Wind down routine for 12 week old

[Mia & Scarlett's Mummy]

Hi everyone - and a special shout out to anyone still battling the 45 minute nap monster (like me) big yourself up!

We have just put dd to bed using the same routine we have used with her since the first week of her life:  bottle, bath, bed.  All in her room with her lullaby tape and light on.  Went down like a dream at 7pm.  So I'm all for routines but just can;t seem to crack it when it comes to naps - so I need some help.

Can anyone tell me what their routine is for nap time and how long it takes?  Her bedtime routine takes half an hour which I think is just right, how long should a nap routine be and what should it entail?

She'll be three months next Friday.  Everything we try doesn't seem to work.  She's textbook/spirited/touchy, all in equal measures.  I've been ripping my hair out today as it seems I'm either winding her down too early, which is winding her up or pushing her that bit too far which is not a pretty sight.

Either way when nap time approaches my stomach is churning.  So someone please help me!!

Am I the only one wishing their lo's life away?  Keep thinking at least when she's 2 I might be able to drop the naps altogether.  Tantrums I can cope with, naps will be the death of me!

Louise

[Mia & Scarlett's Mummy]

By the way - I forgot to mention pat/sshh does not work on Mia.  I have some success with blocking out her visual stimulation and sshhh'ing, but the patting winds her up a treat (tried it all ways soft firm fast slow), it just seems to add to any overstimulation

[Taylor's Mommy]

Hi There,

can you start by telling me her routine including Awake times.  that is where I'd like to start so I can get a sense if she is not getting enough or too much stimulation.
Also, what is her nap routine, and are her sleepy cues easy to read?
Has she or is she hitting her 3 month growth spurt which can also turn things upside down.
pat/shush "by the book" does not work on all babies, especally spirtied ones.  Sometimes you have to tweak pat/shush to work for your lo, such as firm hand pressure with just shushing, or no shushing at all.  The key is to find some way to calm your lo down and keep them calm while they learn to fall asleep from an awake state in their crib, KWIM?

When Taylor was 12 weeks our windown was about 20 minutes long.  So when she started to show sleepy cues (usually after apx. 45 mintues), I would take her to the room, put her on her changing table and change diaper.  Talk to her calmly and gently, close the curtains, turn on the white noise machine, hold her and have her look at her chandelier (she is a big fan of lights), and then into bed.  This lasted about 15-20 minutes start to finish.

I also remember that right around 12 weeks is when nap and bed time got turned upside down after about 3 weeks of smooth sailing, and apparently this is very normal.  Pat/shush no longer worked at all, and we had to move to PU/PD to settle her.  I am not saying you need to try that yet withyour lo.  Let's first see her routine and if we can figure her out.

Andrea

[Mia & Scarlett's Mummy]

Hi Andrea - thanks for the reply.

Okay, I'm trying hard to keep her to a routine but with her naps all over the place it's not always easy.  What I'm doing though is keeping her feeding times consistent in the hope that I will be able to spot a pattern in her napping/sleepy times.

As a rule I feed her at 8am, 11-11.30, 2.45-3.00 and then 6.30pm. (No dream feed).  She tends to also wake at aroung 5.30am for a feed so the 8am feed is a top up.

Mia can stay up an average of 1.5-1.75 hours.  Her sleepy cues tend to be fussing and 'spitting', flailing legs and arms, sighing.  What I've been doing for the past few days (with varying degrees of success) is a slow walk round the house, nappy change and then put her in her cot and let her watch her mobile, darken her room and then dummy - hand over eyes and sshhhing if she's struggling to settle.

We always know she's definately tired because she sucks like mad on her dummy and her arms go up around her head.

The reason I put her mobile on is that in the past she's started crying when I've put her in her cot so the mobile is a distraction.  It fees like I'm putting her in under false pretences but the end seems to justify the means at the moment!