Hey June/July 05 MOMS

[Jennifer2e]

I have a few questions for those of you who are a bit ahead of me.

Did your LO's take a paci?  If so did you take it out after they fell asleep?  Did it become a problem?  Did they wake for it at night?

Did they start finger sucking?  If so when?

When did they start to self soothe?

How long did it take you to put them down in the beginning?  Did you pat/shush the entire time?  When did it get easier ?  When were you able to put them down and walk out?

I just need a little help.  Having a 4 week old and it is soooooooo hard.  If is helpful to read your chat post because it makes me realize it DOES get better.

TIA

[CaedensMama]

Yes- Caeden took a paci, from day one.
I never took it out after he fell asleep but more often then not he would spit it out when he was asleep.
He doesn't wake for the paci at night (usually, every now and then he is almost asleep and cries out for it, I put it in and he is out)
For me it is not a problem at this point. Yes, it is somewhat a prop and I know that but at this point I am willing for the prop versus giving it up! It would suppose on each person though.

Caeden found his fingers at about 2 1/2 months, never really sucks them though. "Chews" on them alot, esp while teething at 3 1/2-4 months and still plays with them but he doesn't use them to comfort himself.

I was not able to put down and walk out until about 4 1/2 months and then lost it a couple weeks later - we have been moving and such and had a little set back!
Pat/Shush together didn't help Caeden, one or the other did though. And sometimes just a firm hand on his chest while shushing. We had a hard time getting him to go to sleep on his own, a little accidental parenting and holding to long at first. I would do it a little different next time!

Hope that answers some of your questions!
Hang in there - I admire you, 3 little ones so close together - it could be me in a few years and I'll be looking for more answers too!

[Jennifer2e]

Thanks Jennifer!  I appreciate your response.

Any others with their story?

[Kayna]

Hi Jennifer, my dd would not take a pacifer  :x  but she probably found her fingers around 3 months (I've heard of babies finding them a lot sooner though).  I introduced a lovey fairly early (maybe around 2 months, can't remember) and that is when it seemed like she was starting to self soothe. We've been blessed with a wonderful sleeper (at night anyway) but during naps she still needs to do a little mantra cry before dosing off. I think it's her way of zoning things out.  :roll:

Right around 2 months we went through an absolute terrible week. She would cry for over two hours while we tried to get her to sleep.  :x  At that point I realized I'd probably have to start pat/shhh. Unfortunately she didn't like it too much and I had to tweak it (took me awhile to find the right combo) but a heavy hand on her chest and a shhhh worked best. Personally I feel like those first three months are soooo hard and I'm not sure that there is a sure fire way to get them to sleep on there own.  :oops: We didn't want to start any bad habits so we kept her in her crib with no stimulation, complete darkness and quite. Not sure if it all started to sink in or if age just helped but things started to be more consistant at the 3 month mark.

Now she falls asleep consistantly on her own 95% of the time. If she needs a little help the heavy hand and her lovey work well.

I know how hard those first few months are (and I can't even imagine with two others, including another baby) but it does get better. Those weeks just drag on and you think I can't make it another 4, 5, 6, whatever weeks but when it's all said in done it seems to have flown by. HTH and sending tons of patience your way. Sounds like you are doing an awesome job with not using props which means you'll get to rest and relax when he does finally put himself to sleep.  :wink:

[ry,cait&alex]

Cait takes a binky but only consistently for the last 4 weeks or so.  It started when she "thought" she was still hungry, but yet, if I made more bottle she refused it.  So, I gave her the binky to let her "suck" and then she would go right to sleep(this is usually the last feed at night).  I can tell her "tired" cry and I usually pick her up, hold her and put the binky in and she goes to sleep.  I have been trying to put her to bed more awake so that holding her to sleep doesn't become a habit, but I am afraid that monster is here already.  I don't mind right now though.  They are only this little for such a short time and this maybe my last.  Most of the time, once Cait is asleep, the binky falls out or she has let go of the suction and I can take it out and put her to bed with no problems.  Occasionally, she will wake in the night and cry and I will go put it back in, but more often than not, she WILL find her left hand and suck on her fingers.  So she is a 80/20 baby where the fingers/binky are concerned.

Shush/pat didnt' work, but to be fair to the program, I didnt' try very long nor very hard.  I don't have the patience for it, and I had a 3.5 yo running around negating all of the work I would accomplish.  Another reason that I don't mind "holding her to sleep", I can control the enviroment around her easily and if she jars awake to a loud noise I can instantly put her back to sleep before she wakes too much. 

Boy......after reading all of this, I AM the poster child for bad habits, aren't I??  :shock:  :shock:  :oops:  :cry:   Oh well.....it works for our family and I am sure I wont' be holding her to sleep when she leaves for college.......we hope.  :wink:

She does self soothe from time to time, she puts her fingers in her mouth and rolls up on her side and puts herself back to sleep. She has been doing that for about 4-6 weeks.  This isnt' an everytime kind of thing though.  I try to encourage it, but that is going to take some training on both of our parts.

I admire you.  I know what you have going on is a LARGE undertaking, but you seem to be doing great.  It does get better, you know this.  It is probably a LOT of sleep deprivation that is making you forget.  Keep up the great work and call on us anytime.  :wink:

bj

[sara_derek]

I have a few questions for those of you who are a bit ahead of me.

Did your LO's take a paci?  If so did you take it out after they fell asleep?  Did it become a problem?  Did they wake for it at night? No paci here.  Tried, but no luck.

Did they start finger sucking?  If so when?He just started sucking his fingers last week at 4 mo.

When did they start to self soothe?at about 5 weeks   There's a light at the end of the tunnel for you!

How long did it take you to put them down in the beginning?  about ten minutes. Did you pat/shush the entire time?  yes, until he was asleep.  I would pat until he was completely out.  I never had to pick him up.When did it get easier ? after about two weeks of pat/sh for every nap, I could leave once in a while before he was asleep.  But this kid was always asleep in under 5 minutes so it was no big deal to stay the whole time. (tummy sleeper as you know) When were you able to put them down and walk out? at about 3 months.  But every once in a while I still have to pat/sh if I miss the window.

I just need a little help.  Having a 4 week old and it is soooooooo hard.  If is helpful to read your chat post because it makes me realize it DOES get better.Yes, it is very hard.  I hope you start getting some more sleep soon!  I think once the cold passes along with the growth spurt you will be very happy with his stretches!  Canyon and Christian BOTH had colds at 5 weeks while bf'ing.  I could'nt believe it either!!  Hang in there

TIA

[~Jency's*Momma~]

Jency has a paci .  I wasn't planning on it but he was colicy so we ended up with it after all. 

I do take it out after he falls asleep, some times before he is in deep sleep.  Sometimes (when I'm really tired) I just leave it in and he ends up spitting it out.  We try not to give it to him at night.  It seems like when we started giving it to him at night is when all his night wakings started.  If I do leave it in he will wake for it.

He does suck his fingures but for some reason can't find them to sleep.

He still doesn't self sooth very well.

I still can't just lay him down and walk out.  Wish I could though.