Bedtime vs Nap time

[Judy]

Ok - one would think with two older children and 6months down with these little ladies, that I would have figured out how to get them to bed by now.  NOPE!!

It's frustring the he!! out of me.  Naps are ok.  Actually Kaia is generally very easy to go to sleep - she sticks her index finger in her mouth and soothes herself to dreamland 98% of the time - nap, bedtime whatever.  Hannah needs a solid 5min of patting 99% of the time for naps. 

Bedtime and Hannah do not mix.  I don't know why.  I cannot figure it out.  AND *IF* Kaia gets woken up after a 20-30 min sleep at bedtime then she's full out unwilling to go back to sleep for hours as well.

Tonight is a great example.  I started the last feed at 6.15 or 6.30 (can't remember) and now at 8.50pm I have just finished feeding them for the second time since then.  They have *finally* fallen asleep on the boob and I'm praying the will not wake when I put them into bed.  They often fall asleep at that earlier feed but Hannah always wakes up when her head hits the mattress and no amount of patting helps.  Either her noisey complaints or the older girls wake Kaia quite often at this time of day.

I've tried a 6pm bedtime, a 7pm bedtime, 8pm, 9pm - you get the picture.  I've tried feeding to sleep, feeding an hour before sleep (which DOES make the 2+hour bedtime more like 20-30min so that is something - but it requires a 20min battle for a catnap at 4-5pm)

I don't see why it is so much different than naptime... any thoughts?

Don't even ask how they do through the night  :roll:  :roll:  :roll:

Now - everyone say a prayer I can transfer them now and then sit down to watch my Martha Apprentice 

[branwen]

Hi Judy

Just outright from reading your message I think maybe consistency might help you. I know you're trying to figure out what works for them and follow the baby etc but sometimes mom taking the lead on it can really help.  I would suggest trying the EXACT same routine for a week and see if you get better results.  Sometimes mom doing what works for her will help just because you're more confident and relaxed...and that could also be the issue with nap v. bed.  Naps sound pretty routine but bedtime an experiment.  Maybe I'm ready your message wrong- do let me know.  :wink:   But I'd give the whole "parent directed" approach a go and approach them with confidence (even if pretend) at bedtime.  If dad can help with the two older ones while you establish your system with them that would be good too.  Then it's just you and them for a week or two establishing your routine.  Gosh I hope this helps....

[GG]

I agree with Branwen.  In trying to figure out what works, the inconsistency could be one of the problems.

I suggest taking care of the smallest ones and getting them to sleep while the 2 older ones get ready for bed.  Ask that they try to be quiet while doing so (maybe make it a game or something?).  Once the babies are sleeping, focus on the 2 older ones.  Read to them if possible, or have them read to you while they are in bed.

I won't pretend that I know what it's like to have 4 children, though I'm working on #2 so I may have somewhat of an idea soon enough!  However, try to come up with a game plan on how bedtime will work, make sure to let the older girls know, then stick with it.  No ifs, ands or buts!  (Good luck!!!    :shock:)

[Judy]

Good point - I will pick a time that works for me and try to stick with it for a week or more.

The older girls are a bit of a problem in that one of them specifically understands that quiet voices are desired and does everything she can to be anything BUT quiet.  It's quite frustrating - but some creative thinking and perhaps we can find a solution that works for everyone.

When dh is home he is always working with the older girls.  Strangely it's a double edged sword - if he's here it's more hands to help out which is great BUT they older two are so much more hyper!  And it isn't that he's doing anything to get them hyper - he may just be sitting on the couch offering to read books - it just seems that his presence in the house makes them want to run around and scream with glee??