Help me understand my baby

[cwolff]

I've never quite figured out what "type" of baby dd is.  I'm hoping someone can give me an idea so maybe I'll start to understand her better.  Here's some of her characteristics:  She likes to play but gets frustrated when she can't reach her toys; she seems to get overstimulated easily including with books, winddown has to be something like walking because anything else winds her up, doesn't and hasn't ever cried much she just whines and fusses, loves the paci and is very addicted, was addicted to her swaddle and still having trouble settling down, always wakes in the night never even close to sleeping thru, eating is sporatic usually affected by how tired she is, laughs only rarely, smiles a lot at beginning of awake time, cries sometimes when people other than DH or me look at her (also sometimes because of being tired), very active physically and likes to kick and fight me sometimes for bedtime/naptime, VERY sensitive to noises and can startle herself sometimes.  Hard to keep to easy because of erratic sleep.

Maybe if I get an understanding of what "type" she is, I can learn more about it and hopeful help myself to help her.

[Nikki~Nathan&Danielle]

My first thoughts would be "touchy", but probably quite "textbook" as well.

[jayne]

i am thinking touchy maybe even a bit grumpy --you say she eats sporatically--is she on a good schedule??? if she is touchy if she is not on a good schedule than evey day is a different set of circumstances..

my dd is touchy--but if i have her on a good schedule she can act textbook--but if she is off schedule she is so hard to read,hard to put to bed-hard to winddown and most things will wind her up instead..

one thing with her also is all her cries sound the same--

[cwolff]

Must be touchy then, because I cannot tell one day from the next what it will be.  She refuses to be on a "routine" of any kind.  Doesn't wake up the same time, won't nap the same on any given day.  Lately she's been refusing to nap and now we've gone from 5 min bedtime to over an hour.  She just will not settle!  This was not what I had in mind when I thought of having children.  It is really, really hard to find joy in anything because nothing at the moment seems very joyful.  Even her smiles turn to fussiness due to fatigue, and it's just not fun for either of us.  I hate having to plan my day thinking in mathmatical terms of awake time versues sleep versus eat.  I thought it would naturally work into a pattern.  And her cries sound exactly the same too, and since they are few and far between what I get is mostly fussiness.  And that always sounds the same.  But thanks for the insight.  I'm going to reread the touchy section of Tracy's book.

[jayne]

the best thing for gina was a schedule.. i will try to help you set up one if you want...

and a touchy baby is not an easy baby-- she will try your patience more than you ever thought..

i had to learn to respect that this is who she is and that i will love her for who she is.. and learn how to help her do what she needs to do..

what i found was best in the beginning was to get her to sleep any way i could -- set up the routine and then work on getting her to sleep on her own.. when a touchy baby is overtired it is a mess-- and there is nothing you can do to help her -- EVERYTHING will overstimulate her --

pm me if you want

[cwolff]

Thanks Jayne, I'd love to set something up.  I just can't figure how to do it with the off napping, plus trying to fit in solids is new too.  I do having a feeling my patience is going to be stretched.  It already feels a little thin.  I am trying, so hard, to love every experience.  But this bedtime and naptime stuff is really just making us both a bit miserable.