March/April Thread #3

[Colesmom]

hi everyone,

Cole woke twice around the hour mark but settled back well.  I have just settled him twice around the time he would normally feed.  One pupd and some handholding and he's asleep    My Q-how long do your los go without feeding?  10,11,12 hours?  What is a reasonable expectation for the first night not doing the dreamfeed?  Should I do pupd until wakeup time?  He last fed at 5:25 and was down by 5:50 for sleep.

Thanks

[Olivia's Mommy]

Traci--did you just drop dreamfeed, or did you push it back 1/2 hour like Tracy suggests in her book? I'm getting ready to drop it, and am curious how others have done it.

[Colesmom]

Hey Nancy-if you want to get technical, ours wasn't a DF as Cole woke for it.  Typically 4 hours after last feed, but sometimes as late as 1am!  I just dropped it cold turkey just now.

[becca24]

Sorry ladies I am back for another vent.

Right now I am supposed to be at my Great Aunts Funeral. Halle thought today would be a good day to refuse all breasfeeds and cry non-stop for an hour right when I plan to get ready. Eventually I got her to take a bf then some yogurt. Phew!! So after a 45nap this morning she is asleep now and I am not waking her. I rang my Mum to see if she was ready so she could come down and help me get ready. As usual she is too concerned about the way she looks and was stressing out about it. She said to me "I can't help you, my hair is wet"  :twisted:  :twisted: THEN about 15mins later my auntie rings "I am at your mothers, she does not know what to wear and wants you to come and help her" my reply -  ^$#%&*&^ &*^%%((**&^ _(*&&%%$ 8^^% ^&%^* #@%%% ^%$$#$$%^ $#@!#$%^&^ &&^$##@ &^% @#$% #%%^ %##%%&* %##%^&*(( &%$$%^*((9  :evil:  :roll:  I get Halle asleep and try to get dressed for when she wakes up. I have one wardrobe with casual clothes and another with formal stuff and work clothes. So I go to get some funeral-appropriate clothes out of the work wardrobe and there is a SPIDER hanging in there !!!! It gets on my arm so then I scream and flick it off. Of course now I don't know where it is so I am not going back in there. THEN I go to put some make-up on and DROP the stuff all over the floor and it shatters into about ten thousand pieces !!! Finally I am ready and sitting here waiting for Halle to wake up so I can dress her and go. Hopefully she won't be long so I can stand out the front and pretend I had been there the whole time :roll:

Don't worry I am not being insensitive, If there is such thing as heaven my great-aunt would be up there laughing at me right now because she know how crazy I am  :lol:  :lol:

[Arwyn's mom]

Nancy... about the DF... I had almost dropped it about 2 months ago. I pushed it back 30 minutes every 4-5 days or so (the book says 3) and had it back to 9 pm when Arwyn started her crazy waking up during the night.

Traci... sorry to hear that Cole (and you) are having a hard time right now. Don't worry, your great little sleeper will be back. About the cold turkey DF... I think you will be able to tell if Cole can do it. If you think that 12 hours is too long for him, trust your instincts. I usually judge on whether Arwyn had a good feed at the last BF... then I judge when next to feed her. I can tell if she is hungry because if I put her back to sleep and then after 30 min. she wakes up again (twice -- I put her back down again to see if she will wake again) and then I will usually chalk it up to hunger. I hope this isn't too confusing.

Judy... I also get "good for you" comments but they are not from my circle of friends who have children. They are mostly from people who believe in BFing (or so I would assume). Even a close friend of mine, whom when I shared with her that Arwyn was biting me, suggested that I switch to formula straight away. It would have been an okay suggestion but Arwyn won't take a bottle. :roll:

Bec... just saw your post... Mothers, huh?  :roll: (One day, we'll be joining those ranks, too. :wink: ) Good for you for seeing your Great-aunt's point of view. I hope Halle does okay today.

Hmm... toothpaste. I guess the advice is different for different parts of the country and world. Our water doesn't have fluoride in it. Could this be why I need to start brushing with fluoride toothpaste?

Well... we are having a cranky day. It took me 30 minutes to put her down and it never takes that long. Anyhow... I am preparing for a pu/pd night. I am thinking that nursing at night is making Arwyn not interested in her BFs during the day (especially the 11 & 3).

[Judy]

Bec - what a crazy few hours eh?  I'd have freaked about the spider too - and depending on the size I would have considered the need to move.  

Traci - hope the rest of your night goes well.  I honestly would think that Cole should be able to do the whole 12hours... but whether you and he are comfy doing that straight away in one night is up to you both.  As Ankie said - I think you'll know, or rather he'll let you know .  Kaia and Hannah went the whole night right off after that - although they still aren't getting quite the whole 12 hours - about 11hrs right now.  They aren't waking starving and demanding food though - just awake and I'm not interested in doing anything but nurse at that time. :roll:  I have to say though - those first few nights with 2feedings suddenly gone - well I was SO full that first night I rolled over to my side and got stuck on those huge boobs that then proceeded to leak from the pressure! LOL

Can't wait to hear how the night goes.

[Olivia's Mommy]

Traci--hope your night goes well.

Ankie--did you figure out the reason for Arwyn's wakings? Was it related to dropping the DF?

Bec--I'm so sorry to hear about your rough time...sometimes I think it would be nice to have family close, but I guess it's not always what it's cracked up to be, huh?

[kq]

Wow! I work a weekend and come back to 9 pages and a new thread! I have been lurking but not posting as I have had to get over  the weekends' work. Shiftwork plus baby is hard work! I get home about 1-2.30 am and Sam is up at 6 am! DH watches him but I am in bed hearing giggles and feel sooo left out so I come out and join in the fun at the expense of sleep!
Cute pics everyone!
Comments on BF, I have mainly gotten positive comments except from my family and chinese friends. ANKIE, it is cultural here as well for New Zealand Chinese to bottle feed even if it is EBM. Wierd!!! :roll:
Traci and Cathy, sorry to hear about your nights.. Cathy, the screaming you had does sound like it may be teeth.
Flouride toothpaste-I just ran upstairs to check and the packet says that I should only use it when they are able to spit. What is everyone doing? I am only using water on his 2 teeth at the mo.
Glad to hear that your first day was good, Naomi! I remember mine and I bawled in my car all the way to work! :oops:
Ahhh friends with no babies and comments...I just let it wash over me now. To try and explain will be too difficult. When Sam was 6 weeks old, my friends wanted to know if I had been out for an evening without him yet and that I really should start doing that. At 8 weeks, my sister commented that he should be sleeping through the night. She is childless but had read Babywise!
Night sleep is good here but Sam occasionally stirs in the night (about one every 3 or 4) and either requires a few pats or he settles himself.
Naps, that is another story. We are only totalling about 2 hours at the mo with at least one 45 minute nap. Am trying to tweak A times like Andrea. Still having catnap here.
Must dash little man awake from catnap.
Karen

[Arwyn's mom]

Nancy... I don't think the multiple wakings are due to dropping the DF. She had been sleeping through the night when I started moving the DF back from 11 pm. It took almost 2 weeks for us to get to 9 pm and she was still sleeping through the night. Then... all hell broke loose over here but I don't think it is the DF. BTW, our DF is back to around 10:30/11 pm so that it gives me courage to pat/shush back to sleep.

I need your opinions. I don't know why I am second guessing myself about this but I need some validation. These multiple wakings are causing me to be very tired (obviously) and I have resorted to nursing her back to sleep because it is easier. She goes straight back to la la land and there is not a minute of awake time there. What should I be doing to get rid of this habit? I suspect she doesn't need the nutrition but the comfort... we have major separation anxiety happening too. So, my question is... how have you all dealt with multiple wakings and how long did it last? We are fast approaching 2 months now and I need it to pass, sooner than later.

Sorry guys, I needed to vent and oh... guess who's up?

[Nikki~Nathan&Danielle]

Karen, Nathan at 2.5 doesn't spit out the toothpaste yet (prefers to swallow), a friend took her dd to a dental nurse who said to continue using the kids toothpaste until they're 5 and she wouldn't expect them to fully know/remember to spit properly until then (I would have thought by 3-4 they'd know? Judy?).

Ankie, I guess this is where pu/pd is probably your best option, I'm not very clued up on that, so hopefully some of the other girls going through it would be better at helping.  I try and resettle Danielle with a bit of repositioning, retucking and patting - sometimes it works and others not.  Sorry I'm not much help. :roll:

[Taylor's Mommy]

Hi guys,

Becca-you're thoughts about baby sound just like me and I'm afraid to say that I was gulity of saying many of them before and while I was pregnant!  :shock:   Especially about the stopping bf when they get teeth.  I apologized to my sister after I found out the real deal and was afraid I may have hurt her feelings at the time. 

regarding the night wakings and sleeping through the night questiosn that Bec and Ankie asked about:
When Taylor was sleeping very well through the night from months 3-5, she did definitely do the odd wakings every 4-5 days.  (she would sleep from 7ish, sleep through her df, then wake up at 7-7:30 am! )So to me it wasn't a big deal and me or dh would go in and pat her back to sleep.  No feeding ever involved so I guess we were lucky.

Starting around 5 months till last week she starated having many more night wakings.  First it started with the 5 am wake up which was so annoying and that lasted off and on for about a month.  Also at 5 months she started waking up for her df, at first just every few days and then it grew into EVERY NIGHT!  Then she started the 6 am wake up thing around 6 months and would not go back down until I fed, so I did since it was already 6 am and that has lasted till about a week ago. 
Then around 6.5 months she started multiple night wakings where she would wake at 10 for her df, then around 3, then at 6.  I know it was still not terrible, but knowing how well she could do it was so irritating.

 :arrow: Which leads us to our decision to drop the df cold turkey in hopes that we would have our nights back, and it seems to have worked! 

So Ankie, I guess we had a rough 2 months where the nights were quite unpredictable.  We were lucky in the sense that it didn't take much longer than 15 minutes to ever get her back to sleep, but they were night wakings which she needed our help to get back to sleep nevertheless.

I really think dropping the df is what helped us, but who really knows?

Traci-Taylor now goes 11-12 hours w/o a feed :shock:   Sounds crazy, but she's doing it.  The first few nights of dropping df cold turkey I had a rule in my head of not feeding her until at least 3 am if she woke up (which was about 8 hours since her last feed).  But I actually never had to feed her because she would do most of her wakings from 9:30-2 am'ish.  Once she got past that time frame she would sleep the rest of the stretch.  So to answer your question, from the first day we dropped the df she started going 11-12 hours.

HTH and good luck!

[Little Bear's Mum]

Hi ladies, I see everyone's been busy on the keyboard again.

Hannah - good notes, they will be a good reference point I'm sure.

Bec - yes, Daniel wakes every so often, just a quick pick up, cuddle to quieten then put down and off to sleep again. Not so long ago this wasn't the case and only a feed would do. If you're feeling guilty/down about things you may have said to people before you had Halle, perhaps you could have your friend over for a coffee (or go out) and tell her how you feel now. I had a similar situation with a very good friend and I felt a lot better after I said something. She was fine about it in the first place, but I felt at least I'd apologised. And I really hope your day tomorrow is better. I thought I was having a bad day until I read about yours.  :cry: Here's a  for tomorrow.

Traci - how long is Cole's awake time now? Perhaps he's trying to tell you he can be awake longer between naps. Daniel is nearly 3 hours between his now and awake around 4-5 hours for the last stretch now. I know when Daniel was doing his major meltdowns in the morning once I kept him up longer he suddenly improved.

Kate - I love the photos of Ryan.

Micky - Jack looks great, how much longer in the casts?

Naomi - well done on getting thru the first day. I bet you'll never forget Jayson's parting words as you left on your big work adventure. Look forward to seeing the photos.

Andrea - how did Taylor change her early waking habits? By herself or did you somehow assist? I'm considering trying Wake 2 Sleep again for Daniel's 5.42am waking.

We've had a grizzly day again. I'm hoping there's an end to this soon. I think it's frustration with not being able to crawl forward, he's moving backwards though, cold lurking still, t@@th or lack of trying to break free, and missing daddy/sick of mummy! To top it off, our day started with my cat bringing in a bird and the bird surviving after I got rid of our cat. I don't like dealing with little critters and was quite sqirmy about the whole saving the bird process. Then when I did eventually let him free after making sure he was okay in a box for an hour or so first, I told my mum and she said I should have made sure he could fly, not just hop into a bush. Thanks for the support mum.

RANT: Oh, and then she started telling me about some radio programme she'd just heard about kids in daycare and how bad it is for them..Blah blah blah, she tells me this all the time. Well, I've told her I'm going back to work part time (about 10hours a week) when Daniel's 1yr and we don't have any choice as she's not here to look after him. And I don't mind him being in it for a few hours a week. I will look into other options, but we can't afford a nanny, so there's not many other options out there. GGGGGrrrrrr, she makes me so mad how she goes on.  :evil: She keeps saying she won't watch/listen to the day care stories, but she continues to do so and then tell me about them. Of course, she doesn't listen to the ones with good things to say!

Anyway, enough of that. Onto happier last comments, I started my Christmas shopping today and got the hardest ones out the way. (nieces and nephew and mum). And Daniel was an angel the whole shopping trip, including our time in the supermarket.

[Erin M]

Hi girls--
LONG POST ALERT!!
I think (fingers crossed) we are on the road to recovery around here.  I took Katie back to the doctor yesterday morning to find out she has ear infections in both ears.  So yesterday was a very unhappy day.  Poor kid has now officially had Motrin almost round the clock since Thursday - the ped said not to worry about it, but that she should be fine without it by today.  I gave it to her once more at 9PM last night (woke her up to do it!) and she's still asleep - and it's 6:15!!  Hooray!  Of course, I caught her cold and can't sleep at all, so here I am, typing away.  I hope she naps today so I can catch up on some sleep.  The first time Katie doesn't wake up multiple times in two weeks, and I can't sleep.  Go figure.  Enough about us....

Micky, Hayley, Kate - I just LOVE the pictures.  Micky - Jack seems to be in good spirits despite the giant casts on his legs!  So cute!  We're getting Christmas pictures done this weekend - can't wait to see how they come out.  Oh and Micky, thanks for the info on breathing. 

Hayley - most of the stuff I've heard says that daycare, especially part time isn't bad for kids.  Katie is in daycare two days a week, and she LOVES it.  She gets so excited when we walk in there.  She loves seeing the other babies.  Of course, I suspect she's gotten sick more often being there than if she was just home with me, but what can you do?  They've got to catch the stuff sometime sooner or later. 

Traci - Hope your day is better today.  I was planning on sending a thank you note to my ped - just can't think of what exactly to write.  Maybe I'll work on that today.  Oh, and Katie can go something like 12 hours at night without eating.  Honestly, I didn't even notice a huge difference in her morning appetite after dropping the DF, though I thought I would.

Bec - Hope your day is better too - sounds like a rough couple of hours. 

Judy/Jody - A friend of mine just found out she is pregnant with twins.  Any advice to pass on?  And Judy - if you don't mind, could you send me the link to your nusing pillow that you use.  I don't know what her plans are regarding feeding, but I was thinking I would forward it just in case.

Ankie - Sorry your nights have been miserable.  Katie's nightwakings are usually due to something developmental or sickness so they tend to sort themselves out after about a week.  Sorry to not be of more help.  And regarding BF, you do what is right for you and not worry.  In the long run, it's just you and Arwyn that matter the most and if you're both happy with continuing to BF, then do it.

Karen - shift work must be really hard, trying to get enough sleep.  I know what you mean about not wanting to miss anything some days!  Your story about your friend wanting you to go out when Sam was 6 weeks made me laugh.  My cousin and his wife have been known to take their LO out when she was not that old and put her infant seat on the bar stool.  Mostly, the rest of the family doesn't quite understand them.  Seems like they had kids just because it's something they're "supposed" to do, KWIM?  She's pregnant again and due in May.  She said she planned in that way so she doesn't "ruin" either of her summers (the one before getting pregnant and the one after the baby is born) by being pregnant.  Somehow, having the motivation to go out nightly when you have a newborn is beyond me.  I guess you just hire someone to watch him/her so you can sleep or whatever.  Like I said, not really something the rest of the family understands.

Tooth brushing - I don't do it, but I guess I really should, since Katie has six teeth (with two more on the way).  The doctor prescribed us vitamin drops with flouride in them, so she said that takes care of flouride for us.

Enough of my ramblings, it's 6:30 and Katie is still asleep.  Hooray!  The Motrin should have worn off by now, so maybe (fingers crossed) she's feeling better.  Oh, she just coughed....but it's quiet again.   

[Judy]

Haley - daycare... you know after Zoe was born my MIL started in at about 6months with the whole babies need their moms, they aren't pets to be passed around for anyone to look after, they grow up so fast how can you go back to work... blah blah blah.  She's not at all aggressive in her comments but she persists IYKWIM.  Anyway, me, being a tad on the aggressive side eventually, finally told her one day that unless she had $200k to give me to pay off my house, I didn't want to discuss it any further.  AND I told dh to tell her to lay off, which he did.   I totally understood and still understand her point BUT this is a decision for OUR family, my dh & I, not her... so provide input ONCE and let it go.

Erin how cool your friend is having twins.  My goodness, no kidding it's a HECKof a lot of work.  My girls are very much mommy's girls and LOVE to be cuddled and held as much as possible, AND prefer to be at home too... so it's been a really tiring 7months.  But so worth it of course.  (hey!  They like being in the van finally!)

Oh gotta come back to this sorry - Kaia just threw up a bunch of her feed all over us.  Thankfully Hannah is dry...(and still feeding  :roll: )

[Richelle]

Hello Pretty Girls,

LONG POST WARNING

It has been awhile since I posted, we have been crazy busy over here and there is no end in site.  The IL's left on Sunday night *collective sigh of relief*, lovely people but I have so much going on and they see my nephew (their perfect daughter's perfect son) alot more so it is Jack this and Jack that, oh Jack Jack Blah de Blah!  They also think I am crazy to have a baby on a schedule ect ect but thankfully save their comments for after I have left the room :roll: , well I have a well rested and very happy baby who has a well rested and very happy mommy, is all I have to say. My SIL is still sleep deprived with Jack who is 14 months and has never taken a nap in his crib. 

I am about half finished packing the house and half finished packing for our trip (leaving tomorrow - OMG) which I am getting increasingly anxious about...DH bought a portable DVD for her einsteins   :oops:  !  I'm sure we will be OK but the flights to get there are at weird times, I hope she adjusts OK, not to mention the cold once we get there!   

Oh and I am now officially a SAHM!  What a great feeling!

Erin - I am so glad that Katie is feeling better.  I have done the night time trip to the ER with Sophie and spent the night, I know how scary it can be and our ped. also saved my sanity/the day.  I gave her a little thankyou post card with Sophie's picture on it - very easy to do on the comp.  I hope you feel better soon.

Traci - Sophie always goes to bed around 7 and she goes 12 hours without food no problem.  I used to expect her to be ravenous in the morning but she isn't, just plays while I get breakfast and COFFEE ready.  I think that Judy gave you great advice but also trust your judgement you are afterall Cole's Mommy!

Bec - ROTFLMAO, I know I shouldn't laugh but what I wouldn't give to be a fly on the wall in your house!  I hope the day got better and I imagine that Halle was a star!  I know exactly what you mean about things that you said before having a baby and being pregnant.  Friends of mine who say stupid things to me just get told to stuff it, they have no clue.

Ankie - I know Arwyn will get past this and IMHO, you can tell ME to shove it if you like, I think that she can make it through without a feed, like i said please disregard if you find me over the line!  I also think that it is wonderful that you are BFing and have gotten opposite comments when Sophie stopped at 4 months, people telling me I should have kept trying or at least pumped if she would only take a bottle.  One of my friends (sans baby) went so far as to say that the day Sophie gets cancer I will regret switching to formula  :shock:  :shock:  :twisted: , needless to say she got told to #$@^%$R&^*&^^*&(@!  I actually gave her a real good 'what for' and she said that she never realized that making random comments on other peoples children was a big deal :shock:  :roll: !

Micky - Jack is sooo cute, in the new avatar and his bath picture.  Also ROTFLMAO at the caulk debate!!  I would say it straight out and see how it goes over probably get a good laugh!

Kate - Ryan is so flippin' cute as well, what a sweet tooshie! 

Hayley - Daniel is adorable - what a great xmas card that would make.  Don't mother's just know it all.  If you are comfortable and confident in what you are doing she will catch on!

Karen - Kudos to you and shift work!  My god you must be beat!  I know what you mean about being left out though.  I hope you have some rest in your not too distant future.  I still don't leave Sophie at night and she is sleeping and hasn't woken up in the night in 2 months, different strokes I guess.

Judy LOL at getting stuck on your big bubbies - I had a picture in my head of a turtle stuck on it's back!!

Hannah - Very good notes, very nice!  I am opposite and very bossy when it comes to Sophie, one of the reason's I think that MIL gets a little put off.  Is your friend doing this as a favour? 

Naomi - YEAHHH on your big successful first day!!  I can't wait to see pic's!

Cathy - It does sound like teeth, this to shall pass!

Phew must go get packing!