6 month have and how long should their wake time be?

At the moment this is the routine we have

7 am bottle
8:30 am breakfast
9 am nap
9:45 wake (leave him in his cot or try something else)
11 am bottle
13:00 nap
13:45 wake (try again)
15:00 bottle
16:30 - 17:00 cat nap for 30 mins
17:30 dinner
18:00 bath
18:30 bottle
19:00 bed

There is alot of wake time between naps but he doesn't cry just fusses a bit.

Any advice would be welcome

[Deb_in_oz]

well i say you have done a great job and what a commitment you made to try to extend his naps - you must be exhausted!  do you have the latest book?  if so, read page 201 about babies who have always taken short naps.  the whole paragraph is good to read but in case you don't have it the bottom line is Tracy says that if short naps are not a sudden change but rather the way baby has always napped AND "he's not cranky, and he's sleeping well at night, then there's nothing to fix"

so my only questions to you are 1) how are his nights and 2) what tired signs does he give and 3) when you do put him down for his naps how long does it take him to settle to sleep (just checking to see if he is calm and ok to go to sleep or overtired/overstimulated with lots of crying...)

assuming that he is not having nightwakings i think it sounds like this is his biorhythm and all you can do is keep watching his cues and offer the naps and hope that he is one of those kids that will just extend them when he needs to.  someone else might say different but this is my 2 cents worth.

I finally accepted that Olivia only does a 45 min morning nap (has done for months) and a 45 min or 1hr 30 afternoon nap (used to do a catnap as well of up to 1hr 30) then she started changing it on me whenever she wanted - no changes on my part.  some days like today she does 2 x 1hr 30 and once recently she took a 2hr 45 min afternoon nap - which has not happened since she was born (and has not been repeated but i was so stunned that she was capable of it after struggling for so long to lengthen her 45 min naps) so i just accept her and trust that i always have that catnap up my sleeve if she is having 2 short naps i offer a 3rd one before dinner.

not sure about specific timings.  if he is not terribly upset with what you have i think it looks ok.

[Baby Ethan]

Hi there, thanks for your quick response.
It's good to hear of others in the same boat and that thats the way some babies just are and not just mine  :wink: .

Our nights are good, really good  . the last two nights he's slept from 7 - 7 with no dream feed. (he stoped taking anything so i just stopped giving them) so no complaints there.

During the day, when he starts to get a little loud and starts fussing, i take that as the que for his nap. At that point i put him in his cot, zip us his sleeping bag, put the dummy in his mouth (some times he'll keep it in other times he'll just spit it out) give him his blankie and then leave the room. He'll normally just rub the blankie around his face and hum himself to sleep. Lately it's only taken him about 5-10 mins to fall asleep. Theres never any crying. He might carry on fussing a bit but thats about it.

The only real time i find 45 min nap becomes a problem is with feeding him solids, i generally feed him 1 and a half hours after his bottle and if he's hes been awake for a while, then this becomes a bit of a fight whereas if i gave him the same stuff after his nap, he loves it.

[Deb_in_oz]

wow - it sounds great. i would not stress about it.  if he eats his solids better after his nap then i would do it when it works for you.

if he is fussy due to long awake times you can do 1 of 2 things
1.  when he wakes form his nap at 45 min leave him in the cot as long as he is happy talk ting to himself - at least he is away from stimulation and i have always been reasured that all "down time" is beneficial - so if he has 45 min sleep and another 20-30 min "rest" time in dark room he might be better in his next awake time
or 2. make sure at least 20-30 min of his A time is extremely low key (no noisy toys, maybe a walk in the pram, hanging out with you etc)

enjoy getting out more!!!