Toddler nursing 1 - 2 hourly at night....

[Baby Nanny]

Right, I know (and am trying to help) a mum who has a 17 month old dd who is still nursing throughout the night.  Dd co-sleeps with her parents and wakes every 2 hours to latch on and nurse (about 5 - 10 minutes) then goes back to sleep.  If mom refuses, dd screams, cries etc, falls asleep eventually only to wake 15 minutes later wanting to latch again and it continues.  Mom wants to cut out the coninuous night feeds.  She is happy to nurse at bedtime (7ish) and then again at 10pm and then in the morning again. 
Is there any advise that I can give her?  I have suggested and they have tried several options, but dd is inconsolable and it ends in everyone being in tears and tired (also very clingy to mommy in such that mom and dad don't leave her with a babysitter at all (even close friends and family)   We are working on that though.  Mom is a SAHM.  We just need to get dd sleeping through the night feeds - even if it means rocking her to sleep - keeping the mommy closeness (because then we can work on her falling alsleep on her own)  Once she is sleeping through, then will work on the need to be nursed to sleep during the day and extending her naps from 1 20 minute nap a day to hopefully an hour nap

dd does not take a bottle or dummy.  Trying to introduce a lovey at nights instead of feed, but not too successful

Make sense?

Any ideas welcome

TIA
Sarah

[annamum]

I don't have experience with this but if I were to do night weaning I would definitely use husband to help and move to another room while he works on toddler sleep. Close proximity to mother is irresistible for a nursing cosleeping toddler. That's why she should be out of the sight, and father should find his way of soothing a child.

This is from Kellymom.com.

Gentle methods of night weaning for toddlers
Limit Access.
After you nurse, place the baby back in her area, or slide her away from you so that close proximity doesn't encourage more frequent nursing. Wear clothing that makes it harder for baby to access your breast at night.
Get Dad in on the nighttime routine!
If your baby appears to be waking only for comfort during the night, she may accept Dad as the comforter (and won't expect Dad to nurse her). Dad can comfort baby in other ways, such as offering a drink, just lying next to her, holding her, etc. Dad may even be able to sleep with baby in another room or on the couch with less interruption than if baby were sleeping near mom. The links below to articles by Bill & Martha Sears have many great suggestions along these lines.
Increase daytime contact.
Allow baby unlimited nursing and cuddling during the day. Sometimes toddlers will seek out the breast more at night when they aren't getting enough close cuddling during the day. Sometimes we as busy mothers, especially if we have other children, forget to pick these little ones up often during the day and just sit and cuddle with them. If you can increase this close contact during the day, she may need it less at night. If you work, night nursing may be her way of trying to reconnect with you.
Talk to your child.
With an older child, you may be able to explain something like this, "When the sun goes down, or when we go night-night, num nums (or whatever she calls them) go night-night, too. She probably won't accept or understand this completely at first, but if you say it before bed each night and repeat it each time she awakens, in time she'll "get it".
Just say "no"... or "later."
With an older child (over 18 months), feel secure enough to say "no" (at least some of the time) while staying sensitive to your child's needs. At night, you might say, "not now, but we will later." She may - or may not - awaken again to nurse later.
Substitute other comfort measures.
You also may try other things to settle her, such as a back rub, just holding and cuddling, getting her a drink of water, humming softly, etc.

[Erin (redstarfalling)]

Have you read Elizabeth Pantley's No Cry Sleep Solution?  There are a few posts here on it too - in the Nightwakings forum there's info on the Gentle removal plan to try and slowly wean off nursing at night.  It DOES work and it is gentle, but it takes a long time.  I agree that if she wants to keep the closeness and still co-sleep, she needs to move the breast as far away as possible so baby has to work at nursing overnight.  Also introducing a lovey can help bridge that distance. I have the book (somewhere...) - let me know if you want more suggestions or info on this.

The other option I see is that they might just want to tackle all sleeps at once to be really consistent.  Move her to a toddler bed and explain how it's a big girl's bed etc., and when she wakes to nurse in the night, offer hugs and comfort, but no breast, and preferably not mom.  For going down at naps and night, do a new routine and have dad rock her or something.  If they want to more gradually wean the nursing at night/naps, mom can use a timer with chime - a 17 month old should be able to understand that when the chime sounds, it's time to stop nursing.  Then rock and put down (using pu/pd if crying) for sleep.

[Baby Nanny]

Tx ladies
I will suggest all to her.  Yes, have the No-Cry book and have lent it to her with relative passages marked.  I would love to move in and help, but that isn't possible at the moment     

Your support is appreciated

Tx
Sarah